Reddy Family & Reddy Real Estate Team Blog - Seattle

Sun-rising As A House Keeper

2012-01-28T17:48:00.000-08:00

Have you ever played that ice-breaker game "Tell us one thing that no one knows about you?" It seems recently I have been involved in this game. Each time I have hesitated to tell my secret. It's not that I was embarrassed about my secret. I was more concerned of the perceived opinion of why I was doing it rather than the fact of what I was doing. And so it was when it came my turn I would think of something else that others would not know about me.

A few people in my life that are very close to me know what it is that I am referring to. For about a year and a half I have been getting up early on Friday mornings to go to work. Most people know that I am licensed real estate broker and of course think that this is the only work that I do. It had been since March of 2005. Around 2008 things changed, drastically. Our local real estate market crashed right about the time that I was ready to deliver our son Michael.

With the down market I found a great distraction in being home with my son. A true blessing really. I continued to work in real estate while enjoying my time with our son. At the same time our daughter was starting her transition from graduating high school and entering the world of University. Thankfully she obtained a 4 year full tuition scholarship to a wonderful private university. One condition of the scholarship was that she must reside on campus all four years. An expense that according to FAFSA we can afford to pay. With the additional expense of a baby and a student living on campus we began to feel the pain of the down market.

With Tom already working a full time job we began to look at my job and my income. We really enjoyed working in real estate and had a plan for the future of both of us working together full time in real estate. It seemed as though I had a choice to make. I could either work more in real estate or I could quit real estate and find a full time job that met our financial needs. Both of which meant putting our son in day care more often. Exactly what I did not want. And so it was that I went in search of a way to make the money we needed while maintaining time with our son.

I looked at a lot of job postings online. I went to a couple of interviews for part time Admin work. Inevitably they asked the question of where I saw myself in 1, 2 or 3 years. And quite honestly, I didn't know. What I knew was that I wanted to make the money my family needed me to make while being able to be the wife and mother that I longed to be. I happened to be speaking with a friend that said she cleaned houses and was paid $30/hr. Thirty dollars an hour? Are you serious!? Every job I had looked into was paying $10-15 per hour. I began to think that house cleaning might be something that I could do.

And so I did. I met with 3 different home owners and set up cleaning for them every other Friday. And so it was that every Friday morning I would get up and head out with my cleaning clothes on and my cleaning supplies in the trunk of my car. One job took 5 hours, another took 3.5 hours and the last one took 2.5 hours. I cleaned one house one Friday and the other two I cleaned the next Friday. Each home was cleaned every other Friday. It was a nice routine. There were many times when after cleaning I would change my clothes (even in my car) and head to a real estate appointment. I continued to work with all of our clients in real estate and meet new clients.

This past year business picked up again and I found it was time to let the house cleaning job go and focus completely on real estate again. Yesterday was my final day in cleaning, for now. I say for now, as I never know what life will bring. I was never embarrassed or ashamed that I was a house keeper. My fear was that my real estate clients would think that I was not 'Full Time' in real estate and thus not want to work with me. What I was doing was everything necessary to provide what my family needed at the time. I admire people who do just that. I admire a man who works 2-3 jobs so his wife can stay home with the children. I admire a family that has their parents move in with them to help with childcare so the parents can work the jobs they need to in order to provide for their family. I admire a strong work ethic and a sense of responsibility to get the job done to provide for your family.

And yet, it always bothered me that I felt I was hiding this. What I desire is to be an open book. To be accepted and at times respected for the choices I make. I don't look down upon others and yet I worry about others looking down upon me. I need to give myself the same chance that I give to others. So here it is, in black and white, I was sun-rising as a house keeper for a while. In the future if my family needs me to I will do it again in a heart beat. For now, I am just a wife, a mother, a real estate broker and an active church go-er at Westside Church in Ballard.

Out With the Old and In With the New!

2012-01-03T16:08:00.000-08:00

Out with the old and in with the new! Wait, hold on one minute there, I am a year older now...I better be careful what I say. Lord knows I am not getting any younger. What with all this white hair cropping up people are going to start calling me old in the not so distant future. Here's to a fresh start! New beginnings!

As 2011 was coming to a close I began to think of New Years Resolutions for 2012. I read a few posts here and there on facebook by friends who were berating resolutions stating they are a waste of time as the majority of people fail at them anyway and just get depressed. My thought to that is this, So, because we might fail at something we just shouldn't bother trying? Really?!?! I am so glad many of the inventors of the past several centuries did not live by that motto. Where would we be if Albert Einstein had given up after a few failed attempts, or a few hundred for that matter? Or Ben Franklin? Or Martin Luther King? Honestly I bet if we looked into the history of every great inventor or person who brought about change we would see at least a few if not many failures along the way.

Faith comes by believing in things we cannot see. Without faith I have nothing. Hope comes from the idea that even when things are going wrong they can and will get better. Accomplishments are achieved by setting goals and trying until you succeed! If we do not have faith, if we have no hope, if we do not try then what is life all about? To sit around and do nothing? To only do what others have shown to be possible? To never try something different than the norm or status quo? Are we to be nothing more than mice wandering through the maze of life?

Not me! Every day I write a To-Do List. I don't always complete it in its entirety but the days I do are phenomenal! The other days are still good just not quite as great. Every week I write a menu and a grocery shopping list. Ever since starting in real estate I have made a business plan for each year. Having a plan makes things flow better for me. It's how I work. So it only makes sense that every year I would make a plan for things that I want to improve, accomplish, try and even change.

And so this year is no different. Whether you want to call them resolutions or a giant To Do List that I give myself a year to work at is your choice. Here is what is on my list for 2012:

1. Workout at least 10 minutes a day. (even a walk is good)
2. Read my Bible every day.
3. Write my Blog more often.
4. Family game night once a week.
5. T.H.I.N.K before I speak. Is what I am about to say:

Thoughtful
Helpful
Inspiring
Necessary
Kind

6. Be less defensive and more accepting when I am at fault. Humbly say I'm sorry.
7. Be more accepting of my role as the mother of the household and that along with that comes great responsibility. Be aware of the tone that I set around the home.
8. In all things put God first and seek his advice, direction and assistance.
9. Continue to read books about subjects I am unfamiliar with to learn new and old things.

I think that's it for this year. I am sure throughout the year many opportunities will arise for me to learn and grow. I can't wait to see what 2012 brings for the Reddy Family!

Who's Teaching Our Kids Anyway?

2011-12-28T22:20:00.000-08:00

When I say 'our kids' I mean kids in the local vicinity in general. Kids in our community at large are who I am referring to. So, who is teaching them anyway? Who do you think? You might possibly be more wrong then you think you are. I am fairly certain the vast majority would answer that question with, "Well, the school is of course!" Meaning the teachers in our local public schools. But are they? There are a few of you who will answer, "They learn the three R's at school and the rest is or should be taught at home!" But is it? It's quite possible that I will receive some if not a lot of flack for this article and I am okay with that.

There was a time when you could rest assured that the local school was in fact teaching your child not only the three R's (Reading, wRiting and aRithmetic) but also manners, respect and responsibility among other valuable life lessons. Those were the good old days and if you haven't notice they are basically gone. I am not putting down or tearing apart the public school system. Quite the contrary actually. Due to the fact that many parents are no longer (or at minimum fewer and further between) fulfilling their duty of teaching their own children to respect and submit to authority (those who have rule over them whether it be a school teacher, a Sunday school teacher, an officer, or whatever adult is 'in charge' at the moment) our public school teachers no longer have time to work with our students on much more than the basics of their curriculum if even that! Instead teachers spend a majority of their time policing students and their cell phones, ipods and other electronics in addition to dealing with their incessant need to be disrespectful in class. While more and more students are barely squeaking by to graduation (or not) many teachers are becoming exhausted and in some cases losing the love for teaching they once had.

On one hand I feel that more parents need to pick up the reins of teaching their own children morals, values, respect for others and authority in addition to a little bit of common sense basics such as planning ahead, making a schedule, a good solid work ethic, etc. On the other hand I find myself thinking that the average adult lacks many of those basics themselves and the likelihood of this happening is little or far and few between and then I find myself wishing our school system could add some requirements for graduation. I believe all graduates should know the basics of how to set up a household budget, how to set up their utility accounts, how to apply for a job and successfully navigate a job interview, how to open, balance and maintain a checking account, etc. While much of this should be taught at home, it isn't. And that is why I wish they were part of the requirements for graduation.

Young adults lacking these basic skills are unleashed on society upon graduation. These same adults then go and apply for car loans, rental apartments or homes and credit cards without the basic skills of how to budget and a plan to pay for their new found obligations or entitlements as many of them see them. It is often these same adults that we see or hear complaining about how it is impossible to pay the outrageous fees they are charged when they subsequently bounce a check, overdraft their account and are late on their rent payment. I can't help but ask, who's responsibility was it to teach them the basic skills they needed to survive in the real world anyway?

Is it the parents'? Is it the school's? If it's the parents, how can anyone 'make' them fulfill their parental responsibilities? If it's the schools, then at minimum the parents need to teach their kids to pay attention in class and respect the one's in authority so that the teachers have time to truly teach during class time. If even respect for those in authority was taught at home I believe we would be better off than we are right now. Teachers would find they have more time to teach. And students would in fact learn more as they would actually be listening to the teachers. Imagine that!

Year End Review

2011-12-06T15:40:00.000-08:00

I looked back through my blog today. Besides noticing that I did not write as often this year as I have in previous years I also noticed my New Years Resolution post from January. 2011 New Year's Resolution Blog It was quite interesting to read it again and think about how this year has come along.

I can actually picture a few moments when I definitely reacted rather than reflected before responding to what was happening. I can say that I feel I did better this year than last. I guess I am still a work in progress. The other night while out to dinner with my husband after a little bit of shopping he brought up a topic that let's just say I would say, "He dropped a bomb on me!" I was calm for a moment. I then expressed my utter contempt of the matter at hand. I was fuming inside and a bit of it spewed out of my mouth. Tom sat there and took the shrapnel like a man. We kept talking. Eventually we left the restaurant and drove home. Inside I wanted to be angry and yet I felt this love for my husband seeping through the barrier I had erected. While snuggling my husband before we drifted off to sleep he made a comment that I handled this better than I would have in the past. I laughed. He said there was no way in the past I would have been snuggling him but instead falling asleep in silence, cold silence. While I might not have the 'being slow to speak, think before reacting' thing totally down, I am told I am getting better at it. Phew!

I definitely went through the forgiveness and healing journey that I set out on. I am so thankful that I am free of the hurt, anger and bitterness that had settled into my heart and soul in regards to my father and my first husband. The journey was more of a process that included healing and letting go. It was only after I had let go that the forgiveness settled in. In the past I have said the words "I forgive" and yet in the moment I said and the ones following I still felt the same pain and anger that I had felt before. It seemed as though just forgiving them was not going to cut it. There was much that I had to process and work through. A lot that I had to simply let go of. I came to the realization that holding onto the judgement of their sin was only hurting and weighing me down. In no way was it actually punishing them. In fact it was punishing the ones I love the most when it came out in how I treated them! This was hard to admit. After admitting it, allowing myself to let it all go and actually forgiving myself for holding onto anger and bitterness, I found there was room for peace to flood into my life. I had not realized just how much room the anger was taking up. Once removed I had all of this space for joy! Unbelievable joy!

All in all I would say it was a very productive year and I am thrilled with the progress of my resolutions. I wonder what 2012 will bring...........

Black Like Me

2011-11-14T16:47:00.000-08:00

I am currently reading the book, Black Like Me, written by John Howard Griffin. Having a daughter who has been interested in racial and social biases for several years now has made for wonderful discussions around the family table and in the car. Now that she is in college and has declared her major in Sociology I am certain we have many, many more discussions on our horizon. The book I am currently reading is a book that my daughter stumbled upon during one of our many trips to Half Price Books. I recall that when I finally found her after searching the entire store it was not in the least surprising to find that she had an armful of books and her problem was choosing which ones she could possibly put back on the shelf.

After reading this book Laurie was planning to pass it along to a friend of ours at church. She wrote a note and asked me to give it to him when I saw him next. Upon seeing the title and remembering what she told me about it I couldn't help giving it a whirl. The style of writing is exactly what appeals to me. It is a firsthand account the author wrote about his personal journey through the south during the 1950's. In case you are unaware, as I was ignorantly so, at that time there was still a great amount of segregation and discrimination going on in spite of the claims of how great all citizens no matter their race were 'getting along'. I sat down with the book and began to read. Only 3 pages in I could barely put it down. Our friend, expecting the book, would have to wait.

I am not quite half way through the book. Already I am dumbfounded by what I am reading. I know we studied a small portion of black history when I was in school. Rather than throw my school under the bus, I will say that it is entirely possible that I did not pay all that much attention when I was in high school in addition to the fact that I believe they taught the bare minimum on this topic. We learned about Harriet Tubman, Sojourner Truth, Rosa Parks and Martin Luther King Jr. to name a few. We did not however learn what it was like to be black or African American in a society that believed to be black was to be less than your counter part, a white person. And that, quite frankly, is putting it far too simply. I am astonished at how people were able to degrade, mock, withhold simple rights of existence and normal daily activities (ie. the use of a public restroom, the right to stand in a waiting room at a train station or to eat in a restaurant, etc), abuse and even kill another human being simply because they were different than them. It makes me sad, angry and embarrassed. I can't wait to read the rest of the book.

My world is expanding and I am learning. It's not always comfortable to learn new things. With knowledge comes great responsibility. The responsibility to respond, to create or stimulate change, to help those being pushed down, to acknowledge things that are not just, and to do something about it. I am excited to see where this leads as I grow and learn more.

Esther Marie Ruthruff (1920-2011) - A life of love.

2011-10-19T20:22:00.000-07:00

My grandma died earlier this year. Grandma Ruthruff was the only grandparent that I truly knew growing up. She was the only one who was involved in my life. Grandma Ruthruff was the kind of grandma you see in made for TV movies. The one wearing an apron standing in the kitchen making apple pie who drops everything when her grandchild comes into the room and bends down to give them a great big grandma hug. While watching that movie one of two things happens, you either reminisce about your own grandma or you find yourself wishing that was your grandma. I have the best memories of my grandma.

I can still smell how my grandma smelled. A mixture of sweet aromas of baking, greasy fried chicken, vinegar from canning or cleaning and mountain fresh laundry detergent. Maybe not all at once but a variation nonetheless. I can picture her living room with the variegated brown carpet. Not too clean but not too dirty either. Just perfect for kids to play on, shoes or not. I can see her rocking chair and just where it sat before you went down the hallway to the 3 bedrooms and one bathroom. I can see her sitting in that rocker peeling apples or peaches for canning or snipping beans. She could peel an apple making one unbroken spiral out of the peel. And I can see her lay her work aside if I needed or wanted a hug. I can hear her voice as she would sing songs while we played on the living room floor. The smells, the sights and the sounds all a part of the unconditional love I felt at grandma's house.

Grandma Ruthruff was a simple woman. Not into fashion and definitely not trendy. Grandma was strong physically. She took care of much by herself being a widow. Grandma tended her garden out back, wash her laundry and hung it out on the line to dry, all the while working a full time job at the local nursing home. Grandma cooked, cleaned, canned food, baked bread, and fed whomever came through her door. Grandma may not have had the finest in clothing or a matching handbag and shoes but she had a heart of gold and a beauty all her own.

At grandma's funeral her youngest son officiated. I am not sure how he held it together when speaking about his own mother's life and passing. I remember at my mom's funeral I was unable to speak. My mom would have been proud of her little brother had she lived to witness her mother's funeral. My favorite part of the funeral was when there was a time for anyone to share memories of grandma. It was fun to hear my cousins, aunts, uncles, and grandma's friends (the few that were still alive) share memories about grandma. My grandma had a lot of grandchildren. I am not even sure how many in total. It was interesting that many of us shared similar stories. What one of us may have grown up thinking was a unique experience we had personally had with grandma we found out that many of the other grandchildren had shared the same or similar times with her. That was probably one of the best qualities of our grandma. Although she had many grandchildren and great grandchildren not once did I feel that I was competing for her love. Amazing! This was shared by all at her funeral.

Below are some photos from the beautiful day we shared remembering our grandma and the amazing woman that she was. She is a part of me. I share some of her mannerisms, tendencies, loves and characteristics. She instilled in me a love for food, for God, for family, for time shared together doing simple things and for beauty around me. I thank God that he blessed me with such a wonderful grandma.

Lovin' Every Minute of It!

2011-09-26T21:55:00.000-07:00

Last Friday afternoon a friend of a friend of mine came down to the states from Canada. She was here to pull together a bridal shower for our mutual friend. I had met this girl once before and spent a little time with her at the bachelorette party but didn't have a chance to really chat with her. (Although I do not typically write and refer to people as 'she' and 'her' in my blog posts, I think I will this time just to keep things somewhat anonymous if at all possible.) This friend from Canada came into town and went shopping to purchase many of the ingredients needed to make the foods she was planning to make. I had offered for her to come stay at my house the night before so she could get some of the cooking done ahead of time and we could have some time to get to know each other better. After a little more shopping and a trip to pick another of her friends the cooking began. I helped with prep work, whatever she needed me to make and what at times seemed like continuous dish washing over the course of 24 hours. It was really fun, three girls in my kitchen all deeply engrossed in culinary activity. It wasn't long before we found a flow and were making progress. A minor mishap with a cake put us back a bit but we carried on. Forward march! That night and the next day we worked together to create more than enough food for the party. Three kinds of home made hummus, 3 kinds of tzastiki dip, mini shephard pies, cheese platter, olive tray, vegetable platter, falafel with pita, pumkin cheesecake, and mojitos with a choice of lavendar and ginger simple syrups. Thanks to the fantastic weather on Saturday the party began outside on the patio where we sat and ate for over an hour. It was fantastic (in my opinion). The party lasted just over 4 hours going down in history as one of the longer bridal showers.

As the bridal shower ended and the ladies were leaving one of my husband's high school friends showed up to watch the Sounders vs Timbers soccer match. I set out a little of the left over food, poured the two guys and myself a drink and settled into my chair ready to watch the match. It wasn't long before I was leaning forward and leaping out of my seat to yell and cheer. More fun!

The next day we had some friends of ours who have 4 lovely children over for a visit and to join us for dinner. We caught up on all things kids and then cooked a taco feast for 9. The kids laughed and played well together and the parents even had time to chat. Another fantastic evening!

Monday came along and my dear sweet friend, Dawn (okay, so I will put one name in here) came over after work to spend some time with me. She brought the wine (14 Hands) and I put on the spread of appetizers and a 'make it yourself' chef salad bar. It was awesome to take time to talk, listen, laugh and grow closer in our friendship.

Tomorrow is Tuesday and I am taking the evening off....well, right after I deliver a meal to a mom in our MOPS group who had her new little bundle of joy a few weeks ago. Michael and I are going to go over and visit her in the afternoon and deliver a dinner for her and her family. After that, Tom, Michael and I are heading to Big Daddy's to listen to "Wings N Things" and have dinner out. Should be a really fun evening.

I love having people over to our home. I love making food for people and sharing a meal together. I like to make people feel warm, welcome and cared for. I guess it is a gift. All I know is it gives as much or more to me as it does to them. :-)

Back to School

2011-09-14T21:38:00.000-07:00

It's that time of year again. Many families spent this past weekend running around to shopping malls and office supply stores in search of the final if not all of the items their little ones need to kick off a new school year. I'm sure other families took the time to head out of town for a last minute end of the summer getaway. The weather actually cooperated for those who were looking for some end of summer sunshine! (Next week is looking good as well...) This time each families gear the kids up for starting back to school as summer winds to a close.

While we do not have a little one starting school this year it has got me thinking about what we are going to do when he does start school. Our little guy will be ready to start school in the fall of 2013. A full 2 years away and yet I am feeling as though I need to get started on my research. I have been half heartedly reading up on local elementary schools in the North Seattle and Shoreline area. There seems to be a stark difference in the ratings according to the website I have been looking at, Great Schools. As I see others getting their kids ready to go my heart begins to race knowing I do not feel I have the info I need to make an informed decision.

As I mentioned I have been looking at an online website that rates schools and provides statistics. It also allows you to do side by side comparisons of schools in the same district. I have been shocked to read through the test score information on most of the Seattle District schools. Shorelines school district seems to have much higher test scores. Along with test scores you can read through ratings set up by Great Schools, information on teachers experience, as well as reviews from students and parents.

The main issue or concern I have with the Shoreline School District is the lack of diversity. From what I can see most of the schools are 68% or higher white with very little room for diversity. While private schools may offer a higher quality of education and smaller classrooms I feel that in some ways they shelter children from interaction with other children from differing walks of life that cannot afford to attend private schools. Private schools offer scholarships to some families who are unable to afford the full tuition. Private schools also tend to be largely white in population with very little diversity.

I personally feel school is part education and part socialization. While I do not rely on the school to fulfill all aspects of socialization it is an intrigal part of it. Interaction with children from different cultures and different home environments provide opportunity for learning and social development. When I was a child I was taught that we were to be a light in our schools. Every day we had opportunities to shine the light of Jesus Christ by how we acted and interacted with others. I have always believed my children would also carry this light into the public schools they attend especially. I believe as time moves on and society becomes more and more self absorbed this is becoming more and more crucial. For some kids interaction with another student who believes in God may be the only opportunity they have to hear about God.

All of that to say, I am not sure where our son will go to school. I will continue to research and more importantly pray about it. I want our son to receive a good education, to thrive in the environment we put him in, to learn compassion in addition to the 3 R's and to be a light in what at times seems like a very dark world. (All of the above is my opinion and how I view our schools. Other than the statistics from the Great Schools website it is my thoughts on the matter.) I am sure I will revisit this topic as time moves on.

Forever and a Day

2011-08-23T16:16:00.000-07:00

It's been forever and a day since I posted a blog. Oddly I haven't had much to say. Some of you who know me well are falling over laughing right now. Me, without anything to say? Not bloody likely! Just nothing to type. Life has been good. Business as well. The Reddy Real Estate Team has closed 3 home sales since opening their doors in March. We currently have a listing for sale in Edmonds, one buyer in contract on a short sale home purchase in Lynnwood and two other buyers out looking in downtown and North Seattle for just the right home at just the right price. It is our pleasure to help each and every one of them!

Our family is also doing well. Laurie has left to start her second year of college at PLU. Soccer training camp got under way this past week. She is hoping to gain some more field time this season as two goalies have moved on. She has the same roommate this year as last and it is fun to watch her experience college life! Michael is ever growing physically and mentally. I call Tom almost daily to tell him the "Michael Story" of the day. Most often it entails something that has come out of that boys mouth! He is polite beyond belief and very logical. For only being 3 years old he has a good grasp on how things ought to be. We find ourselves shaking our heads in disbelief of the things he understands and retains. There is nothing greater in life than watching your children grow and learn. We thank God daily for the children he has blessed us with!

Interest Rates

2011-07-19T17:05:00.000-07:00

Interest rates for a 30 year fixed are still hanging in the 4.3-4.875% range. While they fluctuate daily they are currently holding below 5%.

The Reddy Real Estate has 3 lenders in particular that they refer to clients. Two of which are mortgage brokers having the ability to loan funds from many different sources. One of which is a local lender in Edmonds having access to portfolio loans which can come in handy for particular situations. All of which have access to great rates!

If you or someone you know is considering a home purchase or would simply like more information on the home buying process don't hesitate to have them give us a call! We strive to not only meet but to exceed our clients expectations whenever possible!

Most recent client feedback:

Thank you for the info on the home warranty. I wanted to also thank you for the gift of the Home Depot card & the changing of the locks. That was very sweet of you. I just wanted to say that I appreciate all you have done for me. You have been the greatest and I will not hesitate to refer you to anyone I know that may be buying or selling a house. Of course, when the time comes for me to sell my home – I will be calling you. ~P.P.

Investors are back in the game.

2011-07-11T19:52:00.000-07:00

I once read that one of the signs of the bottom of a down real estate market is when investors start popping back into the market. We closed the sale of a home in mid June that had been purchased at foreclosure by an individual who remodels and sells homes. She had remodeled the home rather extensively and was reselling it. About two weeks ago we wrote an offer for another client also on a home in the Seattle area that had been purchased at foreclosure auction by an individual investor and is now being resold. In the words of Will I Am, "I have a feeling...." that we are going to see more and more of this as home prices have hit a new low in the Seattle area.

I lost the month of June

2011-07-11T19:35:00.000-07:00

Have you ever had that happen? I am really not sure where the month went. I suppose if I logged into my facebook or looked through my digital pics I would see where the month went. Surely I took pictures of my son doing something in the month of June. Barely a week goes by without photo documentation of sime kind. The Reddy Real Estate Team closed a sale in the month of June in addition to writing 3 contracts for other buyers. So in all reality I imagine the month of June was spent showing houses, following up with clients in between being a mom and juggling my family. Oh, and a new student from South Korea moved into our home in mid June as well. Phew! I am glad I figured out where the month went. I was a little worried there for moment.

Monday, Monday.

2011-05-26T16:29:00.000-07:00

I love Mondays. Mondays are typically the day that I go grocery shopping. After a leisurely morning with my little Michael which includes a silly show, some coloring and a quick break for breakfast we head out in our car to run mommy's errands. Sometimes I work during nap time while Michael sleeps but sometimes I get to simply enjoy the quiet and clean my house. I love Tuesdays too. Tuesdays are the one day during the week that Michael goes to Miss Patty's house all day. I take him there about 9:00 AM and he is always excited to see who is there and who will be coming to play with him. Before I head out the door he insists that I have a hug and a kiss and he opens the door for me. My little gentleman! Tuesday nights I often get together with a group of ladies to watch Biggest Loser. We are addicted to the show. We make fun of the trainers now and then and we often cry at the moving stories of the contestants. We rant about who gets voted off (every now and then we rejoice, hey we are only human...). We always choose who we want to win the finale and that at home winner as well. I love Wednesdays too. Wednesdays are quite fun. Michael and I go to MOPS or ladies bible study on Wednesdays at Westside Church in Ballard. Michael loves to play with kids and the caregivers are a lot of fun. I enjoy some much needed time with the ladies, a cup of coffee, some yummy brunch and on bible study days a little time chewing on God's word. Every now and then I have to schedule a real estate appointment on Wednesday afternoons. I go out during Michael's nap time and my neighbor comes over to stay with him until either I or Tom get home. I LOVE Thursdays! Often on Thursdays if the weather is nice Michael and I go to the zoo. We spend 2 hours wandering around in search of the bug exhibit, or the elephants, or the lions. We have such a great time hanging out together. Our zoo membership, a gift from daddy, is the gift that keeps on giving. Often times I schedule real estate appointments for Thursday afternoon during nap time once again. Other times I get to enjoy the quiet, catch up on e-mails and sometimes write a blog or two. I love Fridays too. Some more than others. Friday is the day that Michael spends with daddy. I schedule a lot of real estate appointments on Fridays as I have the entire day to myself. Friday is also the start to another great weekend and that is always a good thing. I love that Tom & Michael have always spent Fridays together. They have created a special father son bond that will last a lifetime I am sure. Friday night is often date night with my husband. ooh-la-la... I love Saturdays too. On Saturdays my whole family is home! Every other weekend our college daughter comes home to see us which is always nice. Most often I schedule real estate appointments for the morning if at all possible. This gives me the afternoon and/or evening with my family. Often times between March and October there is a Sounders Soccer match on a Saturday. Either at Qwest field or on TV. We have season tickets so if they are in town and playing we are there! Michael has gone to the opening match since they began in 2009. Not yet 1 year old he was introduced to our favorite sport. Basketball takes a close second and football comes next. Okay, we like a little baseball now and then too. I prefer to watch that sport in person and am not a big TV fan of the game. I love Sunday too! Sunday my family goes to Westside church in Ballard in the morning. We love our Pastors. I have yet to hear a message that I didn't like. I think Tom said it best when he said, "I look forward to Sunday now. I can't wait to go to church." Tom did not grow up in church and hasn't had a lot of experience with churches. In the past he was not one to run out and find a church. He has always been a good person so he wasn't one whose life was so bad that he need to 'find God'. And yet, we would both say that finding Westside Church in Ballard has made our lives better, our marriage better and our weekends better. Sometimes after church I hold an open house or have a real estate appointment. And other times I get to spend the afternoon with my family. Every day holds something special and I like that. Time with my family, time with God and time doing the work I enjoy. I have a pretty good life. Now and then I get down. Now when I do I will just have to read this post to remind myself just how great my life is!

Multiple Offers

2011-05-17T14:39:00.000-07:00

There back........ Yes, it's true multiple offers are here once again. It was once thought that multiple offers only occurred in a booming market and that the possibility of them happening in a down market was slim to none. Think again. What drives multiple offers is supply and demand.

Although our market is still down in most areas our inventory is beginning to shift. Along with the amount of inventory the quality of inventory has changed. Many short sale and bank owned properties have been in poor condition. Although their prices were lower than in 2006-2008 buyers were unable to purchase them in light of the investment they would need to make to fix or upgrade these homes. Some of the short sales have been foreclosed on and are now bank or Fannie Mae/Freddie Mac owned properties. Slowly but surely these entities are realizing the need to present a better product in order for it to sell. In light of this new revelation they are repairing and/or installing upgrades to these homes prior to putting them on the market for sale. A repaired product coupled with a low listing price is leading to multiple offers in our current market.

The 'good' homes are starting to sell fast and in some cases are selling for more than the list price and with more than one offer. This is frustrating to the first time buyer with a limited budget as it once again makes home ownership begin to feel out of reach. What should you do if this is you? Watch the market for new listings every day. Be prepared to make an offer if the home fits your needs. Also be prepared to lose out on many homes. Don't give up! Keep looking. It may take several tries and competing with other buyers. When it gets to you remember why you are doing this. Home ownership is not a short term get rich quick event. Home ownership is a long term investment that can bring you a lifetime of memories along with a return when held and maintained.

That was then, This is now.

2011-05-03T22:09:00.000-07:00

In the beginning of short sales they were anything but short and yet they were great for low ball offers. A buyer's dream! I saw many a happy client when an offer $50,000 to $100,000 below the listed price was accepted by the bank. As the market continued to decline and mortgages were more difficult to obtain things changed. Prices dropped. They dropped often and they dropped far. As new homes came on the market their list price started lower than the previous homes had as owners, agents and banks alike realized it was going to take lower prices to get the few buyers out there to buy their home. As listing prices lowered the deficiency gap (the difference between what the owner owed the bank and what they could get for the home now) became larger. Banks have been hit hard. I know, I know, so have sellers. I am not here to make you feel sorry for the banks but to shed a little light on reality. Reality is that prices have come down considerably. Banks have taken a hit where it hurts. Owners have been decapitated in some respects as they lost their home and all they had invested in what they thought was their future. Nevertheless we are at the bottom. Prices are low and banks and owners alike are less willing to go even lower than they were last year and the year before that. Loans are getting slightly easier to obtain opening the door for more buyers. The short sale and bank owned inventory is dwindling. As inventory decreases and the buyer pool increases we will see the bottom which means we will begin our LONG and SLOW climb back up. I am not saying we are going to see our houses appreciate in a way that will make you run out into the street hoopin' and hollerin' but I am saying that the days of getting a low ball offer accepted are coming to an end. Prices are low. Interest rates are still low. If you are in the position to buy it's a good time to go out and find that home. If you are needing to sell and have been holding out your wait time is getting shorter. Your reason for selling will determine if you should put your home on the market now or try wait 1-3 years longer. If you have questions send me an e-mail and we can set up a time to meet.

Life With a Three Year Old

2011-03-22T23:12:00.000-07:00

Okay, well he is almost three years old, but people have been thinking he was three for like half a year now! Michael has been talking since forever. His vocabulary is off the charts and the things he hears and repeats are incredulous (like that word, he will probably be saying that tomorrow!). That may sound like bragging to you and if it hurts your ears, my apologies. The reality is the boy talks. The bad thing is that while his little brain can remember most anything and he retains and then repeats things at seemingly the appropriate times, he is still emotionally a two year old and that can be frustrating for him and for me his mother. People hear him talk and assume he is older than he is and then when he does a typical two year type thing they seem shocked. Well, duh, he is two! I on the other hand laugh at his vocabulary and remind myself repeatedly of how old he truly is.

Is he smart? I don't know and honestly that is not my focus. Ask me if he is happy. Now, that is my focus. Is he having fun? Is he enjoying life? Is he acting and playing like a two year old should be? Yes! Now, that is what matters to me. Could I have a genius on my hands and be wasting his brain because I am not honing in on his natural abilities. Possibly (I doubt it) but who cares? Not me. All I want is a happy well rounded loving child who learns what he needs to learn when he needs to learn it. One that grows up to respect others, takes pride in his work and in himself, has a good strong work ethic, cherishes his family, is loving, kind, compassionate, considerate of others, loves the God who created him and of course loves soccer. (I'm kidding.....okay, maybe I'm not kidding.)

Life with an almost three year old is a blast. I look forward to everyday I get to spend with him and I am a little sad on the days I don't. I love to hear of how his day was at daycare as only an almost three year old can tell. And when he has his Fridays with daddy, well those are truly special days to hear about. He makes me laugh and he keeps me on my toes. At times he makes me frustrated. (That's the red hair and yes, my mother is looking down from heaven telling me it's payback. "I know mom.")

Before I know it he will be off to college like his big sister....God, help me. Thankfully that is some years away...................

The Gallery Auction - Not quite an auction.....

2011-03-07T22:25:00.000-08:00

The Gallery Auction appeared as though it would be much like many other condo auctions that have occurred over the past couple of years. Here was a development that had been completed and come on the market around the time that we experienced the down turn here locally. Initially units sold and over time more sold. Sales became fewer and farther between and the developer decided to hold an auction. The first auction at The Gallery was held in 2009 and was well received. Condos sold at about 68% of the previously listed prices.

The second auction was to be held on March 5th with the same auction company that held the first auction in 2009. It was to be held in the same place and was anticipated to sell off most if not all of the remaining units. The Gallery was nearly 80% sold prior to the auction being held. Approximately 4 weeks before the auction was to be held The Gallery condos were removed from the market and were made available for the public to view prior to the auction. Auction packets were given out and information on the auction process and documents were made available online.

The registration process was clear. All bidders were to be pre approved through one of two preferred lenders the seller had chosen. Once pre approved bidders were required to fill out a registration form agreeing to the process. Bidders were also required to bring a Cashiers Check in the amount of $2500 to the auction as well as a personal check in order to pay the remaining balance of the earnest money if they had a winning bid at the auction. The earnest money requirement was to be 3% of the sales price. We were told that no upgrades to unfinished units would be included in the sales price but would be an 'add-on' if the buyer chose to have them. The seller was offering up to 3% in closing cost credit to the winning bidders.

Slightly more than 24 hours before the auction an e-mail was sent out to the registered bidders that the auction process was being changed. The letter stated that 2 weeks into the process it became apparent that the majority of interested bidders were first time home buyers and that many of them were either scared off by the auction process or were unprepared to meet the registration requirements for the auction. In an effort to allow all who wanted an opportunity at purchasing a home at The Gallery a chance they had made the decision to fore go the auction and instead have a 'One Day Sales Event'. (Insert comment, what a line of bull.....)

In my opinion (and many others who were at the One Day Sales Event on Saturday) what they realized was that there was not enough interest to have made an auction a lucrative event for the seller and the auction company. What more than likely would have happened was the 3-4 of the units would have drawn enough interest to have sparked a little competition while many of the other units would have sold at the minimum bid price or only slightly above. Not what the auction house or the seller was hoping for.

The One Day Sales Event was slated to take place at The Gallery condominiums rather than the Hyatt (much cheaper venue). It would begin at 2:30 PM rather than 5:00 PM. The sale was to be first come first served. When my client and I requested clarification on how this would work we were told that the condos would be available for one last look from 9:00 AM to 2:00 PM. At 1:30 PM all bidders would be asked to go outside and line up. At 2:30 the sales event would begin and the first person in line would meet one on one with a sales representative. At that time they would be given a price sheet which would disclose the New and Better price the seller was offering the condos at. These prices would be less than the previous auction prices but higher than the minimum bid that would have been offered at the auction had it been held. The seller felt these prices were more than fair. We were unclear how the line would form and when we questioned further it was clear so were they. They stated no one would be 'signing in' prior to 2:00 PM but it was a bidders choice if they wanted to get there at 9:00 AM and wait in line outside The Gallery.

My client decided to show up at 9:00 AM. Upon arrival he found that two other bidders had decided to do the same thing. Tom Reddy showed up at 10:30 AM to see how our client was doing and to give him a break from standing in line. What he found was that they had welcomed the bidders into the building so as not to have them standing outside in the cold. They had taken their names on a blank sheet of paper but would not guarantee that this secured their 'place in line'. In fact they wouldn't give a clear answer as to what exactly was going to happen come 1:30 PM. Our client decided he was doing fine and didn't want to leave the building prior to the event. so Tom came home. I spoke with our client via phone a couple of times and each time it was anything but clear what would be happening that afternoon. About 1:00 PM I showed up to join our client. Shortly after I showed up they began shuffling the bidders that had accumulated in the building outside to line up. It was then that I met up with our client. As the day had wore on the staff had collected the names of bidders as they arrived and compiled a list. This list did in fact end up forming the first come first serve basis that the sales event would derive from. It turned out to be a good thing that our client had decided to show up at 9:00 AM. At least we would be second to see the price list and to have the opportunity to negotiate for a unit, or so we thought.

After hustling everyone outside it was only about 5 minutes before the auctioneer came out and once again said he did not feel it was appropriate to have the bidders standing outside in the cold. You think? He explained that they had compiled a list of when the bidders had arrived and this would be used for the order for the event. Some were happy about this and others were not. He then asked that all bidders come back inside and go up to the second floor gathering room until the event was to start. So we all shuffled back into the building (for my client this was the 3rd time I believe that he had been shuffled around the building that day). Once in the room we were left to chat amongst ourselves. This was when many of the comments were made about the change in format, what would have happened if they had held an auction, and the disgust in how this was being handled for the most part. While no one was seriously disgruntled there also was not a lot of confidence in the process either.

Around 2:00 PM the auctioneer returned and explained the new process of how the event would proceed. Yes, even more changes were made. At 2:30 PM he would return at which time he would call out 5-6 names. These names would be in the order the bidders had been signed in. These bidders would go upstairs to the 9th floor sales center where they would hear a quick debriefing on the process after which each bidder would be introduced to a contract writer. They would then go to a separate room with the contract writer who would then show them the price list for available units. The prices were non-negotiable. The price would include whichever upgrade wall unit the bidder wanted if there was not currently a wall partition in the unit. These are valued between $3500 and $6000 approximately. They would also still be offered the 3% credit toward closing costs OR they could reduce the purchase price by this amount. No other concessions would be given or offered so as to keep the playing field even for all buyers. The bidder would need to make a quick decision as to which unit they wanted. Once they agreed to the price their contract writer would dash back to the sales room and grab the contract. Once a contract was out of the box that unit was no longer available. So while it was stated that it would be a first come first serve sales event it wasn't quite so. Shortly after the first group were in their rooms with contract writers a new group would be brought upstairs for the debriefing and would then be set up with contract writers as they became available.

Now all we needed to know were the prices the units would be sold at. As I mentioned our client was 2nd in line so we were in the first group and we quickly found out the pricing. As we shuffled down the hall with our contract writer she began asking for our top picks. Our client called out a number and she called out a price. Our client said, "No." Next unit number. Next price. No. We entered the room and looked at her list. None of the 6 he was interested in were at a price he would agree to. In fact they were about $35,000 higher than his maximum. I advised him to walk away rather than stretch his budget and he agreed he wasn't willing to do that. I told him that it could be that many bidders would feel the same way and if that were the case the units would come back on the market at which time we could make a lower offer. The contract writer than offered us to make a back up offer. She said our client could simply write down the units he was interested in and the amount he was willing to pay. If the units did not sell at the event they would call us. He chose to do that.

The results are in. I am told that 11 contracts were written at the event. All were written for the amount the seller offered. I believe there were 25 units for sale so not quite half sold. We received a call the next day that the three units our client had wanted all sold. They did have 2 left with westerly views if he wanted to consider them at the price the seller was offering. Our client is thinking it over.

The auction did not go as planned. Changes came from all directions and details were unclear at best. All in all it was a very disorganized organized event. The one good thing I could say about it would be the on site sales staff were wonderful. They were friendly, patient and truly seemed to do their best to get answers to the questions people had, even if the answers weren't always right or accurate, they tried. Their pleasant attitudes and friendly nature made what could have been a stressful and annoying process tolerable. My hats off to all of them for handling a very difficult situation so well.

Condo Auction

2011-02-26T21:43:00.000-08:00

Next weekend I will be attending an auction with a client. It has become quite common for condo developments to have an auction of some or all of the remaining unsold units. Some hold an ongoing auction while others hold a one day auction. The Gallery Condominiums in Bell Town in downtown Seattle will be holding a one day auction on March 5th, 2011. I have linked the title of this blog to the web page with more information on the auction itself. (For some reason the hyperlink is not functioning- a blogspot issue. The website is http://www.auctionthegallery.com/ )

If you or anyone you know is considering purchasing a condo downtown please have them contact me ASAP. I will provide the necessary information for the auction process. Pre-registration and pre-approval is required in order to bid at the auction. After the auction I will post a follow up blog.

Super Bowl XLV

2011-02-06T22:10:00.000-08:00

I enjoyed watching the Super Bowl today with only a few minor interruptions. I saw the coin toss as I passed through the living room on my way to the kitchen to pour two rum and cokes. Grabbed the peanuts and landed back in the living room with drink in hand before kick off. Michael was still fast asleep upstairs and Laurie sat at the dining room table working on an application for a spring break trip to visit places where Martin Luther King spoke. Although sports run in Laurie's veins she was not interested in either team playing in the Super Bowl this year and thus not all that interested in watching. I on the other hand found the game all the more enjoyable since I had no emotional attachment to the outcome. No pressure.

I watched a little, I read a bit of a book, 'Don't Sweat the Small Stuff, It's All Small Stuff', watched a little, ran upstairs to set Michael up with a video, watched a little, made some dinner for the houseful and so on. We all gathered for the Black Eyed Peas half time show. I read some online posts on face book from viewers that weren't all that impressed with the BEP performance, I on the other hand thought it was awesome. Sure they were off key now and then, but many of live performances are. Especially those that include dancing while singing. It's one thing to stand still and belt out note after note. It's altogether different to keep rhythm while strutting your stuff and stay on key to boot. I was impressed by the song selection and the choreography. We were all impressed that they included other performers and songs by other artists as well. It was well planned and one of the better half time shows I have witnessed.

Side note about the book I was reading. I do believe I sweat the small stuff, just a little. Okay, maybe a lot. I have always known this but it's fairly easy to ignore or make excuses or talk oneself out of the fact that you react more than you should to some of life's minor irritations. I found the book at half price book today while out with my girl. I think the timing is perfect considering all that is currently going on in my home. It's a good time for me to do some self checking on what gets my goat and how I might be able to go with the flow a little better. Yet another part of my journey..........

Back to the Super Bowl. All in all I enjoyed watching it with my husband even if we were both slightly distracted with this that and the other throughout some of it. Best part was seeing Green Bay kick some Steeler butt! Not truly a Packer fan but it was nice to see them win.

I Resolve

2011-01-03T22:50:00.000-08:00

2011 New Year's Resolutions

1. Be quick to listen and slow to speak - I resolve to react less. Less often. Less quickly.

2. The Me I want to be. - I resolve to take the long awaited journey of healing my past and allowing myself to be me. To learn to forgive myself. To learn who I want to be.

3. Healing the hurt. - I resolve to forgive those who have hurt me. To release the anger, bitterness and pain that has held me captive for so many years.

4. Taking time for me. - I resolve to try new things that I want to try. To let go of fear of failure. To let go of worry of what others will think. To be okay with trying even if it doesn't turn out 'perfect'.

5. Love. - I resolve to accept the love my husband freely gives. To believe I deserve it. To know that I am enough. To believe I am worthy. I resolve to accept it every day and to give it back every day.

I look forward to what 2011 has to offer me. I am going to try to keep an open mind. To give each day the opportunity to bring me one step closer to fulfilling these resolutions. To take advantage of every moment that I can. To allow myself to make mistakes, acknowledge them and then to continue on. I feel ready for the healing journey that I have begun just a few short weeks ago. Something I have known I needed to do but didn't feel I could for so many different reasons. I will more than likely blog about some of it. And all of it will more than likely end up in the book that I began in 2010, put on the shelf so to speak, and have decided to continue to write. I have no idea how the year will turn out but I am certain I am going to learn a lot in the next 362 days.

Happy New Year!

2011-01-03T22:32:00.000-08:00

Happy New Year! This evening I wasn't as ecstatic about the New Year as I was this morning. I had one of those moments where you think, 'If this is how the year is going to go then I want to skip this one or go back to the last one. Ever have one of those moments? It went like this. I was cooking dinner after a fairly productive day around the house. Feeling pretty good about myself having accomplished several things on my mental To-Do List. As I was whipping together the marinade for the sweet and sour stir fry I reached into the cupboard to grab the corn starch. Measured it out and dumped it into the bowl that already contained nearly all of the ingredients. My brain skipped a beat as the powder I dumped in began to fizz in the water solution I had going. Neuro transmitters sent a quick 'uh-oh' message to another part of my brain saying 'this fizzing was not right'. I quickly ignored the message and kept going. Having set the bowl aside I continued with the saute vegetables. I looked at the mixture and once again the neuro transmitters sent a fleeting question, I brushed it off as I begin to pour the solution over the perfectly sauteed vegetables and sausage in the wok, it was then when the fizzing sound grew and it clearly registered with my brain that this was not what was supposed to be happening. I took one look at what was supposed to be the corn starch can and realized I had put baking powder into my sauce. Argh! I was furious. It was the tip of the ice berg that I had been balancing all afternoon. The last straw that sent my emotions into a downward spiral faster than you can say 'dinner is ruined'. Earlier in the day I had received news that our daughter's car needed a repair to the tune of $400 before she could head back to college this evening. My trip to the post office had also turned up three bills for my doctor's visits in December to the total tune of $1400 and that was after the insurance. Amazing how expensive it is to have coverage only to then receive astronomical bills on top of the monthly premiums. If that all was not enough Tom had dropped his work car off when he went to get the girls car as he had found a screw or nail in one of the tires. They called and said it wasn't repairable and we needed to get a new tire which of course mean TWO new tires as you can't replace just one. This added $200 to the day. A $2000 day and now dinner was ruined too! Enough already! I said the F-word. Yep, I sure did . I said, "Un-f-ing believable! Seriously?" And I said it more than once. After losing my temper, which I am so embarrassed about, I cooled off and took the wok off the stove and rinsed the contents in a strainer under cold water. After rinsing I put them back in the wok and looked in the newly cleaned fridge and found a jar of sweet and sour sauce. Who woulda thunk? I poured the contents over the food in the wok and heated it through hoping it would taste alright. Called the family to dinner and we dished up what turned out to be a delicious meal narrowly saved after mom lost her temper. We all had a good laugh at the table as Tom and Laurie razzed me about my cooking. I offered to clear their plates early (still half full of food) but they insisted they were happy to eat it. I sat there and couldn't help but wish I could have kept my cool as well as I was able to come up with a solution to the problem. That is definitely going to be on my New Years Resolution List for 2011.

New Years Resolution

2010-12-28T22:33:00.000-08:00

A Resolve For Every Morning of the New Year
I will this day try to live a simple, sincere and serene life. Repelling promptly every thought of discontent, anxiety, discouragement, impurity and self seeking. Cultivating cheerfulness, magnanimity, charity and the habit of holy silence. Experiencing economy in expenditure, carefulness in conversation, diligence in appointed service, fidelity to every trust and a child-like trust in God.

~Bishop John H. Vincent

In thinking about 2011 I of course thought of the common practice of making a resolution. I do believe over time the practice has been given a bad rap. Due to the fact that the media covers widely the number of failed resolutions in anticipation of the New Year in addition to broadcasting every one's failures throughout the entire year, we have come to believe it is better to NOT try at all then to try and fail. This year I am taking the devil's advocate on this topic and posing the question, 'Just because others have failed miserably at their proposed resolutions for years and maybe even for decades or centuries does that truly make it a waste of time to not at least set a resolution and give it a try?' 'Is it not better to have been hurt in love then to have not been loved at all?' I am one to speak on that subject.

In searching for information on the web in regards to New Year's Resolutions I came across the quote above. I like it. It does some up a lot of what I have been thinking about the past 2 weeks and have already begun to work on for myself. I am going to print it out and post it on my mirror so that each morning when looking at my reflection and contemplating what the day ahead will bring I can read it and set the tone for at minimum the next few moments if not the entire day.

I am also going to give the idea of a New Years Resolution or two some thought over the next few days as I think I will set some for 2011. In 2010 I made a To-Do List. I actually completed most of what was on my list. I only 'failed' in a few areas, one of which was writing my book. In my defense, I am still struggling with what I am going to write, how I am going to go about writing it and how I will decide to publish it when the time comes. It is still in the works and it will be written...some day.

I don't think New Year's Resolution are any less worth while than any goals we set for ourselves whether they be for personal or professional. Anything that has the intention to make us a better person for ourselves and/ or for our community is a good thing.

Merry Christmas To All & To All a Good Night

2010-12-26T01:07:00.000-08:00

Today was awesome. I do believe I would chalk it up to being the best Christmas thus far and it has nothing to do with the gifts. Not to say I didn't enjoy the gifts I received, I did. I would say my two favorites are the Zoo membership that I didn't ask for but was an awesome idea that my husband had and a book from my daughter. I can go as often as I like [to the zoo] and walk around a place where my son can look at animals. Priceless. My other favorite gift was not realized until about an hour ago. My daughter gave me a book that was required reading for one of her first college classes. She wrote inside the book which is entitled, 'Bluebird Women and the New Psychology of Happiness', "Mom, I really enjoyed this book. It opened my eyes to a lot of things that I hadn't thought of. It explains a lot of how women actually inhibit themselves from being happy. Thought you might like it! Love you! Laurie A Reddy". Upon opening I though, 'How neat. One of my daughter's college books. Sweet that she gave it to me and you never know, I might enjoy reading it.' Now that I have read 23 pages I am into it. So far, a great read and it is truly resonating with me. Interesting topic especially considering what my year and honestly my life has been like. Without knowing it I believe I am on my own quest for happiness. I have often said all I want is to simply be happy. Well, what does that mean? What is happiness? What makes me happy? Do I know what makes me happy? Do I focus on what makes me happy or do I spend ridiculous amounts of time worrying about what others would think of what makes me happy? I could go on with more questions but I will stop there. I do know that writing makes me happy. Every time I think about it I get excited. When I am doing it I enjoy it and then inevitably I began to worry what others will think of my writing and I stop. Not so much whether they will like my writing but more so will they agree with what I am writing about or be offended by the stand that I take or the intimate details that I choose to reveal. It has definitely held me back from writing my book this year. The one that was on my 2010 To Do List. And yet, it keeps coming back to me, that call to write. And so, I do believe I will carry that item over into 2011 and again plan to write a book. I am not sure if it will be the same book I was planning to write in 2010 exactly or if it will change. I have actually been mulling over a few more ideas for books. Maybe in time I will write more than one. Oh the idea of it! Exciting.

But I digress. Christmas day was wonderful. Seeing Michael's excitement when he saw that Santa had in fact been to our home. Hearing him run down the hall to wake up Sissy and shouting that Santa had come had joy dripping from my heart. Watching him sweetly ask if there was another present for him to open and then being content when it was done was simply enjoyable. Opening the gifts I received was nice. Watching my husband laugh as he opened my fake gifts of items he already owned with a drawing of the item I thought he should go by himself on a paper with money taped to the back of it was silly and fun. Knowing he could go get the items he truly wants made me happy. So maybe his gifts were as much for me as they were for him since they brought me a sense of happiness. Going for a leisurely walk just the 4 of us through the woods not far from our house and listening to our son ask at every Y in the road, somewhat annoyingly to his sister, which path we should take was the best part of the day. Getting back home to find some of our guests had arrived while we were out and knowing we were 'behind schedule' and yet realizing I didn't care was a wonderful feeling. Having help in the kitchen who all wanted one thing, "The Perfect Prime Rib" as good as you made last year, was good for the ego. I felt relaxed all day. No rushing, no worrying, no perfection needed. What happened would be what happened. Why was today any different than any other holiday? Ahhh, that is for another post. I will just say that I have found that I am yet again on a journey in discovering me. It will be a tough road to travel but I am confident that at the end of this journey I am going to like me a whole lot more. This journey is for me. I deserve it and I have needed to take it for a very long time but for one reason or another I couldn't take it. Now is the time and I am ready for it. Back to today, it was wonderful. The evening continued with our friends, Jean and Jonathon, coming over to share a glass of wine and a whole lot of laughter. They fit in to any group and I love that about them. By 6:30 the guests had all left to go home and the house grew quiet. It was then that I began to get a headache. The nice thing was I felt I could go crawl into bed and my husband would manage caring for our son. Something in the past I would not have allowed myself to do. I slept for more than 2 hours and awoke to my son calling for daddy. He was having a rough time going to sleep. I went into his room and he told me that he needed some snuggle time in the rocking chair. I was eager to oblige. We had a wonderful time talking about our day and his gifts. My little punkin in his 'Woody' pajamas was so cute. He told me over and over again how much he loves me. After getting him back in his bed my husband asked me if I wanted to go for a walk. I believe I said I need to start exercising again as I feel like I need to lose a few pounds. We got our shoes and hats on and headed out to walk around the lake. Sissy, although in bed, would listen for her brother. It was the perfect ending to a perfect day. When we got back we laid in bed and jotted down ideas for what we could do this next week while Tom is off work. Then I read a bit of the book my daughter gave to me. While laying there I had the urge to get up and come write a blog. I knew I hadn't written in a while although I think about it most every day.

Christmas Day was wonderful and it had little to do with the gifts. Christmas Eve with my siblings and their kids brought back wonderful memories and created the hope of many new ones to come. And Christmas Day with Tom's family was full of new memories and a new sense of relaxed joyfulness. I am thankful for the gift of time with family and all of the joy it brought to me this year.

We did it! Decorating before December 1st!

2010-12-08T17:30:00.000-08:00

Every year I say that I am going to shop before the holiday rush and that I will have my Christmas decorations up by December 1st. Why December 1st? I just think if you are going to go to all of the effort to decorate inside and outside you should give yourself at least 30 days to enjoy them And since we typically un-decorate on January 1st I like to have them up around December 1st. Well, this year we did it (half of it)! Other then the day after Thanksgiving we were home that weekend and took advantage of the time with our daughter home from college and got to decorating. Michael had a blast helping us 'make' the Christmas tree. He now walks into the living room many times each day and says, "Mommy, look what I made for you! A Christmas tree!" Sissy certainly enjoyed being a part of the festivities as she always does. It's one of her favorite times of the year. To her dismay we once again used the fake tree. Tom and I delight in the fact that we saved another tree and another $80 by not buying a 'fresh' cut dead tree again this year for the 4th year in a row. Laurie fails to see the joy in this.

We had Christmas music rockin' from the speakers and found treasures in each box that we opened. Tom once again couldn't believe how many boxes we had stored up in the rafters of the garage. He also suggested that we purge the items that do not make it out to decorate but stay in the boxes. (I think I am finally rubbing off on him!) The tree was decorated in no time flat. All of the many nutcrackers were placed in their spots in the windows, on that bar area and above the kitchen cabinets. I decorated the mantle with (fake) greens with white lights, pine cones and berry twigs. The wreath replaced the large artwork above the fireplace and the stockings were hung by the fireplace with care in hopes that Saint Nicholas soon will be here! Let the enJOYment begin!

Each morning when Michael and I come down stairs or whenever we come home from being out Michael insists on being the one who plugs in the Christmas tree lights. He quickly figured out that you pull the skirt back just a hair and the plug and outlet are hidden under it. He jumps up with joy and revels in the Christmas tree that he made. Such simple joy is priceless.

While we were able to decorate before December 1st I was not successful in shopping before the holiday rush. We bought our first present the day after Christmas also known as Black Friday. We did not get up at an ungodly hour to do this however. We headed out to the mall right about dinner time and made a b-line for Santa. I am telling you it is the perfect time! Only two people in line in front of us. We had the two kids visit with Santa and we got their photo. Michael told Santa he wants a puzzle for Christmas. When Santa asked what else he wanted Michael replied, "Just a puzzle." I am sure this will not be the case come next year. I don't believe Laurie shared with Santa what she wanted for Christmas. If she did, I hope he brings it! After our photo we went to the Disney store and bought a couple small gifts. We then put ourselves through the crazy experience of the play space at the mall. It was over crowded to say the least and Michael loved it. Sissy, daddy and I enjoyed a coffee while Michael ran around and burned off some energy. Not a bad Black Friday experience if I do say so myself. The shopping however, still needs to be completed and it is now December the 8th my dear! Oh boy..........

We wish you and yours a wonderful Holiday Season and a happy ending to 2010.

Rip Van Reddy

2010-12-07T14:10:00.000-08:00

I feel like a broken record as I say once again, "Where has this year gone?" I do believe I, like Rip Van Winkle, have slept a good portion of it away. This year has been extremely trying and difficult. I have failed to blog about it for what is I am sure a sub-conscious reason. I often feel I need to keep posts upbeat with a happy ending or uplifting note. Why? I don't know. I will have to give that some thought. I also tend to shy away from what I would consider complaining all of the time, unless of course I am talking to my husband. He hears his fair share of complaining. No need to agree Tom.

I have been dealing with extreme fatigue this year. To the point of napping nearly every day. In times past I was unable to nap even if I wanted to. I would lay down with the best of intentions but would find after 30 minutes or so that sleep was not going to happen. Most nights I would also lay in bed for a good 15-45 minutes before drifting off to sleep. Now I sleep from 11 (or earlier) until 7:30 AM every single night with no trouble at all falling asleep or back to sleep if I happen to wake up. I then crawl into bed after putting my son down for nap and easily go to sleep in moments and do not wake up until he calls my name about 2 hours later. When Tom gets home at 5:30 PM each night I look at him at some point and say, "I am so tired." I no longer have the energy to work out on my elliptical and no longer go for walks more than a mile. If you know me you know this is definitely not me.

What is wrong? Well, we are on a quest to find out. At my annual exam my doctor found what she thought was a small lump on my thyroid. Blood work indicated that my thyroid is functioning normally. I was sent to an Endocrinologist to have the lump checked out. She sent me for an ultra sound where they found 3 lumps. One is 2.7 cm (large), one is 1.5 sm (medium), and one is .9 cm (small). The Endo thinks they are not the cause of my tiredness. Additional blood work was ordered as was a biopsy of the medium and large lumps. The blood work showed all levels were normal for iron, Vit B, etc. I do not have anemia or diabetes which runs heavily in my family. The only test that was positive was one showing I have built up an antibody against my thyroid.

The biopsy was completed last week and left me with a very sore neck, thyroid and throat. It is still slightly sore today. I go in tomorrow to hear the results and find out if they are cancerous or not. Then my options will be presented to me in regards to the lumps that are irritating even if not cancerous. I have slight difficulty when swallowing and my voice tends to get raspy when I talk. And Lord knows I can talk!

In addition, I am going to see my therapist this afternoon. I haven't seen her for myself in a very long time! We use the same therapist for me, my daughter and any family related issues that arise. We haven't seen her at all since Laurie left for college. I am taking note that the past 2 years have been extremely difficult in real estate and in some ways down right discouraging. That is tough to say out loud. Every client I have worked with is very happy and yet my business has diminished in the declining market. (more on this in another blog...) It has also been stressful to have a child starting college who herself struggles with an anxiety disorder. She has done amazingly well! And yet, I worry and carry her burdens still. Add to that an active two year old and my plate is rather full. Oh, and I have a marriage that must be nurtured as well! This is all just the surface as many of us know times are tough, finances are being stretched, it has been the year of thinking outside of the box. And so it is that I wonder if the stress is causing the tiredness.

Tomorrow will bring some answers and yet maybe not all of them. We will continue to search until we find the cause of my tiredness. Whether it be physical or emotional it is real. I decided I needed to put it out there are there may be others dealing with similar issues and it helps to know we are not alone in our struggles. We all like to hear about the good times and yet we all need to know we have support in the not so good times too.

>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>

UPDATE:

The results are in: NO CANCER! We are so happy and so very relieved that the lumps are not cancerous. We have yet to discover exactly why I am so tired but we are going to continue to work on that. I will be seeing my therapist again in a week and go from there.

Lazy Day

2010-11-23T13:53:00.000-08:00

I have found something I am not very good at. And that is what I would call being lazy. Honestly, most others would simply call it relaxing. I am thinking it is high time I take time for a little relaxation. It's time for me to tone it down a notch and chill.

The weather being such that it is today, frozen outside, made it a little bit easier for me to oblige my desire to turn over a new leaf and do a little bit of nothing. I got up this morning and pulled on some grey yoga pants noting that I have yet to do one iota of yoga in my life. Topped the outfit off with a comfy pullover hooded sweatshirt, some warm socks and slipped into my cozy slippers. After brushing my teeth I looked in the mirror and called my relaxed look good enough for a day full of nothing. It was at that moment that I heard the blessed morning sound of my little munchkin calling for me, "mommy. mommy. mommy." Let the day begin!

I fixed a cup of tea and a bowl of cheerios and bananas and stood in front of the boob tube watching the local news go on and on about the current temperature and road conditions. The droning continued in regards to how the ice and snow was handled this year in comparison to last. Really? Why do people get so up in arms about how quickly or slowly they melt the ice around here? I actually do not understand why people think that the minute it begins to snow the city officials should jump all over melting it off. Is this not a part of nature? Something that happens? If they did in fact have enough trucks, man power and product at the ready for the exact moment it snowed and immediately began to apply the de-icer, salt or brine and then continue to do so for the duration of snow, ice and freezing temperatures would the general population truly be happy? No, because if this were in fact to happen the expense of it would have the people in an uproar! It seems people just want a reason to whine and moan and no matter what does or does not happen they will find something to complain about before, during and after whatever it is that is currently happening.

Okay, that aside, my household was rather calm and quiet. I was watching the TV in the kitchen, Michael was playing with a few board games at the dining room table and Laurie being home from college and the Queen of relaxing was laying on the couch reading a book. It was oddly nice. Every now and then Michael would call out to me in need of something, typically attention. He wandered back and forth from watching Dora in the living room to playing games at the kitchen table not yet ready to eat breakfast. Finally he decided he did in fact need sustenance. Cheerios and milk to be exact. When that did not hit the spot he announced he was in need of yogurt and cheerios and milk in a cup. Thus the day progressed.

Big sister Laurie finally convinced Michael it was time to go play in the snow. I layered him up in jammies, sweats and swishy pants. Added to the ensemble a long sleeve shirt, sweatshirt, fleece and down vest. Lastly he dawned gloves and a stocking cap. It is amazing the boy was able to walk on his own. Sissy and Michael headed out to the deck in the coldness that I call crazy. I watched through the glass from inside my warm and cozy home, took some pictures and a video too. As they continued to play I uploaded the photos and videos to facebook and caught up on all things friendly. I am quickly coming to the conclusion that this relaxing stuff is rather nice.

My true nature has shone through a few times thus far as I have had the strong desire to wipe up the dirty wet sludge that the kids have traipsed through the house on the hardwood floors. I eyed the dirty dishes as they began to gather on the counter now that there is an extra person, namely a teenager, in the house to dirty them more frequently. And yet, I found myself able to look away as I continued to read my book. The book isn't even that good (No Uncle Ron, I am not referring to your book, it's a different one!). The floors could use a good cleaning but they can wait. I should probably vacuum the carpets before Thursday too. My phone rang and I decided to answer it. It was a tenant. They are out of town (in Hawaii, mind you) and glad to hear that I am stuck home enjoying the comforts and warmth of being inside. It seems their brother in law was to come over and feed the cats but he is iced/snowed in and unable to get over there today. They wondered if I would be so kind to walk across the street and make sure the kitties had enough food and water. Sure, I'm not doing anything anyway.

I dawned my wool socks, snow boots, scarf and down vest. At which my daughter lovingly reminded me that I was just going across the street. I told her that it is COLD out there and I don't do cold. As I trudged across the street to go see the kitties I decided that the cold was actually refreshing. And the solid white street was rather pretty. The snow was dry and crunchy under my snow boots. I noticed under the dry powder was solid ice. Yikes. A fleeting thought reminded me that I was thankful to be stuck at home today due to this cold white stuff. I made fresh tracks in the other wise perfect snow that covered the yard and steps up to the front door. As I entered the kitties came running sniffing at the snow falling off of my boots. We had a nice chat the kitties and I. I cleaned out their dishes and gave them fresh canned food, checked their water and tidied up the dry food they had spilled. I opened a few of the blinds as requested by the kitty owners so that the kitties could look outside. Noting that all was well for the kitties I re-dawned my snow boots and headed out into the cold, cold snow to cross the street. Once out I decided to take the long route and walked down the driveway and the street to my house.

Once home I decided to head out to the back deck and sweep the snow away from the house in an effort to have less of it tracked into the house if the kids went back outside to play in it. I may be taking the day off from cleaning but there is nothing wrong with minimizing the mess that is made, right? Sweeping while the bitter cold nipped at my face and hands was slightly enjoyable and I allowed myself to deny that this was in fact work and thus I was not relaxing. I decided the point was to do something I do not normally do and that is just let the day roll how it rolled. Satisfied with my sweeping I came inside. Careful to not bring too much of the outside in with me.

I made some lunch and sat at the table with Michael to chat while we ate. He tends to eat in stages so it was short lived but nice none the less. He played with toys. Came back and ate some more. Played with more toys. Watched a Diego. And ultimately came back to eat some more. I on the other hand sat and read my book. I commented that I might make pies. To which my daughter responded, "Today? But Thanksgiving is 2 days away." I told her that they had to be made by tomorrow because I was not baking pies on Thanksgiving morning. She suggested we do it tomorrow. Why do today what you can put off until tomorrow? Alright. And so I continued to relax.

Nap time is approaching and I am ready to go take one myself. Michael is dragging his feet as slowly as he can and procrastinating the actual act of going upstairs for nap. I am standing here typing and in no big hurry to rush him up the stairs myself on this day of relaxation. "15 more minutes", I told him, "And then it is nap time." I think I will take my book upstairs, curl up in my cozy chair and read a bit more before actually closing my eyes and falling asleep. Sleep will come but in moments when I do. After nap will be more relaxing until time to heat up dinner. Without actually thinking about it I had planned the perfect dinner for a relaxing day. It consists of pre-cooked enchiladas that I wisely froze after making a large batch a few weeks ago. Heat and eat is the perfect meal for a relaxing lazy kind of a day!

I believe I will end the evening with a toast to laziness, I mean relaxing. It has been a very nice day indeed.

Why do bad things happen to good people?

2010-11-17T20:18:00.000-08:00

There is a woman in my bible study group that has a baby who has a very rare deformity in that her brain did not fully develop. That is putting what she has rather simply to be honest. I understand there are several areas of her brain that either did not develop or are underdeveloped. One side effect that she lives with is multiple seizures per day. Currently they amount to 40+ per day. Each seizure currently lasts a very short period of time, a moment. Due to the fact that this disorder is so rare there are no easy, simple or specific answers. No protocol to follow to 'fix' her, no blanket explanation to what is happening, what will happen and why or how often. The seizures vary in frequency, intensity and duration patient to patient. The child's development and length of life also varies drastically. There is no easy explanation to why this happens to some children and not to others.

I remember when this mom was going through her pregnancy. Every time I saw her she was happy and excited. Pregnant with their first child, she and her husband were considering things like whether or not they should trade in her sporty two door and get a more sensible 'family' car and if they could sell their condo or if they would be stuck dealing with a rental while raising a new little one. The one thing they were not thinking of was what might be wrong with the beautiful blessing to be.

Several years ago, in 2004 when Tom and I were first dating we had a discussion about whether or not we would want to have a child in the future. We had only been dating about a year and were still getting to know each other. Tom was very clear in the fact that he had no plans of having a child. Initially he stated it was due to his age (he was in his 40's). After much conversation he shared with me that he had always had this weird feeling that he would be given a child with a deformity of some kind. He wasn't exactly sure why he felt that way. It wasn't as though anything ran in his family genetically. He just had this odd sense that God would let it happen because he was such a patient person God would think he could handle it. In 2007 we decided to try to have a child. Our son was born in March of 2008, a very healthy 8 lb 11 oz fully developed baby boy. We new without a doubt we were blessed. And yet, we really truly did not comprehend just how amazing that blessing was.

As I held baby Ava in my arms a few weeks back I stood in silent wonder as her body seized up several times in just a few minutes. My heart broke, my lungs tightened and tears welled up in my eyes as I gazed at this absolutely amazing little girl. Ava is beautiful from head to toe. She cooed and she smiled. Her eyes gazed into mine as I held her and whispered sweet words of love that only she could hear. A wonderful gift from God who came with a rare disorder and no explanation. Why Ava? Why this baby? Why these parents?

I don't know. I don't understand why Ava's brain did not develop and other baby's do Just as I do not understand why bad things happen to good people. I don't understand why Ava and her parents are going through what they are going through nor how it will all turn out. I do know this. I know that her parents love her more than anything. I have seen first hand her mother's trust in God and His will for their baby and their lives. I have seen her strength in a time when weakness is unavoidable. I have listened to her plead for healing and still give thanks for her life. I have heard her say that while she does not know the plan for her daughter's life she trusts the outcome to God. I have heard her say while they have almost no energy her and her husband have only grown closer through this. I am amazed at their faith, their trust and their strength. Are they super human? No, of course not. Do they cry? I am sure they do as they are human. And yet, through it all they trust, they pray, they live and they love. I am amazed by them.

So, as I held Ava, I cried out to God. I begged him for healing for this sweet little girl. I trust he will take her to heaven when it is time for her to go and yet, selfishly I want her to be whole now for her sake and for her parents.

Almost Turkey Time!

2010-11-15T13:28:00.000-08:00

Thanksgiving Day is almost here! I can't wait. I do believe it is my favorite holiday of the year. I love the food. All of it. The turkey, mashed potatoes and gravy, stuffing, cranberry relish, green bean casserole, rolls with butter, black olives (lots of black olives), and the pumpkin pie! Yum! I love the anticipation of the day as the house begins to smell like roasting turkey. I like preparing the bird for roasting. I like baking the pies with my girl. I love lighting candles all around the house setting a soft warm glow everywhere. I enjoy watching the Macy's Thanksgiving Day Parade in the morning while I begin cooking. I like old and new traditions shared with family and friends throughout the day. I really enjoy going for a walk in the crisp cold weather shuffling my feet through the many leaves that are laying on the sidewalk either before or after dinner. If I am truly lucky there is even time for playing cards with my girl sometime during the day or the evening. And the perfect ending to a perfect day is watching the modern version of Miracle on 34th Street as it gets me in the Christmas spirit! Gobble, Gobble.

Seriously?

2010-11-05T21:57:00.000-07:00

Just a little thought I want to put out there. If you happen to work in an industry where you provide a service to people and that service happens to include providing information over a period of time, please tell your clients when you are going on vacation and when you will return. It would also be a good idea to include details in regards to whether or not you will communicate in regards to business while you are away.

I am ever amazed at the number of professionals that go on vacation while in the midst of providing service to a client and think it would be better to NOT tell the client they are away but to instead 'try' to stay in contact while enjoying their vacation. Let me clarify. They think they will stay in contact but reality sets in and they decide they are on vacation and want to enjoy themselves and so then they rationalize that they are only going to be away a few days and the client won't notice that they haven't communicated to them in days but will simply be happy when they provide the desired information on their return. Only problem is that the client is not aware the professional is on vacation and so in actuality it appears the professional lacks good customer service and follow up skills. Honestly, this is very frustrating. Especially when the client calls me wondering why they have not heard from said professional in 2 or 3 or more days when they thought they would.

Simply put, open and honest communication that sets realistic expectations is always the best policy for anyone in a field that includes customer relations. I'm just sayin'.

Rental House Available!

2010-10-22T21:18:00.000-07:00

Need to Refinance But Can't?

2010-10-20T22:02:00.000-07:00

Many people have either tried or hoped to refinance this year due to the fact that interest rates are at an all time low. This week I have heard of rates as low as 4.125%. The problem many are running into is that they do not have enough equity in their home to qualify for a loan. Typically you must have an 80/20 LTV (Loan to Value) which means you need 20% equity in your home in order to qualify for a loan. Due to the down market we are all experiencing this is likely more difficult than you would think. Many who purchased their homes on an adjustable rate mortgage are unable to refinance into a 30 year fixed. While their adjustable rate is more than likely going down right now they may want to refinance before rates start going back up.

Another reason some people are unable to refinance currently is due to a decline in their household income which has caused their debt to income ratio to increase disqualifying them for current mortgage requirements. This is the problem Tom and I have faced this year. We currently have a 6% mortgage on our home and have been unable to qualify for a refinance due to the fact that my real estate income has decreased considerably due to the current market we are in. I recalled recently that there was a program mentioned to help home owners be able to refinance who were unable to. I began searching and found it! Whether you are an Obama supporter or not this is one item the new administration has brought to be that I am thankful for.

If the mortgage on your primary residence is owned by either Fannie Mae or Freddie Mac you may qualify for the Making Home Affordable Plan. In order to qualify your homes LTV may be as high as 125% or you may qualify due to a reduction in your household income. You need to be current on your mortgage payments and be in good standing with the mortgage holder. You will also need to call your mortgage holder directly to request a refinance application based on the Making Home Affordable Plan. Be patient when you call as the first, second, third, fourth and even the fifth person you speak to may have no idea what you are talking about. Keep asking! Once you get the right person they will now exactly how to proceed. You will be required to pay for an appraisal for the application, however they will not require the same documentation that a lender would be asking for if you were to go in and apply for a refinance with any other lender. You will have the option of rolling the closings costs into the new loan or paying them out of pocket. You may have the option of a new 30 year loan or simply reducing the interest rate of your current loan and keeping it at the current year you are on. For example if you have 27 years left on your current loan they may allow you to keep those terms for pay-off.

Another little secret that will help save you money is this: Request to choose your own Title and Escrow for the closing of the refinance. They will quote you a standard charge for this and due to the fact that they are most likely not in WA State it will be much higher than if you used a local company as fees vary from state to state. We were quoted $2600 and the local company I use is able to do it for us for less than $1100. Call me if you need a referral for a Title and Escrow company to close your refinance! Below are the links for more information on this program and to search to see if your loan is owned by Fannie Mae or Freddie Mac. As always if you have any questions do not hesitate to e-mail me. ** Remember this is about refinancing NOT modifying your current loan. These are two completely different programs.

Fannie Mae or Freddie Mac?? http://www.makinghomeaffordable.gov/loan_lookup.html

Check out the Making Home Affordable option: http://www.makinghomeaffordable.gov/about.html

As always if you or someone you know needs real estate assistance in the Seattle area please contact us today!

Live Simply

2010-10-11T21:56:00.000-07:00

Simply - without ambiguity, without embellishment.

I found it interesting to read that to not be ambigious is to be clear or plain. A synonym of ambiguous is double-edged. When I think of double-edged I think of something or someone that is always at the ready whether it be to make a move, or to have a witty response, or to deal with an issue at hand. To embellish is to heighten the attractiveness of by adding decorative or fancy details. Synonyms of embellish include exaggerate and magnify, both of which make me think of someone who is trying really hard to stand out and be noticed.

I have said more than once in life that all I want is to "simply be happy". I am sure there are many others who have said this as well. It could be taken as a vague response in an effort to avoid the question or issue at hand. And yet, for me it's not. Prior to looking up the word simply in the dictionary had I been asked what I meant by 'simply be happy' I would have responded that all I wanted was to be happy in my skin. To find joy in my day to day life whether I be at home or at work. To appreciate and find my home to be pleasing to my own eye whether it be a one bedroom apartment or a 4 bedroom house with an incredible view. To love, appreciate and cherish the people I am surrounded with. To have only what I need to eat, drink, and clothe myself with and be okay with that.

Now that I have read the definition I think it fits well with what I have always thought. To live simply to me means to not need embellishment. To have the necessities of life and the comforts and conveniences a home, car, a few personal treasures bring and yet needing nothing more than simply what is necessary to get through the day. Could I live with nothing? Could I survive without my computer? My washer and dryer? My television? My curling iron, hair dryer and make-up? I ask these questions in anticipation of some blog responder's post that I am a hypocrite writing about living simply when truly I have all of the aforementioned items. So, could I? I am sure I could survive without them. Will I go that far? I have no idea. Never say never is what I have always been told. Do I want to live without them? Not currently. Would I be willing to? If the need or situation presented itself to me that I was in a place and time where I had to give these things up in order to live or due to circumstances, I do believe I would be okay with that. I think I could go with the flow.

Truth is, I use a hair dryer and a curling most every day. I drive my car when I need to go places. And I try to wear descent clothes when going out in public. I consider myself one who lives simply because I am not consumed with the need for new things, the next best item. I don't long for bigger and better toys, cars, a home, brand name clothing or accessories and the like. None of these things bring me happiness or even spark the idea of joy. Now, a cruise on the other hand to some warm exotic place, well that might spark my happiness meter in all honesty. That aside, when I say I want to be simply happy I truly mean that I want to feel happy just being. I want to feel happy just waking up to the one next to me that I love day in and day out. And I do! I want to feel the joy of being surrounded in life by the people I call friend. And I do! I want my face to light up when I hear my children and see them come into view. And it does! I am simply happy living simply.

I have lived in several homes throughout my childhood and adult life for varying reasons. Big homes and small homes. I think the smallest place I have ever lived is the one bedroom apartment I shared with my daughter Laurie when it was just the two of us. We made it work and I actually loved it! We had simple furnishings that had been given to us for the most part. I bought items to decorate with from the dollar store or on sale at Fred Meyer now and then. The apartment was simple and uncluttered by stuff. We had a TV but no cable and no other electronics. Laurie and I spent most of our time playing board games or going for bike rides. Sometimes I miss that time that we had together. Simple times of talking and laughing while playing games without the distraction of the television and the Internet. My current house is large. I often say I think it is too big. Tom usually laughs at me and says, "What are you talking about? It's not that big." I guess for me, it is. I would be happy in a 2 bedroom cottage with a little yard. Just enough to live in and enjoy, but not so much to maintain and pay for day after day, year after year.

I can't help but wonder what would life be like with less house, less mortgage debt, less distractions and less obligations. What would we fill our days and evenings with if we had less to do each day? What would we do with our money if we owed less or nothing? Would I work? If so, what kind of work? Would I continue in real estate or try something new? What kinds of things would I do with my son each day if I had more time and less to fill it up? Would I help others with some of my new found free time? Or would I simply fill it up with other obligations forgetting why I had wanted to eliminate things in the first place? All very good questions and ones I hope to find myself facing at some point in life.

I think I would have no problem living even more simply than I do now..............

Another year older

2010-10-09T15:21:00.000-07:00

One thing we all have in common is the fact that each and every year we have the opportunity to celebrate getting older. I know, some of you reading this right now are making odd noises, grunting and maybe even cursing at the computer screen. Celebrate? Did she say we have the opportunity to celebrate getting older? What alien planet is this lady on anyway? Oh, I know, she is one of those proverbial optimists that always sees the glass half full, finds pleasure in the simple things in life and all that crap. Let it be known (and those of you who know me well know this to be true) I haven't always been this way, at least not completely consistently.

My mother would probably disagree with that last statement. She used to say I came out of the womb smiling and bubbling with joy on the inside. Not long after my mom died my mother-in-law told me that my mom had said to her that I have always been a happy, joyful, bubbly person and the kindness I exhibited, which at times may have seemed fake, was a true reflection of who I was. My mother-in-law had said when she first met me she couldn't believe that someone could be as happy as I was all of the time and it actually be natural. That isn't to say I don't have my down times. I get frustrated just like the rest of the world. (Just ask my husband.) And yet, for the most part I am content to simply be happy with the simple things in life.

I believe a person who has experienced great pain, whether it be physical, mental, emotional or great heartache comes out the other side of it one way or the other. Some come out with a renewed sense of joy and an innate ability to find joy in simple things. They are simply happy for peace in their life and find they do not need events or gifts to spark a sense of happiness in them. Not that there is anything wrong with gifts and great events. Other people come out the other side so tarnished and broken that they are filled with bitterness, anger, hurt and resentment. These people often find it difficult to see joy in anything, big or small.

I would say I have waffled a bit. Initially I was over joyed to just be out of that time of my life. Fascinated with the simple pleasures of life and the great joy of being me without reservation or fear of repercussion. I do believe I bubbled with happiness at new friendships, time with family, and the peace I found myself surrounded with. And then there were times that I felt the anger and bitterness of what had been and all I had missed and endured well up inside of me with a vengeance. At times I wanted revenge or to see those who hurt me suffer in some way shape or form. Harsh, I know. Peace overcame and healing began and has continued. I no longer wish for revenge. I relish in the peace, love and joy that I am ever surrounded in. That is enough.

Back to birthdays as I digressed.....I became me again when I was nearly 28. The standing joke amongst women is that they are forever 29 or they are celebrating their 29th birthday for the 8th, 9th or whatever time. I on the other hand have enjoyed every single birthday since that time and look forward to the next. My late 20's were wonderful. My 30's have been fabulous. And I can only imagine that my 40's are going to be incredible!

For my 37th birthday I spent the day from beginning to end with people I enjoy surrounding myself with. I started the day with my little guy. Michael and I had a nice breakfast together and watched a show. Then we headed to our church for the Ladies Bible Study. Michael played with the kids and I got 2 hours of MOM time with other ladies and some really yummy food. Oh, and my friend Shannon brought me cheesecake and strawberries. Yum! Then I dropped Michael at his amazing care giver's house for the afternoon (she watched him for free for my birthday) and I headed to Edmonds for lunch with my pseudo "mom", Carole Carroll. After a lovely lunch I dashed to the Olympus Spa for some quiet and reflective me time. It was fabulous! After that I came home to have a drink with my fabulous husband who had left work early to pick up our son from childcare. Then we went out to Red Robin, a totally kid friendly place, for a fun and affordable dinner. The only thing missing was my girl, Laurie. Being off at college kept her away from home on my special day much to her dismay (and mine too). She was there in heart and spirit and we spoke on the phone. My day was full of special yet very simple moments that I have learned to cherish deeply. Life may be short or it may be long. Either way I intend to be thankful for every moment of it.

Portholes - Where do you want to go from here?

2010-09-28T23:14:00.000-07:00

I heard today that mistakes are the portholes for growth. That resonated with me. Everyone makes mistakes. Some people just handle them differently than others. It's easy to get discouraged in life. Especially now, considering our economy, the stock market, and the housing market, all of which have a direct affect on many people's bottom line and day to day living expenses. There is little more unsettling than wondering where your next paycheck or meal is coming from. And if a lack of money is due to a poor choice or succession of choices it is difficult to swallow. When finances go array seemingly pulling the rug out from under your feet all that seemed stable is suddenly sinking sand.

Choices. We make them everyday. Small choices like brushing our teeth before we head out the door or grabbing a banana instead of a cookie as we dash to our car. Big choices like paying with cash instead of charging to a credit card and incurring further debt or fixing Old Betsy rather than taking on a hefty monthly payment for that new fancy car we secretly want to drive. Or maybe its a choice to stop and listen to our child share about their day, or tell us a tall tale about something that you know couldn't possibly have happened and yet their face lights up when you show even the slightest interest in the dinosaur that is crawling through the bog that is under their bed. Whether it is a choice that costs or saves you money, time spent with a child or loved one, a decision that redirects your career and future, or a choice made spur of the moment with little or no thought, choices direct the path we take throughout our day and throughout our life.

Mistakes. We all make them. More often than we would like. And yet, I can't help but wonder if we looked at our mistakes in a different light if they might not be all that bad. I read a book called Parenting with Love & Logic. Oddly enough it is about allowing and even offering opportunities for your child to make mistakes. Seriously, you might ask. Yes, seriously. The book suggest that we give our child choices starting when they are very little. We started before Michael was even two with choices such as, Do you want to wear your coat or carry it? Do you want to walk up the stairs or do you want mommy to carry you? The idea being that either choice is one that I can deal with him making and yet he feels a small sense of control. As the child gets older the idea is to give them bigger choices to make and to even present some options that when chosen will lead to a consequence. The consequence shows them with choices come responsibility. Obviously we do not want to see our children get hurt or wind up in jail so the advice is to always give them choices where you as a parent can handle when they have to go through the consequence. There will come a time in life when we won't be there to guide them through decisions and they will need to have the confidence that they can make right choices.

When our child makes the wrong choice and there is a consequence it is not the end of the world nor is he a failure. He just made a choice that led to a consequence. It is truly an opportunity for them to learn. If he chooses to carry his coat rather than wear it he may be cold, for a little while. The cool thing is all he needs to do is put his coat on! Your choices may not be quite this simple and the consequences of making the wrong one might be a bit steeper than a little chill, and yet they are still an opportunity for learning and for growth.

It's easy to get upset when we make a wrong choice or when our actions lead to difficult times. Easy to get discouraged, down and even depressed as we feel things just aren't going our way. And when one choice after another seems to spiral out of control its understandable to become discouraged altogether. Believe me, I know. And yet, if my child makes mistake after mistake I encourage them to think about the choice, look at the options, determine what they could have done differently, and decide where they should go from here. A valuable skill to have in the workforce, in marriage and in life in general.

This morning when I heard that little tidbit, Mistakes are Portholes to Growth, it got me thinking. I have made a lot of choices in life. Several in just the past 3 years that have definitely changed the course of my life and even affected my immediate happiness and quality of life. Some are good and some have had a less than preferred affect on my day to day life. Reflecting on them today gave me time to realize I can wallow in my choices and remain stagnant or I can look at my options and decide where to go from here. I decided to look at my options and take action to change the direction of where I am headed. After a few phone calls and a bit of brain storming I am ready to see where these new portholes lead.

You're Not Alone

2010-09-22T22:07:00.000-07:00

Today was the first day of our fall Bible Study for MOPS (Mothers of Pre-Schoolers). We are using a book called "Real Moms, Real Jesus". We are all interested to see what the book and the Bible say about how Jesus can relate to being a mom. That said, there was a bigger theme at our meeting today.

I was truly surprised when as we went around the room and each woman introduced herself that I heard over and over again the longing for friendship. It seemed out of nearly 30 women at least 20 or more said in one way or another they were looking for connections with other women, new friends, friends with a love for God, other moms to get closer to. I first started coming to MOPS in late March. The group at Westside Church in Ballard is inviting, friendly and fun. As I looked around the room each week I would find myself thinking that surely these women already had close friendships and while they were friendly to me it was doubtful that they needed me to be there new best friend. Imagine my surprise today when the reality shared was that the majority are longing for friendship.

Last week we had our first MOPS meeting and Amanda Stubbert (I almost said Amanda Crobett. Inside joke for Amanda here...) shared with us the story of when she found out she was pregnant with her first child. The actual point of her story was that it was a very difficult time for her and one where she definitely felt she was alone. She truly thought no one else would have felt the way she did and couldn't possibly understand what she was going through inside. Amanda went through a time of hiding her true feelings whether it be out of fear of disapproval or possible rejection she didn't believe anyone would understand how she was feeling. What she later learned is that no matter what you are going through it is quite likely that there is another woman either going through or that has gone through exactly what you are experiencing. When we open up and make ourselves vulnerable we will more than likely find support and encouragement sitting right across the table from us at MOPS.

Today at the Bible Study when one woman shared her prayer request through tears and what seemed like true vulnerability I couldn't help but look at her and say, "You're not alone." I too have felt what she is feeling lately. And I too have been too embarrassed to share or admit it. And yet, when she shared rather than looking down on her as I thought others might do to me, what I felt was compassion and a longing to let her know it's okay. She thanked me for saying that and for just a moment we shared an understanding smile with each other. Oh, the feeling to know you are not alone. You are not the only one going through this struggle that seems never ending. The only one fighting to get through the day, or struggling to end a bad habit, or longing for a brighter tomorrow, or whatever it may be at that time that you are dealing with. And just 3 simple words calms as it creates a connection. You're not alone.

I am looking forward to the bible study and I am looking forward to getting to know these women. I am looking forward to new friendships and a stronger relationship with Jesus.

2010-09-21T11:24:00.000-07:00

Laurie shared with us her first writing assignment for her college Psych class last night on Skype. She read it to Tom and I. We both shed a few tears. It is amazing, difficult and also a blessing to hear in our daughter's own words where she has come from, where she is at in life and where she is going. It is a blessing to have confirmed what we know to be true, our daughter is stronger than she could ever imagine. Shared with permission:

Laurie A. Reddy
Johnson/Alberto Psych 113
“Where I’m From” Poem
Due: 9.21.2010

I am from a rough night with a lot of yelling and breaking glass, a morning with the silent treatment.

I am from “You’re a failure” and “I don’t want you anymore”.

I am from “Let’s go, we don’t deserve this anymore”, running away in the middle of the night.

I am from counseling, crying and pain.

But that’s the past.

I have always been embraced by a mom who brought me out of a nightmare, and into a beautiful life.

I am now surrounded only by “I love you” and “You are amazing”.

I am now surrounded by a little red head that jumps on me and yells “SISSY!!” if I’m not awake early enough.

I am now from half-adoption papers and last name changes.

I am now loved by a dad that I wish I had always had, but realize, I will have forever.

I am now oblivious to those words of hatred, and am now receiving words of praise honoring my success.

I am now a young woman with a purpose, never again to be a little girl abused.

That’s the present.

I will never allow someone to control or harm me, my mom or any family ever again.

I will continue to prove the man wrong who tried to hold me down.

I will be a foster mom, taking in the kids from the broken homes that need the most love.

I will be the first female General Manager in the NBA.

I still have the pain, the hurt, and the memories. But instead of running from them, I can face them head on.

I will take my fears, and turn them into success.

That is my future.

How To Sell Your House in Any Market

2010-09-16T12:27:00.000-07:00

Reality is something we can't change. It is what it is. We can however choose how we respond, control whether or not we react, and plan how we move forward for our own well being.

There once was a time when it seemed altogether easy to sell any house. I do recall even in the hottest part of the boom a house that actually had some issues that seemed insurmountable and the underwriter wouldn’t allow us to close without a few repairs and alterations being completed. This was nearly unheard of in the boom. The boom is gone, the bubble effectively burst and we have been in a down or buyer’s market for what to some has seemed like forever.
Most everyone has seen a home or two or three in their neighborhood with the for sale sign up month after month without selling. What is a seller to do? How do you sell your house in a down market when the reality is that you need to?!

Meet with your Realtor (hopefully that is The Reddy Real Estate Team!) and review all of the data. I know...boring. And yet it is the reality of our local market. Make sure it is narrowed down to your neighborhood. What's happening? What is selling? What is not? Why? The next crucial thing to do is to consider your home as a house. Take a non-biased look inside and out. Can't get past the list running through your mind of all that you have done over the years and what you personally love about your home that makes it worth so much more than any other home on the market? Then listen extra carefully to your Realtor remembering that while I have not lived in your home I have been in a lot of homes, shown a lot of homes and often have insight on what is currently most important to buyers who are ready, willing and able to buy. In the end that is what truly matters most.

Consider what current active buyers looking for and expecting in today’s market in the home they are willing to sign on the dotted line for. While it may be that some of their expectations are skewed and unrealistic it is important to pay attention and determine what you can provide in your home that they are looking for. This will make your home stand out amongst the sea of unsold homes and help you to be one of the 20% of homes that sell in the first 30 days! Note that only 9% of homes sell in the next 30 days and it drops even lower over 60+ days. We find that many homes (an estimated 54%) that have not sold in the first 90 days go off of the market unsold.

As much as we hate to hear it price is often the key issue with a home not selling. There are those homes that I go into that truly could use some modern updating, a little curb appeal help, some highly beneficial staging and maybe a decorators eye for interior paint colors that could help an unsold home become that one that now will sell. If we have gone through and fixed all of the eyesores, repaired the hazards, updated the pre historic flooring and shag carpet, removed personal decorations and staged it for the masses then it’s time to get serious about price. It’s time to forget about what it would have sold for in 2005-2007. Let me say that again because it seems to be the hardest thing for a home owner to do. It’s time to forget about what your home would have sold for in 2005-2007. We are in 2010 and homes are NOT selling for what they would have sold for during the boom. Not even if you have updated the kitchen and the bathrooms, installed a new roof and new windows, and planted those lovely hydrangeas out front. We are no longer in the boom. Period. Tough to hear? Believe me, it’s tough to say too!

All that said, it is possible to sell your home if you are ready and willing to be realistic about the market in which you are selling. If now is the time for you to take a look at putting your home on the market please give us a call and we will do our best to guide you through the process of getting your home sold in any market.

Lessons in Life & Love - Where was God?

2010-09-15T14:36:00.000-07:00

This is my second post in what will be a series of many posts I am sure as I am guaranteed to learn many lessons in life and love as time goes on. I am a teacher at heart and value learning very much. That said lessons learned in life and love often come with an amount of pain. Sometimes small and others times in doses that rival a tablespoon of caster oil. I have never taken a tablespoon of caster oil but I do recall seeing it happen on old cartoons such as "Our Gang". It looked unbearable. I have taken a tablespoon of flax seed oil and a tablespoon of fish oil and let me tell you they are not tasty in the least, yet somehow manageable when you think about the health benefits. Such are many lessons in life and love.

I was speaking with a new good friend of mine earlier this summer and she was asking me how my relationship with God was. I responded that I know and believe that God exists. I believe He sent his son to die so that I might live. I believe in my salvation and am confident that I am a child of God. And after that it gets a bit difficult. I have been through a lot in my life. When I first was dating Tom he often described me to his friends as someone who had lived a lot of life for someone of 29 years old. More than most people who are 40+. Unfortunately most of the living was not the kind that many dream of such as a life of exotic travel or volunteer work in far off places. No, most of it was at home struggling day after day to simply get through another day and hope that somehow tomorrow would be better.

Not a complete victim I take responsibility for the many choices that I made that led me down paths that were at times less than desirable. And some of those choices brought me together with one who himself made a lot choices that made life even more miserable and at times intolerable. It was during those years, 10 and a half in all, that I began to question if God truly loved me. I knew he loved me in the sense that his gift of forgiveness and salvation was open to even me, but did he love ME? If he did in fact love me as much as I was taught as a young child then why would he let me be repeatedly hurt sometimes daily by the one who was supposed to love me as Christ loved the church? Why would he ignore my daily cries for help, for peace, for patience and for understanding? Why wouldn't he bring me a brighter tomorrow?

After ten and half years my divorce was final and I began a new path in my life with just myself and my daughter. And here again I made choices that were not always the best, mostly for me and less for my daughter. Fortunately it only took me about 9 months to recognize and commit to my daughter being my first and most important priority. I found it easy to let it be known that she was mine, all mine. 24/7. 365 days a year. And nothing and no one would come in between that. I gave to her what I wanted to be given to me, love, attention, nurturing and caring guidance to assure her that she was my priority in life. She became my one true focus. With all of my focus on her I didn't have to think about what was still eating me away inside. Where was God when I was hurting? Where was he now?

Now 8 years later, my daughter is grown. She is starting her journey in college at a private university and I am so very happy for her. I have remarried a wonderful man who then adopted my daughter and became the father she longed for and we have added a son to our happy little family. Things are moving right along. And then this friend asks me that question and brings back to the surface that nagging question. How is my relationship with God? What? Do I really have to think about it? Wasn't it easier to just believe in God and know of my salvation? Isn't that enough? Do I really have to consider our relationship?

And so this summer I began to dig a little deeper. Cautiously, slowly asking myself where was God when I needed him most? Did he abandon me? Was he there and I just didn't know it, feel it? Was he there and I couldn't hear his answers? Through a few studies and much prayer this summer God has taken me on a journey to look back through my first marriage. I have avoided that like the plague. To think back brings up so much pain, anger and disappointment. It has always seemed that it would be easier to stay angry at my first husband than to forgive him. If I stop being angry, if I forgive him then who will hold him accountable for all that he did to us? I have realized that I was taking on the role of the judge and thinking that it was my job to make sure that all he did was not forgotten. And yet, I am learning that keeping it all alive is only hurting me. Does he know I am angry? Does he feel punished as I hold on to the pain, anger and hurt year after year? Who knows! Am I truly punishing him by holding on to it? No, because I cannot punish him. But I am punishing myself day after day and year after year for the choices I made and for his actions as well. The anger and the fear had a constant grip on me and was separating me from God. It kept me from seeking God, from being open to listen to God, and stifled some of my daily joy.

As I have begun to realize that God is there even in the deepest darkest valleys of our lives I have taken time to look back at my first marriage. I see some things a little differently than I have before. I see how God held me at times when I cried thinking I could not go on another day. He gave me the strength the next morning to get up and care for my daughter and myself and make it through yet another day. I see how he protected me when all I wanted to do was to die and he kept me alive. Here I thought he didn't protect me when I was getting hurt verbally and emotionally day after day, but he was protecting me from taking my own life. I see how God guided me when he showed me how to secure a job and a paycheck so that I could make a plan to leave. I see how he guided those around me to help me when I left to provide a safe place for my daughter and I to live affordably. I see how he blessed my daughter and I time and time again when we needed it. I see now that as I began to make choices that weren't always the best he was still there waiting for me to get back on the right track. I see how he helped me raise a daughter who makes far better choices than I did at 15, 16, 17 and so on. I see how he has blessed me now with a man who truly loves me and our children.

There has been many times when I have said that I pulled myself up by my own boot straps and got out of what was a difficult and painful situation. I see now that there were even bigger hands than mine guiding me as I put one foot in front of the other trying to move towards a better life for myself and my daughter. Although at times I couldn't hear his voice. And there were times that I truly doubted that he was even listening when I cried out. Looking back I see that he was there every moment of the way. I see it more clearly now. I see him more clearly now.

Today I am in a different place and going through a different kind of valley. My daughter is off at college and making her way through being homesick, my son is entering the place I did not originally believe existed called the terrible two's (his sister never had them), my husband and I have found that life is tough when I am not making a full time income, the stress level has risen in our lives as we make our way through this valley together. This morning I was reading and praying and the thought crept in that maybe God wasn't listening. I don't hear his answers right now. What if we make wrong choices? Does he really truly care about us? I knew the answer right away. Yes! God cares about me. He cared about me when I was hurting to the point that I wanted to die and he saved me from myself. He cared about me when I lay night after night crying and hoping for a better life for my daughter and he helped provide a way for that to be. And he cares about me now and will help guide my husband and I through this time in our lives as well. I believe he is there now just as he was long ago. Listening to me, waiting for me to rest in him. Waiting for me to trust that he will guide me. Waiting for me to take one step at a time.

Honestly, I am excited to see where we go from here. I read in my devotions this morning that God is there even in the darkest points of our lives. He is always our light. It doesn't mean we will never be in the dark, never go through times of darkness, but when we do we can know that he is there and we need only to look to the light to lead us out of the darkness. I don't know exactly how the next few days, weeks, months or years are going to go exactly. I don't know how long this valley will last. I don't know how often I will struggle to be patient and wait upon the Lord or how many times I will fall when trying to go my own way, but I know that no matter how often or how long he will be there ready to hold me, listen to me, guide me, and even carry me if need be.

All houses are worth $299,000.....

2010-09-09T22:08:00.000-07:00

Or so it seems. I am actually amazed myself at the number of buyers, and their brokers for that matter, that categorize homes in a very narrow category. It seems we have homes worth under $300,000 and then of course the sporadic high end home worth getting a jumbo loan for. The national media has in fact prevailed and the housing market has in fact moved to lower, middle and upper class pricing. And as is true in many other areas when divided into these three classes the middle class doesn't really exist. We are a society of lower and upper class living. It also seems that no matter how much research is done and how many comparables are found and presented, when a home is listed everyone looking thinks it is over priced by at least $30,000 if not more.

Market Values are indeed skewed by the increased amount of short sale and foreclosure bank owned homes that have flooded the market even in the greater Seattle area. These homes are listed well below market value to scream "I am an amazing deal" to buyers looking for a good deal. Bank owned homes are the worst. They are listed well below market value in hopes of attracting multiple offers to get the highest and best price as they call it. Their way of having an auction without it being called an auction. Short sales and Bank Owned homes come with their own issues and thus discourage many buyers. And yet, these same buyers go look at other homes that are not short sale or bank owned homes and do not come with the headaches of their red headed step child cousins, yet the buyers want the same low prices they would be paying for short sale and bank owned homes. Talk about wanting your cake and eating it too! And when they submit a low offer to a seller and that seller counters back at a reasonable market value they walk away.

I have sold short sales and written offers on bank owned homes for clients who are looking for a great deal. If you have the time, patience and knowledge of home ownership you can get a great deal on some of these properties. That said I am not against getting an amazing deal. On the other hand I think people need to wake up to reality that not all homes are short sale or bank owned. Some are in better condition and justify a price over $299,000. You do get what you pay for. There is value in a home where the owner has maintained, cared for and upgraded items in and outside of the home. There is value in working out the details with a home owner (a real person) who is still invested in the sale of the home (their equity).

We are currently in an ever changing market. The good news is this, interest rates are low. The lowest they have been in a very long time. Prices are low. And Mortgages are available to those who can afford the monthly payment, have good credit, and have good employment history. (Please don't go changing jobs while you are trying to buy a home.)

Contrary to popular belief I do not agree that all homes are worth less than $300,000 nor do I believe that all homes are over priced.

Where did it go?

2010-08-25T19:01:00.000-07:00

I could ask where the month went but I really need to ask where the year has gone? Is it really almost the end of August and the end of summer? I can't believe Labor Day weekend is around the corner just a short week away.

If I take time to recount what happened this year it is not actually surprising that it went by so quickly. From scholarship competitions for our girl, to Senior sports nights and graduation, and finally seeing her off to college just last week, all in all it made for a highly productive year. And those are just the events that revolved around the girl. I could add in all of the amazing milestones of our two year old, two rental vacancies with major clean up and repairs/remodeling, one of which is now re-rented and the other almost ready to go on the market for sale, and the year would easily look like it could have been long. Each event seemed to roll into, over, or through another making for a whirlwind 8 months. I find myself longing for winter, a time to hibernate and do nothing. Oh, how glorious the word nothing.

In between it all I have listed 9 houses this year and worked with several buyers as well. Sometimes wondering where the time came from and thankful that it showed up. Adding a team member in late July has been one of the best decisions we have made. It has been glorious to work with Keith and I am looking forward to continuing the team relationship! I also look forward to the day when Tom can work in real estate again. The market will determine how soon that happens.

As I said I am looking forward to Winter. Cool days and cold nights that encourage hot meals, books read by the fire, long movies and snuggles with my honey. Sounds divine!

Maybe he will play drums in a marching band....

2010-08-03T18:15:00.000-07:00

Michael told me one night as I rocked him in the rocking chair, "Probably when I grow up I'm going to be a drummer. In a marching band." I laughed and said, "Okay!" Well, ever since we went to the Torch Light parade his love for drums has only increased and his obsession with marching is ten fold. This morning I found a way to make his dream come true......

Another 4th of July at the Reddy House - 2010

2010-07-30T22:38:00.000-07:00

This year was only slightly different then the past few years. We had new friends added to the old ones, a toddler who stayed awake for it all, a child that fell into the lake (this seems to be a recurring event lately....) and as always a lot of fun!

Just how progressive are we really?

2010-07-20T15:20:00.000-07:00

Unfortunately I do not have a huge amount of time to write today, but this topic has been on my mind for quite a while now. The Bachelor/Bachelorette Show. No, I am not a regular viewer. There are times when I am on my elliptical that I tune in as I am too busy to flip channels or I happen to see a brief commercial about the show when I am watching something else. Recently when I saw the commercial while sweating profusely on my elliptical a thought dawned on me. I do not believe (and you can correct me if I am wrong) that there has yet been an African American Bachelor or Bachelorette for this show. In fact, I am not sure there has been anything other than white (Caucasian) bachelor or bachelorettes on this 'current' reality TV show. Am I wrong? If I am right, then just how progressive are we really? Haven't we come to a place where the lead 'role' if you will on what is supposed to be Reality TV can reflect what is in reality a diverse culture that we live in? Isn't America made up of many different cultures?

.....Okay, I must run for now. I will try to follow up with more thoughts in the future. Please feel free to chime in on the subject.......

JLS ENews "Kudos!"

2010-07-16T11:17:00.000-07:00

June 8, 2010
Kudos & Congratulations

JLS Bainbridge Island Manager Vicki Browning, took the reign as President of the Bainbridge Rotary Club on July 5. Rotary is an international service organization made up of volunteers who want to make the world a better place. Way to go, Vicki!

"I lucked out! Dave Marzolf (Everett) has been the best agent I ever used. Patient and allowing during my frustrations at deciding what and where I really wanted to live. Even through three written agreements that I decided to get out of, he never let go and stayed in constant communication, jumping on whatever needed to be done immediately. Thank you!”

“Just a quick note to acknowledge Angelina Wallent (Redmond, WA) for all her efforts in attempting to find a home for us since our relocation to the US. Although we have yet to find what we are looking for, her continued patience, support, and understanding (as we better understand the market and our respective requirements) has been nothing short of amazing. She is professional, responsive, and has our best interest in mind at all times. We are lucky to have her represent us.”

“I enjoyed the relaxed, yet professional approach that Kristi Lyn Reddy (Seattle Center) took while going through the overview of the buying process. She answered all of my questions quickly and informatively. I've explained some of my constraints and not only was she not intimidated by them but gave me the confidence that we will be able to manage the process efficiently. Her attention to detail also included incorporating my cultural preferences and quirks, which is always important for someone from out of country. Overall, I was very impressed with Kristi Lyn's all-around excellence and how she helped me get an apartment (condo) I wanted and with a myriad of constraints I had coming in. I would recommend her in any scenario in a heartbeat!”

“We could not have been happier with any agent than we were with Jerry Ehlers (Medford). He listened to what we wanted and adjusted the places he showed us based upon our comments of each place we saw. We were able to find our ‘dream’ home in just one weekend of looking.”

“From beginning to end Kris Murphy and Daniela Dombrowski’s (University Village) professionalism and attention to detail was obvious. Their homework on pricing made a huge difference in the selling price, and the evidence they provided to support their price was so detailed and well-explained that we had great confidence in their recommendation. Their pricing was well above other agents’ that we interviewed—and the sale price proved they were correct. Without them we would have seriously underpriced our home! Fortunate are the sellers who list with Kris and Daniela, and we are sure buyers who engage them to find their dream home would be fortunate as well!”

“Tom and I just wanted to thank you, Paul McLaughlin (University Village), for your professionalism and diligence to see our real estate transaction through. I know it wasn’t easy and I think many agents would have thrown their hands up in frustration….but not you. Your coaching the listing agent through the negotiations was brilliant! You have exceeded our expectations throughout this business transaction and we want to let you know how much we appreciate it.”

“With the help and persistence of Jana Orr (Port Orchard), our sale went through. You have a true and dedicated real estate agent. Not only is Jana understanding, she is also to the point with kindness. That’s a special quality. She knows what she’s doing and has no problem asking for help when needed. And most important, she keeps her clients informed and explains the paperwork more than once. She kept our hopes of a sale, even when everything seemed against us.”

“We really love working with Jennifer Fetterplace (Port Orchard) and can’t wait to work with her in the future. Jennifer is a great agent and makes buying and selling look easy! We love her.”

“I commend Eric Von Marbod (Port Orchard) for his exemplary service in assisting me in both this and my previous purchase. He went well above what the average agent normally provides. Thank you!”

“We are so happy that we had Beth Allen (Port Orchard) as our agent. She was very professional and knowledgeable. We highly recommend her.”

“As it turned out, we had a very challenging piece of property to sell. Throughout the process, Cheryl Castagna (Kent) helped us address each issue that came up and helped us to keep moving forward with the sale. Their expertise and guidance were invaluable. Cheryl really went the extra mile when she baked blueberry muffins and held an open house for the Maple Valley Historical Society. I have much admiration for her.”

“Bruce Burns (Kent) is the most caring, most thorough real estate agent I have ever had the privilege of knowing. He always went above and beyond the required duty, even though this purchase was small in comparison to most of his business. (This was a mobile home.) Since I as out of state and unable to literally see the property, Mr. Burns very efficiently described it to me via the internet. I asked him to treat me like he would if it was his own mother he was working for and he certainly did just that. I couldn’t be happier with anyone else’s assistance. I will gladly refer him to anyone who needs an honest, kind, and efficient REALTOR®.”

“Jodie Weir (Kent) went above and beyond to help me during this process. I am very grateful. She is the best and has always treated me with respect, honestly, and laughter.”

“What a blessing! Bruce Burns (Kent), you are an extraordinary REALTOR®! At this point, I think we have to consider you as a friend. It is a real joy to meet a person like you is very genuine. You really do keep your word!”

“Marti Reeder (Kent) provided excellent service during a market period that could have proven very problematic. She used strong, innovative marketing and great follow-through with all potential buyers and agents. Mari was the listing agent but also located the eventual buyer. As issues came up during the negotiations and closing, she was always present and open to ideas and solutions to move the deal forward. I would enthusiastically recommend Marti.”

“Rebecca Alloway (Kent) is excellent! She is one of the most talented people I have met. Very artistic—excellent at staging. Very skillful negotiator. Very detailed and thorough. I loved how she kept me informed every step of the way. Thank you!”

“Linda O’Connell (Kent) was wonderful in helping us find the perfect house. We couldn’t be happier.”

“Jill Trinh (Kent) is the best! This sale would not have closed if any other agent was working on this for me.”

“Todd Reitan (Kent) is awesome. We will recommend him and use him again.”

“We are in the process of being relocated from Indiana to Oregon. The relocation company paired us with Sara Kiley (Eugene). From the first time we were contacted, Sara has done nothing short of an amazing job for us. She has gone over and above what we expected and has repeatedly gone out of her way to provide us the best possible experience in buying a new home. Never before have we had the pleasure of working with an individual who truly enjoys their job the way Sara does. We have also never worked with an agent better than Sara, and we plan to recommend her to everyone who moves to this area. We have sent a note to the relocation company recommending that they use Sara for any relocation that they do to the Eugene-Springfield area.”

“Thank you, Michael Billings (Redmond, WA), for an amazing job to help us purchase our new home. Your patience, understanding, support, follow-ups, communication, and most of all your knowledge and experience were noteworthy.”

“Meeting you, John Walsh (West Hills), a few months ago was an unexpected surprise, but it couldn’t have turned out better! Even though the process had a few bumps, we love the house and are very excited to settle into our first home! We can’t thank you enough for all your help.”

“I can’t thank you, Jane Garcia (Scappoose), enough for all of your hard work helping me find the house. What a process! I think I might have lost my mind if you hadn’t been there every step of the way. I met a few other agents early on and they pale in comparison. You’re the best!”

A Little Pomp & Circumstance

2010-07-06T15:39:00.000-07:00

We are unbelievably proud of our daughter, Laurie Ann. I know I boast of her often on this blog and quite frankly she deserves it! I don't know a single parent who wouldn't love to show a glowing report of their child's accomplishments given the chance. And we can't help that our girl is absolutely amazing time and time again.

It has taken me a little longer than expected to sit down here at this slow beast of a computer and upload the photos from her graduation ceremony and after party. The day was beautiful however the evening got a wee bit chilly and we even experienced a rain shower before the ceremony began. Thankfully the clouds held the flow of water and God spared us all from a good drenching as we sat outdoors in the bleachers at Ingraham High School on June 14, 2010.

The morning of graduation the Seniors all met at Salty's on Alki for breakfast before heading back to the school for rehearsal. I had the pleasure of curling my girl's hair and helping her choose her outfit to wear. You might recognize the dress if you have ever taken a look at my wedding photos. I wore it for our reception. It's simply beautiful and she looks great in blue! Laurie looked stunning and on top of it she was glowing and she headed out the door to pick up her friends. Yes, she was driving.

After rehearsal she had some time to hang out with her friends and then relax until it was time to head back to the school for Graduation. Laurie was her typical bubbly self all giddy with excitement. Her grandparents, Don and Carole, met us at our house and got to see her as she was getting ready to head out the door. Grandma journalized the entire event with moment by moment pictures. Laurie loving every moment of the attention!

The ceremony was wonderful. It was great to see many of the kids we have come to know over the past 4 years all graduate together. One of Laurie's friends, Nicole Prothro, sang a beautiful song. That girl can sing! She of course is heading to NYU this fall majoring in something musical. Nicole not only has spent a lot of time at our home but she went to the hospital with us the night I went into labor with Michael. She is his unofficial other sister. It was a joy to watch Laurie walk to her seat for the ceremony and know that my little munchkin is all grown up. Laurie has exceeded above and beyond what I could hope for and I am so very proud of her.

After graduation we headed back to our house to eat. We were going to tailgate at the school until time to go to the all night party but it was FREEZING out! Around 9:00PM Laurie and I headed back to the school to catch the bus for the Grad Party. My girl wanted me to come along and chaperon the party. I don't if she asked because she knew I would have a great time. Or if she really wanted me there, but nevertheless I am thankful for the experience. It was fun to participate and observe the kids having one last night of fun before heading off into the real world of either jobs or college. I got to meet some new kids and catch up with some of the ones I already know. It was fun to watch my daughter running around with her classmates, being silly and having a good time. It is a memory I will cherish for years to come.

Cheers to Laurie and all of the 2010 Ingraham High Graduates! (Photos below....)

Extension to Tax Credit Passed

2010-07-01T09:15:00.001-07:00

Last night, the Senate passed the National Flood Insurance Program Extension Act of 2010 (H.R. 5569), an extension of the National Flood Insurance Program until September 30, 2010. This will allow transactions to move forward. The bill is retroactive and covers the lapse period from June 1, 2010, to the date of enactment of the extension. NAR members sent more than 250,000 letters to Members of Congress encouraging them to extend the program.
Additionally, Congress passed an extension of the closing deadline for the Homebuyer Tax Credit, the Homebuyer Assistance and Improvement Act (H.R. 5623). The extension applies only to transactions that have ratified contracts in place as of April 30, 2010, that have not yet closed. The legislation is designed to create a seamless extension; the new closing deadline for eligible transactions is now September 30, 2010. There will be no gap between June 30 and the date the President signs the bill into law. Extending the tax credit closing deadline will help provide additional stability to real estate markets across the nation.

Update on Tax Credit Extension for Closing

2010-06-30T13:02:00.000-07:00

Special Update: Not passed yet, not sure if it will, but I’m hoping…

Yesterday, the House passed HR 5623 by an overwhelming margin of 409 to 5. This bill would extend the "close-by" deadline for the home buyer tax credit to September 30. The Senate still must approve the measure before President Obama can sign it into law. Senate leaders announced that they are working on a similar bill on which to vote. As a stand-alone bill, the extension appears to have the broad support needed to pass.

Valuable Information on Current Tax Credit - Expires 6/30

2010-06-25T14:56:00.000-07:00

Home buyer Tax Credit Eligible Loans: Submit Conditions by Close of Business on Friday, June 25

Any loans eligible for the first-time home buyer or the repeat home buyer tax credits must close by June 30, 2010. To meet that deadline, please submit all of your conditions for any purchase loans with a close date of June 30 that are “approved with conditions” by close of business tomorrow, June 25.

Note: Congress is considering a bill to extend the deadline for closing to Sept. 30, 2010, but the bill has not yet passed the House.

Additional Resources:
• Borrowers should be advised to consult with their tax advisor regarding the tax credits.
• It is the borrower’s responsibility to confirm if he/she qualifies for the tax credit following the IRS income limits and/or first-time home buyer tests. Complete information is available on IRS Form 5405.
• Borrowers must claim the tax credit on their Federal income tax return. Specifically, they should complete IRS Form 5405 to determine their tax credit amount. Although Form 5405 is titled “First-Time Home buyer Credit,” it is the correct form for claiming both the $8,000 first-time home buyer tax credit and $6,500 repeat buyer tax credit.

Closing Extension for Tax Credit

2010-06-16T16:03:00.000-07:00

Word is in that the Senate will be extending the closing date for the Tax Credit. You must already be in contract as the initial deadline for being in contract was April 30th and that is not changing. The closing deadline was June 30, 2010 and it looks as though that is going to be extended. Good news for those buyers and sellers who are currently in limbo for one reason or another and are unable to close by the original deadline. I will post more as it is finalized.

John L Scott ENews - Kudos

2010-06-10T16:24:00.000-07:00

I just learned today that I was included in the John L Scott ENews edition this month. Apparantly a client that I am working with sent feedback to the company about their experience working with me. Made my day!

If you click on the title of this blog post it will take you to the page. Scroll down about halfway and you will see my name in bold (Kristi Reddy).

I truly appreciate my clients feedback!

Lessons in Life and Love

2010-06-10T08:50:00.000-07:00

I would say I have been around the block a few times. Having been raised in what would be considered a strong and stable environment with two parents in a lifelong committed relationship and a christian home (that in and of itself holds so many life truths and mistruths) one would think I was handed the easy life. I went to a private school in a small town from K through second grade. From there I went to the local public school of the same small town through High School. For the first 10 or so years of my life my grandma lived literally down the street and around the corner from my childhood home. Grandma's home was my home away from home, full of love, hot meals, and at times peace and quiet. And while I would agree that my life has been a far cry from poverty, homelessness, or disadvantaged such that could set a child up for failure from the beginning, I have had my fair share of trials, struggles and setbacks along the way.

Looking back I can see many of the lessons that I have learned along the way and many that I am still figuring out even now as an adult. The saying "If only I had known then what I know now" is one that runs through my mind time and time again. If only there was a manual on life not only for parents in raising children but for the individual to learn some of life's most profound and yet painful lessons without the necessity of going through the experience of the lesson itself. Of course I do not believe that learning from a book would produce the same result of a life changing lesson which ultimately can mold and shape the character of a person. It would, however be nice to avoid some of the pain that goes along with these lessons.

One of the greatest lessons I have learned as a parent is the astounding benefit of letting my children know that even I, the parent, make mistakes. That while I make decisions in their best interest and for their well being, I too at times am wrong. I try to openly admit my mistakes to my children. Definitely not the easiest nor the most fun thing to do. Who likes to admit they are wrong? My ego prefers to be right all of the time. My ego absolutely does not want to be wrong. If I am wrong it would rather I justify my actions by the err spoken, "Because I am the parent mister" then to be humbled and in my ego's opinion embarrassed by admitting that I, the parent, the Lord over all beings we call children that belong to me, was in fact wrong. I believe it is in being open and honest with my children that they then will trust me enough to be open and honest with me. Our relationship is better served by an open door policy then by an inflated ego. It only took me about 14 years or so to start to get this and begin to tell Laurie who was 14 at the time that I am new at being the parent of a 14 year old and next year I would be new at being the parent of a 15 year old and would more than likely make mistakes. My only hope was that through my mistakes she and I would learn and grow together.

Telling my daughter that I am wrong has never been easy. Have you ever went to someone and openly admitted your mistake asking for forgiveness? Swallowing your pride just may be more difficult than swallowing a worm or eating cooked liver (what was my mother thinking???). And yet, once admitted the amazing feeling of relief far outweighs the burden of pretending that I am perfect and right simply because I was the parent. If only I could remember this amazing feeling when I am in the midst of holding onto my false sense of perfection.

I am now a parent for the first time of an 18 year old who is graduating high school and enrolling in college. This too will be full of lessons for me as well as many for Laurie. I am sure I will make a mistake or two. I find comfort that my daughter will still love me and be there to listen as I share my mistakes and lessons with her and she shares hers with me. I am also once again the parent of a 2 year old. Unfortunately I do not have a handbook on this stage of life even though I have already raised one child. This time is altogether different for now I am parent for the first time of a 2 year old BOY. I know it will be different and I know I will make mistakes. The one lesson I can carry with me into this new stage of life is to share my mistakes and imperfections even earlier in hopes that my son will also benefit from the bond I believe an open door policy creates. One where we all learn and grow together with the understanding that no one is perfect but love is unconditional in this house.

On a scale of 1 to 10 this lesson is probably a 5. Moderately uncomfortable on the verge of at times being painful and yet in the grand scheme of life lessons it is not ER or 9-1-1 worthy. I suppose it is one of the easier ones to share as I think about writing out some of my life and love lessons. A starting point if you will. Why am sharing these? Isn't a blog in a way a glorified journal? One that you hope others will find and pour through reading your at times most personal thoughts. An open window into the writer's life as they expose who they are, what they think, even what they believe with a slight hope that others, someone will agree with them? I suppose for some a BLOG is their soap box, the platform they can stand on and shout for as long and as loud as they desire about anything and everything or nothing at all. No one can actually shut them up or take their microphone away, but they can 'turn the channel' and stop reading if they so choose. My Blog began as a real estate blog and then transformed into a place where I share and shamelessly brag about my children and my husband. And then there are times my Blog takes a slight detour into some writings that often run through my mind in an effort to reach paper as I dream of one day writing a book about something, anything or nothing. And so, Lessons in Life and Love may appear from time to time as I reflect on what I have and am learning day in and day out.

Word to the Wise

2010-06-01T15:08:00.000-07:00

Recently our teenage daughter was driving in the North Seattle area on a midweek evening just after 10:00 PM. A friend had texted her to say he had ran out of gas and wondered if we had a gas can he could borrow. He was going to walk to our home to get it and then return it but we suggested she simply drive to him, get the gas, and thus bring our gas can home. As you know, when someone borrows a gas can it very rarely is actually returned. Having been burned by this one in the past we decided it would be better to send our daughter out into the night then trust the safe return of our gas can. After getting the gas can filled they were headed back to his car. Sitting at a light on 125th Street and Aurora Ave N they were chatting while waiting for the light to turn green. Suddenly Laurie's door swing open and someone yelled, "Get the F**K out of the car!" Laurie turned to see a large black woman standing there holding her door open. Laurie thought to herself that the woman looked high. She then looked at the woman's hands. One was holding the door and the other was in plain site and empty. Laurie looked at her and yelled, "WHAT THE F**K ARE YOU DOING?" The woman said, "I'm sorry. Thought you were someone else." And quickly walked away leaving Laurie's car door open. Phew! Scary, shocking, and unbelievable! Laurie was more than rattled. When she shared this with me the next morning I couldn't help but remember (after noting that my daughter was home and safe) that she was the one who told me that you are supposed to lock your doors upon getting into your car even before you put your seat belt on. Laurie said this will of course be her plan from now on. Uh, mine too! Odd she said she always locks her doors when in certain neighborhoods or downtown, but just figured she was so close to home she didn't think about it. Car jacking can happen anywhere, no matter where you live. Word to the wise, if you do not have auto locks in your car then please get in the habit of locking your doors when you get into your car.

Pessimist or Staunch Realist?

2010-05-19T14:21:00.000-07:00

Have you ever been called a Debbie Downer? (My apologies to all of the Debbie's out there.) We all know at least one. The person who no matter how good life is can always find something to complain about. They have a good job making $100,000 annually with a corner office boasting a 180 degree view of the water and the mountains and yet they can't stop talking about what a horrible parking space they have in the company paid for garage. Or the one who is a size 4 shortly after giving birth to twins and whose babies already sleep through the night but she complains that her hair is starting to go grey. Please! Or maybe it's your friend with the beautiful wife, nice car, spacious home, good job and all he does is gripe about the moss in his lawn, the paper boy who leaves the newspaper on the bottom step, and how the waitress forgot the lemon for his water for Pete's sake! (Sorry Pete) I must admit that I am realizing that I complain a lot. Typically about little things and at times endlessly about the bigger things. It's as though I think if I stop complaining the offense will somehow go unnoticed and I, the victim, will not receive retribution for the infraction no matter how big or small it was.

Some might call a constant complainer a Pessimist. Websters Dictionary - Pessimist: One who has a tendency to stress the negative or unfavorable or to take the gloomiest possible view. I suppose if one always pointed out the negative side you would begin to think that is all they see. I think all too often when a person is a realist and tends to point out what logically will or will not work they are viewed as a pessimist. Just as one who has high and lofty goals could be called a dreamer. And yet, their dreams may be completely reachable with proper planning and a dose of good hard work! Looking on the bright side has its worth. I can't imagine a life without joy and happiness. And yet one who is always positive could come across as fake. An optimist is often referred to as a Pollyanna, a dreamer or an idealist. It seems to me we loosely throw around terms like pessimist, optimist, dreamer, failure, realist, free-bird based solely on a small perspective of a person's life rather than a complete over-all view of their life as a whole and the circumstances around which their current actions are driven. I think about raising children and how many times I hear kids labeled as talkative, rambunctious, impatient, lazy, loud..... And I think what else the kids may actually be such as articulate, active, pro-active, patient or thoughtful, out-spoken, all of which are simply a positive twist on the afore mentioned negative labels.

The next to find yourself throwing a label on the Debbie-downer in the room take moment to assess the situation. Is she really being a downer (and she may very well be to which I would turn to her and politely suggest she count her blessings) or is she merely pointing out the reality of the situation at hand. As for complaining, yeah, I need to work on that one.

Buyers - What to Do and What Not to Do

2010-05-18T15:07:00.000-07:00

Home shopping is actually quite fun when buyers are informed and able to move through the process with their eyes wide open. Honestly it starts with the basics. Just like in elementary school people are always looking for short cuts, ways to get to the good stuff without the need for taking care of the details first. Unfortunately most of us learned the hard way that in the end this only makes it more difficult. Remember long division? I do. In fact I also remember teaching to my daughter. Laurie is one of those people who is able to do math in her head without the need for scratch paper. Lucky her! She was able to look at a problem and simply tell you the answer. The part she struggled at was showing her work. Whether for lack of ability or for simply not wanting to take the time, she didn't do it. This became a point of contention for her when she entered public school as her teacher consistently marked her down and lowered her grade on papers and tests for not showing her work. Laurie believed the steps did not matter as long as the outcome was correct. And this very well may be true, except for the fact that the directions said to 'Show you work'. Thus making it a gradable step. For those of us who need to do the steps in order to get the answer we learned it is very important to follow the instructions and do them in the proper order to gain the desired outcome, a correct answer.

What To Do:

In order to have the joy of finding just the right home to purchase one must first follow the steps to obtaining approval to make that purchase. Also known as mortgage approval or being 'Pre Approved'. Getting pre approved is fairly easy and actually painless. I have a list that I give our clients at a buyers appointment which lays out the items the lender will need to see in order to process your request for approval. They include:

Income:
Paycheck Stubs (last 30 days)
W-2 forms for the past two years
If self-employed, previous two years tax returns
Other income information if applicable: child support, retirement, social security, etc.
Start date of current employment (must cover 24 months history)

Assets:
Bank Statements (last two months, include all pages for both business and personal)
Two months statements of liquid assets (investment portfolio: stocks, money market, 401K, SEP, etc.)

Other Information:
Residence History (last two years including dates)
Landlord History (address and phone for last two years)
Date of birth (all borrowers)

Once you have your loan pre approval you can begin your search for homes that fit the mortgage and payment amount that you are comfortable with. Why look at homes before you know what you can afford to buy? It can be very disappointing to be looking at homes priced in the $300,000 to $350,000 only to find out that you qualify for $275,000 and will more than likely be purchasing a town home or condo rather than a residential home. It can be equally discouraging to be looking under budget depending on the neighborhood you desire to love in. Best to get approved first and then start searching!

It is also a good idea to maintain open communication with your Realtor and your Loan Officer. Tell them everything! What you like, don't like, what you know and what you don't know. If you have a question, ask it! The only stupid question is the one you didn't ask. Your Realtor and your Loan Officer want to help you be informed throughout the entire home buying process.

While searching for homes many buyers catch the bug! The shopping bug that is. As they began to realize that their new home will need a few more things than they currently have such as new curtains or perhaps new blinds, maybe a new washer and dryer or refrigerator, they began to start looking online and at local stores in their free time. While it never hurts to look and is a great idea to start gathering information and pricing so as to plan for your new home it is best to stay clear of making any purchases while home shopping. Every time you access your credit file to apply for a credit card, loan, or make what may seem as insignificant changes to your credit card balances your FICO score changes. If you make a purchase on a department store card such as Sears it can greatly effect your FICO score and it may actually change your ability to get a loan or at minimum change the interest rate that you qualify for. Some buyers are surprised shortly before closing when they are informed they no longer qualify for their mortgage due to changes in the credit report.

What NOT to do:

Make purchases on your credit cards
Apply for new credit cards or lines of credit
Apply for an Auto loan
Make larger than normal payments to your current credit cards or lines of credit (pay off entire balances, yes even paying things off can have a negative affect). If in question ask your loan officer before making a payment.
Absolutely do NOT change your job!

Many buyers think once they are past the approval process, have made an offer on their new home, have made it through the inspection and appraisal process, that they are home free until closing. Hopefully, this is the case. Lending guidelines have changed drastically over the past 2 years. One step that has been added much to many people's surprise when uninformed is a day before or day of closing phone call to verify employment. The underwriter or processor makes the call. If they are told you no longer work for the company you specified on your application your loan cannot be funded. Imagine your surprise (and your agent's) when you are called the day of closing and told you are not purchasing a home today. If you are in the process of changing jobs wait to purchase a home after the change as long as it is in the same industry you currently work in and for the same or higher pay. If you will be changing job profession entirely you may need 1-2 years on the new job before obtaining a loan. If that is the case you may want to hold off on your job change until after you have closed on your new home if at all possible.

Many underwriters also run a last minute credit report to see if there are any changes there as well. Throughout the final days before closing many buyers are asked for additional documentation to verify down payment funds, sources, employment, rental or investment information. This is different for every buyer. Be prepared to provide whatever is requested as quickly as possible in order to help your loan process flow as smoothly as possible. The quicker they have the information the sooner conditions can be met and your loan documents can be delivered to escrow for signing.

Ultimately if you are uncertain about what to do or not to do during the home buying process don't hesitate to ask your Realtor. That is what we are here for!

Only 14 left......

2010-05-13T21:48:00.000-07:00

Only 14 more weekends until my little girl who is all grown up is leaving for college. I am going to miss the heck out of her. I try not to let it show. I am an old pro at the 'stiff upper lip'. I can hide my emotions under the rug better than anybody. Honestly, I am so proud of who she has become and completely excited to see where her life is going that I am thrilled she is going to University. I know I am one of the luckiest moms around since my daughter is staying in state for school and will be only an hour and a half away from home. It just won't be the same around the house. I will miss her constant hugs, snuggling on the couch reading a book together, baking cupcakes together, her running errands with me just to be with me, playing cards, and family dinners together many nights a week. Even with Michael's constant chatter I know it is going to be somehow quieter with the girl gone. I am going to try to get the most out of the next 14 weekends cherishing each and every moment with my girl.

May Day May Day!

2010-05-04T21:26:00.001-07:00

Woah! I really can't believe that it is May 2010 already. Where the heck has this year gone? Winter is over, somebody please tell the weather it's time to get warm again. Spring is well under way, at least that is what I gather from posts on facebook about garden vegetables starting to sprout. Valentine's are past, the Easter bunny has hopped through the yard and well, Mother's Day is nearly here. Still a weird one for me. Everytime someone asks me what I want to do for Mother's Day I have to bite my tongue. What do I want to say? I want to spend the day with my Mother. I can actually still picture my mom on her last Mother's Day. I can see her on her couch in her living room. Her hair was a little messy as she had been sleeping a lot. I found out later she had been suffering from headaches. And to think we almost didn't go see her that day. I didn't want to bother her as I knew she had been struggling a bit with the after affects of her chemo. I remember I called her and said if she wasn't up for company I would understand. She told us to come on up bit not expect anything fancy as she was lounging in her jammies. I told her we would bring dinner and she wanted a burger from Burger King. A whopper with cheese please. And so that is what we brought her along with some roses and a card. I still have the card. It's in the trunk where she kept all of the cards that I and my daughter had given her. There are cards in there from my dad to her too. Pictures I drew as a kid amongst other items she saved over the years. I am so glad we went up there that day to see her. I had no idea it would be the last Mother's Day I would get to spend with my mom. But I digress.....

May is here and before we know it summer will be fast approaching. Time to get outside and do a little hiking, biking, swimming, playing, what have you. I can't wait! Stop worrying about time lost and start enjoying the time you have. You never know when it will be the last time you enjoy something or someone.

29 Hour Getaway

2010-04-26T13:45:00.001-07:00

What would you do if you only had 29 hours? Not to live, but 29 hours to get away from it all, from work, from household chores, from the children and all the responsibilities that they entail. Twenty nine hours isn’t all that much time but when planned out just right can be just what you need to feel refreshed, rejuvenated and ready to come back to reality, at least for a little while. It’s amazing what you can accomplish with a little strategic planning coupled with sheer determination.
A few months ago I called our friend, Donna Gallaugher, and shared my plight. I love my family, each and every one of them. My husband, the sweet loving man that he is helps out around the house in addition to working and bringing home the bacon. The self deemed laundry boy does more than his fair share. Our daughter Laurie, God love her, is the best teenager a parent could dream for. I can’t say hope for because she fulfills far beyond our hopes. I rarely have to remind her to do her chores and she often offers to watch her brother in addition to the already scheduled mom and dad date night time. I complain now and then when she acts like a real teenager, boggles my mind how few and far between those moments are (not my complaining, her acting like a typical teenager!). Then there is little Michael, my sweetie boy. I can just hear his little voice as he runs behind the couch yelling, “Sweetie boy come back! Come back Sweetie boy!!” It is a game we play and he loves for me to say this to him over and over again as he teases me that he will not come out for a hug. Such innocent joy flows from this little man. What a beautiful picture, right? Yes, it is. And yet, along with the love and the joy comes the stresses of life. Those moments when everyone needs mom to listen to them right now. The days when my cell phone is ringing, the e-mails need to be answered, research needs to be done, Michael wants to play and he is hungry and his diaper stinks. Laurie wants to share what happened at school or which ‘big brother’ she is beefing with currently and why. And Tom, well he wants to know what is for dinner or if I was able to pick up the mail today. Sometimes there are days where it seems there simply isn’t enough time to do all that needs to be done. It is on those days that I think of the old commercial, Calgon take me away! After a few weeks of what seemed like these kinds of days over and over again, I called Donna and told her that I needed 24 hours away with my husband. Not just a date night, but a morning where we did not have to get out of bed to fix anyone breakfast. 24 hours of just us. No work, no phones (okay…I checked e-mail), no computers, no children. Donna heard my cry and agreed to stay with our children so that Tom and I could go away. Donna and Glen would arrive at about 3:30 PM if we could be home by 4:00 the following day. We would have 24 hours of freedom!
With 24 hours on my hands I started the planning. Where could we go? What could we do? We could take a drive and look at houses in other areas and find a place to stay overnight. A silly past time we enjoy doing. Or we could go downtown Seattle and get a hotel room and enjoy a nice dinner out. We didn’t want to drive far as that would eat up precious time in our 24 hour getaway. As the planning began I quickly realized 24 hours really wasn’t that much when you figured in driving to and from your destination, sleep time, eating time, and whatever activity you want to embark upon. I began to negotiate more time. Fortunately for us our daughter’s school was having the WASL testing that week and thus school days were shortened. She determined that she could miss school Thursday and it would not be detrimental to her grades or delay her from graduating in June. Laurie said she would watch her brother until Donna and Glen arrived if we wanted to leave a bit earlier. We decided to leave at 11:00 AM and said we would return by 4:00 the following afternoon. We now had 29 hours to work with.
Still not wanting to waste a lot of time driving we were looking into local places. We searched out B&B’s up north in La Conner, Anacortes, Whidbey Island, and the likes. Lots of nice places, but it seemed silly to pay $200+ for one night. And many places had a two night minimum. I remembered that Tom and I both wanted to do some clothes shopping. I like having Tom with me when I am shopping to put in his 2 cents worth on what I am buying (and I am not referring to him paying for my clothes but offering his opinion. Honestly, I would let the man do all of my shopping for me. He does a better job at picking out clothes for me than I do). We keep saying we are going to go up to the Seattle Outlet Mall, which is nowhere near being in Seattle, but I digress. We haven’t been up there in about 4 years. Then we remembered that Tom’s class reunion will be at the Tulalip Casino Resort this summer and we thought we should check out the hotel. We looked into the rooms online and found that they were $185 per night. Yikes! Even logging into our AAA account didn’t provide a discount worth mentioning. I suggested that Tom call and talk to someone at the hotel and mention we have an AAA membership and need a room for one night. You never know, maybe they would give us a better deal. Tom did his thing and I was surprised to hear when he got off the phone that we had a King Suite at the Tulalip Resort for $130 for one night! Not bad at all. The lady on the phone asked my husband if we were celebrating a special occasion. Tom told her that we had a two year old and his wife needed a night away. Enough said. She must have been a mom too. There would be little time wasted on driving to our destination.
It was a beautiful day on the Thursday that we went. We arrived at the Tulalip Resort and Casino in the early afternoon. Checked into our room and headed up the elevator to check it out. The room was gorgeous! Nicest room I have ever stayed in actually. Made me wonder what their larger suites looked like. We forgot to check that out actually. Our room had rich dark wood trim and furniture throughout. There was a coffee and bar area with a Krueger one cup coffee maker. Not a huge coffee drinker myself but decided I would try it out in the morning. They even had wine glasses and a wine bottle opener on a nice glass shelf above the coffee area. A very nice touch if you ask me. Unfortunately we didn’t think to bring a bottle of wine with us. Next time! There was a gorgeous dresser with a large flat screen TV on it directly across from the amazing king size bed. The bed had wonderful linens, a plush top mattress, loads of pillows, and a soft back leather headboard. The colors in the room were rich red, black, sand and white. It felt warm, rich, exotic, relaxing and luxurious! The door to the bathroom had a panel inset that was a piece of artwork itself with colored and translucent glass. The bathroom had a large mirror and sink area as well as a large vanity area with stool. There was not a soaking tub, but hey when you are only staying one night you probably aren’t going to take a bath anyway. The shower was incredible! It had not one, not two but three shower heads! They were positioned above your head, about your mid section, and lower. Warm water pulsated at the angles that you determined by moving the showers heads up, down, left or right. Last but not least there was a separate toilet closet for greater privacy. (lol) I determined the room was worth $185 but I was glad we were paying less!

After a quick lunch we went to the outlet mall to start our shopping. We only had a few hours as we knew we wanted to watch some basketball later that evening. Due to the lack of time and our uncertainty we weren’t all that successful the first afternoon of shopping. We each found a couple of things and decided we would come back that evening or the next day and look some more. It was however very relaxing to go in and out of stores just the two of us. There are a lot of great stores at the outlet mall, many with good deals and some with amazing additional % off coupons. I would recommend starting at Calvin Klein or Van Heusen as they seem to be connected and hand out coupons for extra discounts to 4 related shops (Bass, Izod and Van Heusen). We headed back to the hotel to drop off our bags. Tom and I went downstairs to ask the concierge for a recommendation for a local place to eat and watch the March Madness game as the Huskies were playing. A place just a bit north on I-5 at the Smokey Point exit was recommended and we headed out. We watched the game, drank a beer and had a bite to eat. This is vacation! After the game and a quick trip to Costco to get a birthday gift for a friend’s little boy we went back to the hotel to determine if we were up for going downstairs to the club to hear music and maybe, just maybe do a little dancing. Many of you know that Tom and I met dancing and we both love to get our groove on.
After much hemming and hawing we headed down to the casino and clubs. Tulalip has two clubs in their casino area and a restaurant as well. It was interesting as we walked through the casino that weekend. Quite honestly it did not look like the TV commercials in the least. We didn’t see one person with a huge smile on their face, laughing as they tossed the dice or placed their bets. Instead what we saw were many, many people sitting intently staring at slot machines, idly pressing buttons at what they thought might be just the right moment, over and over again. Many sat their cigarette or drink in hand with a blank if not unhappy look on their faces, the young and the old spending time and money in hopes of a win. One of the clubs was a DJ dance club. It boasted a dress code but as we peered in the dance floor was empty. It was however a Thursday night and I suppose probably more active on a Friday or Saturday. The other club was having live music, the Aphrodisiacs. I had seen them once before at the Muckleshoot Casino years ago and remembered them to be quite entertaining. Tom and I went to check it out. Much to our dismay the clubs in addition to the casino allow smoking. This is something we hadn’t thought about when choosing to come here. When did the smoking ban go into effect in WA State? It seems like forever since we have been to an establishment where there was smoking allowed. It stinks! Literally. As many sat puffing away on their stinky cigarettes polluting the air that I was trying to breath, we tried to focus on the music and not let the smoke get to us. What a bummer!
We got a drink and found a place to sit and enjoy the entertainment. The performers and the patrons alike! As we sat people watching we began to realize that either there was a convention going on in the hotel or this was the ‘local’ hangout for cross dressers. We were surrounded by men dressed as women and they were having a great time! Maybe they follow the Aphrodisiacs. We didn’t ask. I actually enjoy people watching. After a while we headed to the dance floor to shake our groove thing. The tunes were good and we had a lot of fun. It wasn’t long though when we both determined the smoke was just a little more than we cared to handle and we headed back to our room. What did we used to do before the smoking ban?
After a long sleep, a good cup of coffee in our hotel room, and a fantastic shower we checked out and headed back to the outlet mall to spend our allotted money. With a little over 3 hours to go before had to head south and back to reality we got down to business. We found we were both quite successful and ended up with a lot of good deals. Tom ran out of money and had to borrow $12 of my dollars (come to think of it, I don’t think he has paid me back yet….) to complete his final purchase. Happy with our finds we packed up and headed home. As we rolled into the driveway we breathed our last breath of our 29 hour getaway. Tom headed in to get Michael and give Donna a ride home and I headed down the road to a real estate appointment. It was a quick one and I didn’t mind at all. I felt relaxed, refreshed and rejuvenated!
All in all I would say the Tulalip Casino and Resort is a great little getaway, especially with the outlet mall literally within walking distance from the hotel. The only downside was the smoking in my opinion. So if you don’t mind smoking or can handle it for a short bit you might enjoy a night or two at the resort. Heck, maybe you can do a little gambling (no smiling required) and win some dough while you are at it! I am looking forward to the class reunion this summer. I know it will bring some smiles and laughter to the place and make it that much more fun for sure! I think we will stick with our plan and book a room that night for a pre-party before the big event. We can’t wait for our next 24+ hour getaway in August. I think Auntie Sherry and Uncle Terry are coming down to stay with Michael that time. Woohoo!!!

UPDATE 2010 Goals

2010-04-24T20:03:00.000-07:00

Thought I would take a moment to update my 2010 Goals AKA New Year's Resolutions for some. If you remember I decided to make a to do list rather than major life changes this year. Here is how I am doing 3.5 months into the year:

2010 To-Do List/Goals

DONE 1. Finish Brokers Course in January
DONE 2. Take Brokers Cram Course
DONE 3. Take Brokers License Exam - Jan/Feb
4. Print all photos that are stored on laptop for albums
5. Make Laurie’s scrap book
Halfway done 6. Plan Laurie’s graduation Party
7. Plan a time to release my parent’s ashes with my siblings this summer.
8. Close 12 real estate transactions.
Working on it....9. Write blog more often.
Nope..... 10. Spend at least 30 minutes a day writing my book.
Yep! 2X per month. 11. Work with community teen girls at Saturday Night Late Night Program.
12. Plan future events with teen girls.
13. Learn how to apply for and get a grant for teen girl events.
Some! 14. Spend time with friends and family.
Yep and we all like the new church! 15. Go to church as a family.
Getting better....16. Be positive.
hmmm....for the most part...except when I am exhausted....17. Work on #39 from wedding vows “Be Nice”.
Yes! 18. Be thankful.
Yep! 19. Always work on my marriage (every day).
Yes! 20. Nurture my relationship with my daughter and my son.
This one is becoming easier and easier! 21. Put family first in all things.
22. Hold a garage sale and get rid of all items in and around my home that are not being used.
Working on it! 23. Complain less.
Decided we couldn't do it this year due to her college enrollment....24. Walk 3-Day with daughter.

I have a few things related to Laurie's graduation that I need to get on the stick about. So April and May are going to have to focus on those items. The photo printing, scrap book and party need to be my first priority. Real estate sales need to be next as we need the income. Then I will see what I can get done the second half of 2010! :-)

Time is Running Out - And That's Okay.

2010-04-22T15:55:00.000-07:00

I am sure many of you are hearing from here, there and everywhere that the deadline for the Tax Credit is approaching very quickly. April 30th 2010 is literally 8 days away. That's a hop, skip and a jump my friend! Having just put a home on the market today I am hoping that some of the first time buyers who are still out there looking and hoping to cash in will be mesmerized by our new listing as it is a beauty! Actually all three of our current listings are beautiful properties.

For those of you who have a home listed right now or are thinking of listing but are not ready yet and you are worried that when April 30th comes and goes your home won't sell I have what I believe is hope. I have spoken with many buyers over the past month. Some who have come to me and want to begin their home search. Others whom I have met at open houses as they are out looking. The majority of them have told me that while they would like to get the tax credit of $8,000 they are not letting that make their decision for them. They plan to continue looking even after the deadline passes until they find the home they want. I would say that is a good indication that homes will continue to sell even after April 30th. It is also likely that new buyers will come around after April 30th as well. People's circumstances dictate when they begin their search for a home. Many people who right now are not looking for a home to buy may find in the next 30, 60 or 90 days that they are in fact ready to begin their search. Maybe due to a job promotion, job change, getting married, find out they are pregnant and need more space, or one of the other many life changing experiences that encourage people that now is the time to buy a house.

I believe although the tax credit has been a good incentive to get buyers going the impending increases in interest rates should be a greater motivation for buyers. A one percent increase in interest rate can drastically change how much mortgage a buyer can afford. Currently interest rates still hover at 5%. If we see these increase over the rest of the year we may see some buyers have trouble affording loans. If however, we increase ever so slowly we will still be alright as rates below 6% are still great rates!

The most important thing for a seller to do right now is make your home the best home on the market. Clean up that yard, clean off the roof, wash those gutters and don't under estimate the power of squeaky clean windows! Your home should be spotless. Less is definitely more when it comes to decorating unless you are a professional stager who knows just what items will accentuate the positive. Colors on walls are definitely better than white as long as they are colors that the majority will like to live with. It is worth the money to hire a stager and to pay for a consultation before going on the market.

If you are considering selling this summer than now is the time to meet with a Realtor. Realistically you will need a minimum of 30 days and more likely 2-3 months to truly be market ready depending on what all needs to be in and outside your home. Give us a call today!

If by chance you are a buyer reading this blog......you still have 8 days to find that dream home and get mutual acceptance on a property in order to take advantage of the tax credit. Get off the couch and get looking!

Sounders Opening Night 2010

2010-04-10T15:30:00.000-07:00

The Reddy Family has season tickets once again to the Seattle Sounders Soccer Season. We are excited and looking forward to some great matches! Michael once again joined daddy, mommy and sissy for opening night. We do believe he will be joining us for at least half of the games this season. He is destined to be a soccer fan! The match was good although quite rainy. We dawned our fashionable ponchos as did many others. We are once again joined by cousins Derek, Aly, Colin and Bry who sit directly behind us at every game! Cousins Dan and Nathaniel are a few rows above us. Maybe one year we will all change seats and find a grouping together! Take a look at the pics from the March to the Match where Laurie met Drew Carey and Tony Ventrella for autographs and pics, the Sound Wave band, our ponchos and the Blue Man - I mean, Blue Cousin Group!

Rave

2010-04-10T15:24:00.000-07:00

People who offer to help when you are lost. :-)

Rant

2010-04-10T15:23:00.000-07:00

Drivers who don't use their turn signals! Argh!

All Nations Sports Bar - Seattle

2010-03-22T22:09:00.001-07:00

A few weeks ago Tom and I headed out for date night on foot. We have limited options of places we can walk to in our neighborhood when it comes to an evening out whether it be for drinks or for dinner. If only we lived a bit further south on Greenwood closer to 80th...but then we would not live on a lake. And so it is with high hopes that we found ourselves entering the renovated Mr. Bills that is now known as the All Nations Soccer Bar & Restaurant. I have made the title of this blog post a link to their website. Check it out!

The layout is much the same as it was in days gone by of Mr. Bill's. We used to go there for breakfast now and then. They decor has however changed. Upon entering we noticed a large wall projection in the bar area as well as a TV with of course soccer showing at the time. We only peeked into the main family dining area but saw that it too has a large wall projection for sports as well.

The bartender was more than friendly and quickly began to tell us about the menu and drink specials. When I expressed uncertainty about what I wanted to drink he asked a few questions qualifying my palette and then suggested a drink which just happened to be on the Happy Hour menu as well. He continued to tell us about the menu, the bar, the regulars and all that happens at All Nations. He was great! Friendly and funny. We let him know that we were Sounders season ticket holders and would be at all home games but had been considering coming over to watch an away game. He let us know that they restaurant fills up on away game days as many of the Sound Wave band members come there to watch the game. He then let us in on the membership program the restaurant has. (Don't worry, it wasn't a sales pitch. Just info.) It is quite reasonable actually. For $50 per year members get preferred reservations for away game days a few days before games. They also get drink specials every day all day, 10% off there tab every time they come in, and special prices on the infused Rums and liqueurs that the owner makes himself! The restaurant also offers an All-You-Can-Eat option on Friday nights. It is like no other pizza and salad 'buffet' that I have heard of. Sam compared it to Dim Sum. Waiters bring by different types of salad and pizza as they are freshly made. You choose what you want and how much as they continue to come around. The charge is $16.95 per person. Initially I thought this sounded like a lot, and yet if you think about it a salad at a nice restaurant is typically 6.95 to 9.95 per person. A dinner runs you anywhere between 10.95 to 19.95 per person at most restaurants in the area as well. You are looking at $16.95 - $30.95 for a descent meal and that is a controlled portion. I am not big on gorging myself but one could easily get your $16.95's worth with some salad and gourmet pizza!

While we were waiting for our food the owner, Sam, came by to introduce himself. He brought along with him 2 tall shot glasses of a banana infused rum that he had made. He shared with us how he makes it and then we sipped away. Yum! It was delicious, smooth, and only slightly warm as it slid down our throats. The best rum I have ever had! Sam was very friendly and shared with us the number of restaurants he has opened in a few different countries, how they are the same and how they vary. We spoke of the economy and how the restaurant is fairing considering it as well as the neighborhood. Sam is optimistic that clientele, membership and sales are up. Considering the fact that a new MLS soccer season is about to be underway this Thursday and the soccer players are not going on strike he may be looking at several good months in the near future.

After dinner we decided to take them up on the membership idea and signed up. While the bartender was processing our bill Sam came out with a celebratory shot on the house! It too was good. We have since e-mailed our photo to the restaurant and I just received word that our membership cards are ready. Oh, the membership is good for you and one guest. So either Tom and I can go together or Tom can take a friend (yes, Joe maybe you...or maybe you Steve.) or I can go and take a friend (yes, Dawn that would be you, or maybe you Katie or hey, maybe Laura wants to come up for a beer and some soccer!). However we look at it, it's a good deal. 10% on a few meals out will easily get us our $50 bucks worth and if we get seating to watch an away Sounders game even better!

Lastly, it is important to mention although soccer is a favorite of ours the bar also shows other sporting events such as Seahawks games, the Olympics, March Madness, NBA games and more. They post their schedule online and also e-mail it out....to members.

Hope to see you there soon!

Catch Up on The Reddy Fam

2010-03-22T14:54:00.000-07:00

Wow! Time flies when you are sick! Last week was the worst. As it turns out I had a pretty major sinus infection and needed antibiotics. Having now been on them for 8 days I am nearly better. 2 more days to go and hopefully I will be in tip top shape. I typically can work through being sick but this a doozy. I actually had to send myself to bed two different days. I even missed one of our girl's soccer games which is completely unlike me. Tom and I had planned a 29 hour getaway (if you have children you will understand the importance of each and every hour in the 29 hours.....) for Thursday. Having set up overnight childcare for the toddler we could not give it up and went even though I was not feeling my best. We had a wonderful time and I will blog a review of the hotel and shopping experience soon!

The fam is doing great! Michael is nearing his second birthday and continues to blow us all away with his vocabulary. Just today while we were driving around on our many errands for a Monday he said to me, "Drop Sissy off school. Then go to fry place. Then go to condo. Then go home. Let's do it!" He had the errands correct just a little off on the order as we had to go to the condo before getting burgers and fries to take home! Last night while eating at friends house he said to all of us at the table, "Rice is very hot." Our host told him it actually wasn't hot anymore to which Michael responded, "It's just right." We all had a good laugh and agreed. Laurie is continuing to keep us on our toes as well. She has joined a Co-ed adult basketball league that plays on Sundays. Having her driver's license she is able to drive herself to and from the games as long as we are willing to give up a car. She also drives to Tacoma once a week to meet with her college scholarship group and she currently has straight A's. This has been a goal of hers and she has worked hard to make it happen. We are quite proud of course! I am enjoying mommy-hood and Tom is enjoying daddy-hood. We have started attending a new church within the past month. I will write a review of that as well. Lastly, the Sounders soccer seasons gets under way this Thursday and the Reddy family will be in our season seats for the first match! We are excited for another season of soccer!

Miss-Communication....Imagine that!

2010-03-12T17:03:00.000-08:00

So...I thought I should post an update to my blog from earlier today in case anyone reads it. I met with the gentleman that I spoke about and he turned out to be a descent guy. Professional and even polite. Apparently he just didn't want to sit through a long sales pitch about what other homes would be available in his price range as he has determined he only wants to live in a couple of particular buildings. Also, he currently lives close to those two buildings and didn't want to spend time driving to an office when he could simply meet an agent at the properties close to his current home. Made sense once we had the conversation but through e-mail he came across as either a murderer, rapist or maybe an arrogant son-of-a-*beep*....okay, not quite that bad but he did seem to want to control the situation. E-mail and text conversations have this way of skewing the conversation. Depending on who you are and how you read them they can sound way worse or maybe even way better than the writer intended them too. And if the recipient has a tendency to read into everything they read it's quite possible a war could break out over a simple message.

A word to the wise...think about what you are typing when sending e-mails and text and be careful how it may be interpreted on the receiving end.

Safety Precautions - Sad but necessary.

2010-03-12T13:59:00.000-08:00

Recently I have come in contact with some new clients via a referral service for agents. I receive leads and whatever contact information they give out and then follow up with them. Often times it is just an e-mail address and every now and then there is a phone number as well. So far from the ones who have responded I have had good luck setting an appointment to meet with them at my office for a brief introduction and then we head out from there to go look at homes either that same day or at our next appointment.

When I receive a referral from a client or friend I often meet with that person in their own home or even at the first home we are going to look at together. Knowing that someone I know knows them and is personally connected with them makes me feel okay foregoing the in office meeting. Meeting a complete stranger for the first time at a vacant home somehow to me doesn't seem to be the safest thing to do in this day and age. It is unfortunate but there are people out there and stories that I have heard about Realtors being harmed and even killed by someone who asks them to meet at a home to show it to them. I like to think that I am a lucky person and nothing bad would happen to me and yet, I know it is stupid to assume that nothing bad will ever happen to me and smart to take precautions to try to avoid putting myself in harms way.

Am I too cautious? I am paranoid? I don't think so, but who knows. Just this week I received a lead for a man who wants to see a condo. I left him voicemail and e-mails to gather a little bit of information to qualify what kind of a buyer he and how ready he is to purchase as well as to set a time to meet at my office. First the guy avoided my questions and then he insisted on meeting at the property. I stuck to my guns and insisted we meet at the office first. He then proceeded to tell me he didn't want a sales pitch nor did he want to have his time wasted. Trust me, I am not a sales person. Either you want to buy a house or you don't. I have no intentions of pressuring someone into buying something they do not want or something more expensive then what they can afford or feel comfortable buying. Even after I shared with him my reason for meeting at the office first is for safety reasons which I thought he may just not have considered he was in my opinion less than understanding. He finally agreed to meet at my office but told me he would only have 30 minutes to meet and see the place and asked me to respect his time. Dude? How about my time? Feeling a strong urge to tell the guy to take a hike along with his arrogant attitude and yet not wanting to bail on an opportunity to work I kept the appointment. So far, most of the people I have shared this with have said I shouldn't be wasting my time on him.

I can't help but wonder what has made this guy so annoyed with real estate agents. Is it a particular event that happened in the past and he simply hates sales people? Or is he just a jerk tried and true? It's altogether possible that he is using Redfin for his home purchase and is simply trying to get in to see the condo without having to pay a fee to do so. You see, Redfin till fill out your purchase and sale paperwork and fax it over for you but they will not show you homes without charging you for that. Imagine that! They want to get paid for their time. Oddly enough, so do I. I have not asked him yet if he is working with Redfin. That will be one of the things I will ask him when he comes to my office this afternoon. He is supposed to be arriving shortly.

All that said, if you were making an appointment with a real estate professional for the first time would it strike you as odd or annoying if they wanted to meet in their office prior to going to look at places? I like to think I am professional, helpful, and considerate of other people's time while doing my job.

Feeling Balanced

2010-03-09T16:53:00.000-08:00

Just a quick update to say that I am feeling quite balanced at the moment. Maybe blogging about my lack of juggling ability and simply clearing the air with myself on what I am capable of has helped me allow myself to set a few boundaries on my time. I do believe I battle more with myself than anyone else. I can't recall a single moment when my husband has said that I do not do enough or when my daughter has told me that I should try harder at being a mother, and as for my toddler well he will take all of the mommy time he can get right now. Even my clients seem to be very respectful of my time. It is myself that I battle with. Hashing it out in writing has brought it all to the forefront and quite frankly I kicked myself in that ass and said stop complaining and do something about it. And so I have scheduled things according to my availability rather than trying to fit everyone in on what I perceived to be their timeframe with no consideration to my own time. It was all me, not them anyway. And I am writing in a hurry as I want to dash out of this office and head home to go for a walk with my husband. I do believe I can tell that I am hurrying. And so, with that I will say good night and try to write a more intelligent blog post tomorrow! :-)

Oh, Meter Maid you forgot something!

2010-03-05T17:05:00.000-08:00

Yesterday I received a postcard in the mail that was informing me that my unpaid parking ticket would be turned over to collection if I did not submit payment plus penatly due before March 16th. Parking ticket? What parking ticket? I have never in my life received a parking ticket. (Tom has due to my direction as to where to park for free....what do I know about parking???) I called the information number on the postcard and after weaving my way through the automated system two times I found a live person (I know a rarity!). After telling Alan my ticket number he informed me of the address I was at on Saturday, February 6th on Francis Ave in Seattle. Aparently there is no street parking between the hours of 8:00 PM and midnight except by Zone 27 permit. Huh? It is a residential negihborhood. I told him I did not receive a parking ticket. Alan replied that just because I did not physically receive it does not me I do not have to pay it. I reminded Alan it is difficult to pay for something that you do not know you owe. He said he could do one of two things for me. He could ask his supervisor to wave the additional fee if I agreed to pay for the ticket over the phone or he could ask the superviosr to authorize a hearing although I was past the allowed timeframe to appeal since I didn't respond to the ticket that I did not receive. I asked him how I was supposed to know I couldn't park there between those hours. He said the officer noted on the ticket that there are in fact 6 signs on the street stating this parking requirement. (Of course I tell Alan I didn't see these signs and Alan sighs in disbelief.) Alan reiterates that I must make a decision right now as to which option I want to pursue. I explain to Alan it is difficult to make a snap decision in regards to something that I knew nothing about. How should I know if the signs in fact exist just because the officer wrote down that they do? Maybe they are all covered by tree branches and not in plain sight. Or maybe they have all been removed by local vandals (AKA teenagers) who have now hung them up on their bedroom walls. Alan sighed again and said I needed to make a decision. So I told Alan I wanted a hearing. Alan tells me he will put me on hold and go speak to his supervisor. As I am on hold with Alan I pick up my cell phone and call Tom to tell him all that Alan has so kindly informed me of. Tom says I should just pay the ticket if they will waive the added fee. As Tom and I are chatting Alan comes back on the line and tells me the supervisor has authroized me to schedule a hearing. I interrupt Alan and tell him that while I was waiting I called my husband as it was a very difficult decision for me to make so quicky and my husband suggested I just pay the ticket if they will waive the added fee. Alan sighs his biggest sigh as of yet and says that he would have to speak to his supervisor again! I tell Alan I would appreciate him doing so and that I am more than happy to hold. Alan tells me that if his supervisor does wave the fee I will have to pay right now on the phone with my credit card. I assured Alan this would be fine. He puts me on hold. (My question here is how many of you think he really goes and speaks to a supervisor?) Alan comes back and informs me his supervisor has agreed to wave the fee for me this one time. He emphasizes that this is a one time waiver and it will not happen again. I assure Alan that I willl not call and request a waiver in the future as long as the officer or meter maid remembers to actually leave the ticket on my car so that I can do my part and request a hearing or pay the ticket in a timely matter like the good citizen that I am. Alan did not appear to be amused my thoughts on the matter. (Poor Alan, I think he was sitting in a cubicle wher he was unable to see the glorious sunshine that we were so very blessed with today.) I put on my best smile as I read off my credit card number to Alan in hopes of brightening up his day! I thanked Alan for his help and assistance and wished him a wonderful afternoon. Alan hesitently returned the well wishes and said goodbye.

Finding Balance

2010-03-02T09:26:00.001-08:00

Where o' where did the last week go? I must say I thoroughly enjoyed it. There was plenty of time spent with my family and a good amount of time spent working and yet the two remained oddly separate which was nice for a change. I found myself prodding myself to not think about all that needed to be done work wise while I was playing with Michael on my days off. I kept a running list of things to do when I went to work and only allowed myself half of nap time to catch up on e-mails and such rather than letting it dominate the entire 2 hours leaving me wishing for 30 minutes to myself. What a nice change! Now if only I can do that again this week.

A little help please...

2010-02-25T14:14:00.000-08:00

Those are definitely words that I am not good at saying. And yet, my husband is always more than willing to help me out if only he knew I wanted or needed help. I always make it seem like I have it all under control. That is what I do. I am a fixer and a planner by nature. Believe me it is a blessed curse, a true oxymoron. And at times I am a moron who thinks I would be less of a person if I asked for help. Ever the battle within myself.

After yesterdays blog my husband offered to help in any way he can with my juggling act. Now he is good at juggling oranges, balls, you name it he can do it. He is quite good at juggling work, life and stress too. A real good sidekick in all honesty and for me a real good catch. Now to take him up on his offer.

Juggling - I'm simply not good at it.

2010-02-24T13:01:00.000-08:00

This is difficult for me. It is so much easier to post successes and good things that are happening in life. I often think that most people want to read a blog that is encouraging, uplifting, or funny and strange. Something that makes them laugh, impresses them or makes them feel good. And yet, I know that I myself am often intrigued by realness in people. That quality and ability to be open, honest, even vulnerable at times sharing what life is really like. Many a time I sit ready to write with thoughts running through my head only to find that I am afraid to type them out because they are too real. They would in fact reveal that I am at times weak. That I break or falter when faced with adversity and even fall apart from time to time feeling as though I am just not strong enough to continue on.

I don't know how to juggle. To be perfectly honest I have only half heartedly tried and truly given it little to no effort. I just don't believe I am coordinated in that way. Not sure if it is a hand eye coordination or if it is a brain thing but nevertheless I am unable to get the balls to flow through the air in proper formation so that my hands can keep them moving around and around. I admire those who can. On the other hand I am very good at juggling many tasks at the same time. I can juggle household chores, playtime with our son, our daughter's never ending schedule, Doctor appointments, play dates, grocery shopping, and the other endless tasks involved with running at household. I am also pretty good at juggling paperwork, phone calls, e-mails, deadlines and the likes in an office environment. The one thing I am really struggling with is juggling being a mommy and a successful real estate agent. That was difficult to say. I so want to be good at it all. And I definitely want everyone to think I have it all under control.

It's tough. When I am working I am very focused and it feels good. I even find that I forget that I am a mommy at times. I know my children are well cared for and I do not have to worry about them. And so I get completely caught up in my work and am totally focused on it so much so that I forget that I do anything else but work. On these days it is literally when I get in my car and start driving home that I think about my kids. Sometimes I wonder if this is weird or if it is perfectly normal. It might be yet another example of one of my coping mechanisms of tuning things out or compartmentalizing what is happening based on what I can deal with at the time. And then there are the days that I am home with Michael. On these days I am a mommy. I sit on the floor and play with cars and balls and read books. I run around the living room and play chase. I march, 'Hup, two, three, four' to the bathroom for potty time. I clean up spilled milk and pick up food that has been launched across the room. Sometimes it's fun, sometimes it's tough and sometimes I want to cry because it is exhausting.

When I am working I enjoy working. When I am a mommy I enjoy being a mommy. It's juggling back and forth between the two that I find very difficult sometimes. There are days when I just want to be a mommy. I want to wake up knowing that all I have to do that day is be there for our son, our daughter and do the things that my family needs for our household to run. I want to run errands, play with the kids, bake cupcakes, do laundry, iron my husband shirts (yes, Tom there are days when I wish I did this.) plan and prepare meals, and then crawl into bed knowing that I will do it all over again the next day. And that is all I want to do with the exception of a little me time now and then of course. At times I resent that my brain is unable to ignore the constant reminders of all of the work related things I either need to do, should do or will be doing when I go to work the next day. I wish I had a shut off valve that allowed me to completely forget work when I am at home being a mommy. Oddly, I am not able to do that. It is then that I feel guilty about not spending more time doing work related things during nap time or after Michael has gone to bed but instead leaving them for the days that I am at the office. And then the guilt makes me feel angry. I just want to enjoy the time I have now as I know one day it will be gone. I don't want to look back and wish I had spent more time with our children.

Juggling the balance between being a mommy and being a career woman is tough! Some days I don't even want to think about it and yet my mind always seems to go in that direction. This never ending battle with myself. What am I supposed to do? Can I set up boundaries to allow myself to be a mommy one day and a Realtor the next? Is it possible to where both hats at the same time or switch them back and forth at will? Will my clients be there in 3 years if I reduce the time I am working now to focus on our children? Will I regret the time I could have spent advancing my career but waited? Or will I be thankful that I focused on my family? Will our household suffer from less income and all of the things we have given up since we can't afford them right now? Or will we grow closer by simply spending time together doing things that don't cost money? Is there a right or a wrong answer to these questions? At the moment I hate juggling! (Laughing as I type that because I picture myself stamping my foot in complete and utter defiance. I just want life to be easy.)

Today I am home and I am a mommy. Although I did spend a good portion of nap time dealing with some real estate issues trying to get a home sale to close this week. A little juggling and now I am back to being a mommy for a few hours again before I meet briefly with a client this evening to sign some papers.............tomorrow I will work half the day as a Realtor and then have the afternoon as a mommy again.......

Success!

2010-02-18T15:02:00.000-08:00

I was asked recently what success means to me. This is an easy one for me. Spending time with my family, putting my children and my husband first, nurturing relationships with my friends, helping others in whatever way I can and then working the job that my family needs me to is all that I need to feel successful. Being self employed means that I have the potential to make whatever income I want to spend the energy and time to make. If I want to make $200,000/year I need to write the business plan, follow the tasks that will produce leads, pursue the leads, maintain the clients and negotiate to close the deals for my clients all of which will result in paychecks. In order to do that and make that kind of money or more I have to be willing to work long hours and more than likely 6-7 days per week especially in the current market. Having a full bank account would make many people very happy. I on the other hand would be miserable if it meant being away from my family 6-7 days a week and not having dinner with them on a regular basis. One might say you would have enough money to take a vacation with your family. True enough, but why wait to spend time with your kids and hubby once a year when you can do it every day? I am happiest when I have time with my kids and know in my heart that they have the time with their mom that they want and need. To nurture relationships with my children is the greatest accomplishment in my life. To be able to say that my 18 year old daughter makes time to be with me is a testimony to our relationship. To hear my daughter say that she wants me at her sporting events, her meetings at school, or to go out to lunch or go on a walk with just me means to me that I have done the right thing by putting her first before my career. Knowing that I have raised a daughter who is kind, genuine, responsible, loving, giving, smart, and articulate to name a few of her good qualities means to me that I have succeeded as a parent. Knowing that I am trying my best to raise her little brother the same way tells me that I have my priorities in order. Sure, a lot of money would be nice. Vacation sounds so good right now (especially since we haven't been on one in 2 years). And yet, neither of those would make me feel successful if it cost me the bond that I have with my children and the relationship that I have with my husband.

Silly Little Guy!

2010-02-12T13:57:00.001-08:00

Michael just loves to play with daddy's hats and sissy's sunglasses. Thought these were some good shots of the little bugger!

Senior Night - Girls Varsity Basketball

2010-02-12T13:33:00.000-08:00

This has been a pretty incredible week for Laurie. On Tuesday her high school basketball team had their last home game and thus Senior Night. It is her last sport of the year making it all the more special. On Wednesday she competed in a FBLA (Future Business Leaders of America competition at the Maydenbauer Center in Bellevue. I believe she will go to the State competition later this year. On Thursday we all headed to Tacoma for a Dessert Celebration honoring all of the Act Six Scholarship recipients. On Friday Laurie is heading to Tacoma for a weekend retreat with the Act Six program to prepare the kids for the 7 months of training ahead. Phew! That is some week if you ask me.

For Senior Night a few parents got together and provided supplies for one of the moms to make candy lais for the girls. All of the parents purchased flowers and/or balloons. The younger players on the team and coaches gave the girls gifts as well. There are 8 seniors on the varsity team this year. Before the game started all of the players walked out onto the court with their parents or supporting family. It was one more moment in our daughters ever exciting life! Tom and I are simply enjoying all of the wonderful events and activities that our girl is involved with. We are so very blessed and we remind ourselves of this constantly.

Here are a few photos of some of the girls from Senior night:

Remembering When.......

2010-02-08T08:27:00.000-08:00

Saturday Tom, Michael and I headed up to Stanwood. We met Tom's sister and her boyfriend at her rental house. The tenants had recently moved out and left the home in a bit of disarray. While I have seen worse it still ticks me off when tenants take advantage of a home owner who has given them a place to live and not only don't maintain it but cause damage to it.

Prior to renting it out the home had beautiful curb appeal and a lush lawn and landscape around the home. After getting Michael set up with some toys I set to work on the front flower bed removing the weeds that had been growing for 24 months. I couldn't believe the roots on these things! On my knees in the dirt with my gardening gloves on and the sun shining down on my head, I realized it was starting out to be a very good day. While I was weeding Michael came over to see what I was doing and soon we were digging for worms together. We had a blast! First one worm, then two, three, four, five and many, many more. We put them in a bucket with a little dirt. Michael carried them around.

It wasn't long and a truck pulled down the street and there was cousins inside! Mikee and two of his kids had come to help us out. Michael was excited to see his cousins Sadie and Blake and he quickly showed them the worms we were finding. They too were into worms and set out digging to find more. Nothing like some good old dirt and worms for some down to earth fun! The kids played for about an hour or so and then it was time for them to go get a haircut. It was great for Michael to see his cousins and we really appreciated Mikee cleaning the gutters and taking out a native tree/weed from the flower bed in front of the house.

We continued to weed around the house and rake up the dead debris. All the while Michael played. The clocked ticked the time away and before we knew it it was 1:00 PM. Michael's nap time. I set up the play pen and then told Michael to tell me when he was ready for nap. We have yet to get him to successfully lay down for a nap at someone elses house at least not without a considerable fight. He was playing so well I really didn't want to mess with the joyous atmosphere. Auntie Sherry went and got us lunch and we all sat on the back deck in the beautiful sunshine and ate our lunch together. It was nearing 2:00 and daddy told Michael that when we were done eating it was going to be time to take a nap. Michael said, "okay daddy." Seriously?

I took Michael inside and changed his diaper. We read three stories and then I was snuggling him while sitting on the floor (there was no furniture or chairs). Michael told me there wasn't a rocking chair for snuggling. Then he said he was ready to lay down. I put him in the play pen with his books and a stuffed frog. Gave him hugs and kisses and left the room fully expecting to hear the screaming begin at any moment. Auntie Sherry and I listened to him talk to himself for a few minutes and then it got silent. He went to sleep! And slept for two hours! It really was a good day!

Tom and I spent the rest of the afternoon working in the yard in the warm sunshine. By the time we were done the yard looked great. The curb appeal was back. Most of all we had spent a day doing something that we used to do together nearly every weekend. We loved working in our yard together. Well, it started out as Tom's yard when we were dating. And over time has become our yard. I remember when I worked my Monday through Friday job I couldn't wait for the weekend. I knew that Laurie and I would pack up and head to Tom's house. We would settle in on a Friday night and hang out together. Then on Saturday Tom and I would work on some project in the yard while Laurie played or swam in the lake. If it was hot enough we would all end up in the lake by late afternoon for some splashing fun. I will never forget the first summer. It took me all summer to muscle up the courage to jump off the dock into the lake. It was early September before I got up the gumption and jumped in feet first. Once I did it I didn't want to stop for fear I wouldn't be able to get myself to do it again. I jumped over and over and over. Got up the next day and did it all over again. As the weather turned cold I wondered if I would be able to jump in sooner the next year.

I really enjoyed working in the yard with Tom this past weekend. Even though it wasn't our yard it was really nice to have the time together enjoying something we both love. Time in the sun and in the dirt with no work responsibilities for a whole day. Relaxing. I didn't realize just how much work it really was until my butt muscles started hurting the next day! The pain was a nice reminder of those weekends years ago together. I think we need to get back out into our own yard and enjoy what we have....a love of being together no matter where we are or what we are doing.

Garbage In Garbage Out

2010-02-02T16:03:00.001-08:00

I am about to venture into what may be a touchy subject. Do I need a disclaimer? Must I remind you that this is but my personal opinion, thoughts, and what works for me. While I do not impose my position on any topic on anyone, I choose to share my point of view here on this blog. If you know me at all you know that there are times when I hesitate to say what I think for fear of offending someone. Heaven forbid I make someone mad enough to tell me so! And yet, what is life without hearing what someone else thinks? It is those moments that we are given the opportunity to grow or to agree to disagree. And so it is with that said that I will venture into my opinion in hopes that if we disagree we can at least agree to disagree and remain 'friends'. I am now stepping atop my soapbox......

When I was growing up I went to church with my family at the Arlington Assembly of God. I can still see the orange shag carpet that filled the auditorium. Oh, the 60's! Well, I was born in the 70's but I am sure they installed the carpet long before I was born. I remember thinking I would never get married in that church and subject myself to the hideous memory of that carpet forever held in my wedding photos. Funny, even at a young age I was thinking of getting married and worried about my photos. I believe I went there from birth or near it. I grew up in Sunday School and attended youth group throughout Junior High and about half of High School. I distinctly remember my youth pastor. His name was Pastor Greg Johnson. One things he often said has stuck with me all these years. "Garbage In Garbage Out". We all knew what he meant and we knew exactly where he was going with it. Pastor Greg was about to tell us that we needed to stop watching the junk on TV that we all filled our minds with and stop listening to the ungodly music that so many teens listened to.

I have come a long way since my teen age days of going to Arlington Assembly of God and even from my young married days of attending Bible Baptist Church of Everett WA. And while I have expanded my horizons, changed my choice of music several times over, enlarged my point of view on movies worth seeing and those not, I do find myself returning now and then to the wise words of Pastor Greg. I am not against all worldly music nor do I think that all music that is not christian is garbage. I do not believe that one should or could only read the bible throughout their entire life. I am not of the opinion that I know all that is right or wrong. I do know that whatever I fill my mind with inevitably has a way of permeating my life, my being, my state of mind, my heart, my attitude and thus has a way of coming back out of me in words and deeds. Thus the metaphor 'Garbage In Garbage Out'.

Whenever I am feeling bogged down, stressed out, over loaded and often full of uncertainty if I take stock of what I have been fueling up on inevitably it is not the most positive stuff. Whether it be music, books, TV, or simply conversation with those around me. If I have filled my brain, my thoughts with negative information, data I feel like crap. There are even times when I will find myself having crazy dreams where I lose my child or my husband to some cruel and unusual act. Personally I think our dreams are a culmination of our thoughts, what we have read, seen, heard, and been exposed to over time short and long term and discombobulated into a dream. (Or maybe it was the old Chinese food in the refrigerator...seriously!)

Recently when our daughter was struggling with dreams and thoughts that were bringing her down we sat down and had this conversation. I told her while i didn't expect and wouldn't insist that she change what she was listening to or watching as she is 18 years old and fully capable of making these decisions, I wanted her to give it some thought. We spoke about music, lyrics, subject matter and the TV Series that she tends to watch. It became quite clear that her mind was being filled with anger, violence, fear, pain, and destruction without her even realizing it. I was really impressed when she told us she had decided to weed through her IPOD play list and make some adjustments. She was also ruling out some certain TV shows. And lastly she was taking stock in the people that were filling her time and how they were affecting her. Along with that she decided to adopt what I call the 10/10. Starting her day with 10 things that she IS and 10 things that she can/will do that day. It's all about creating your own mindset of how you want to be and how you want to perceive yourself and overriding the negative crap that has been filling up your thoughts. Our daughter has told us this has been amazingly helpful. It has helped me in the past and I often use it when I see myself getting down on myself and letting the past squirm its way back in.

I believe we become an average of what we surround ourselves with. I believe if we fill ourselves with garbage we should not be surprised when we feel down or depressed. I believe we have the power to change the way we think and feel. And I believe this is exactly what God expects us to do. To take responsibility for who we are and who we want to become. Then look to him for guidance, encouragement, and help.

Soon to be the new digs!

2010-02-02T15:32:00.001-08:00

A couple of pics from one of our visits to PLU before Laurie knew for sure it would be her home away from home for 4 years!

My Sweetie Boy

2010-02-02T15:24:00.000-08:00

It has been a while since I posted pics of my family. Life is so busy and my time on the computer is limited to studying, working and writing. And even all that is limited considering the amount of time I spend playing with our little guy and watching our girl play sports. No complaints here, life is good for the Reddy fam! :-)

Here are few pics of my 'Sweetie Boy' being a silly little bugger! Enjoy!

My Heart is Bursting!

2010-01-28T14:50:00.000-08:00

Our daughter received a letter in the mail today informing her that she did receive the Act 6 Four year full need scholarship!!!!!

It was quite a morning. I picked up the mail from the post office and headed to the school with our son Michael. We walked into the office and waited for Laurie to come back in from an errand. Michael walked over and handed his big sissy the envelope. She nervously held it in her hands as her friend suggested she sit down to open it. The office staff and a few bystanders in the waiting area watched on while she opened it. Once opened she waited to pull the letter out. We began to scan the letter. Laurie and I got to the acceptance words at the same time and we both started screaming! She jumped up we hugged and screamed some more. The principal stuck his head out of the office laughing. He knew! Lots of hugs and lots of congratulations! Laurie wanted to go tell a few specific teachers so we headed down the hall after she called her daddy to give him the good news! Every teacher was so happy for her and also thankful she came to share the good news with them. It is good for her, good for us and good for their school too! A full ride academic scholarship is hard to come by. Looks good for the local school indeed!

Tom and I are full to the brim and over flowing with happiness for our girl. Words are not enough to express how happy this mama is! :-)

40 Day Challenge - A Bust!

2010-01-26T21:10:00.000-08:00

So some of you who read regularly may have read a post I wrote earlier this year that I was taking a 40 Day Challenge of no fast food and working out in some way shape or form every day. Well, I have failed my own challenge! This would be why I don't do New Years Resolutions. I suppose it is yet another example of setting too high of a goal. Going for the top of the ladder while standing on the bottom rung. Baby steps seems to work a little better in the long run.

I like to work out. It feels good. I actually enjoy it. I just find I don't have time. And then again, maybe that isn't altogether true. I do not like to get out of bed early in the morning to work out. In that way I am not a morning person. I have often said the only thing getting me out of bed at 4:30 or 5:00 in the morning is knowing the Shuttle Express is pulling up at my door waiting to take me to the airport for my flight to a cruise ship vacation! Doesn't that sound great???? There is no chance I am getting up at that ungodly hour to work out. No way, no how. I suppose if I HAD to work at that hour I could force myself to, but I would do everything in my power not to work that early in the morning. I like to sleep. And I prefer to sleep from 10:30 PM until about 7:00 AM. Those are my ideal hours of sleep.

Whether I am working at the office or home with the baby, working out during the day is not an option either way. When Tom gets home from work he plays with the baby while I cook dinner. Then I play with the baby while he does the dishes. It's a nice trade off and it works for us. Then one of us does the baby's bedtime routine at about 7:45/8:00PM. If Tom does it then I can workout then, at 8:00 PM. If I do the bedtime routine then I can't workout until 8:45 PM. By this time I am tired and would really prefer to wind down before heading to bed myself. Excuses? Maybe.

I worked out every day for about 15 days and then missed a couple days. Then worked out for a couple and then missed a couple. Nevertheless I didn't do it every day. As for the fast food part, I made it two weeks. Then I worked Friday, Saturday and Sunday last weekend and was on the go all three days and I broke down and ran through the Burger King drive thru on my way from one appointment to the next. I suppose it is better than not having tried at all. And yet, it feels crappy to have failed something I challenged myself to do.

Although I failed I did not give up. I went for a walk this evening with Tom and then I worked out tonight and it felt great! I will continue to work out as often as I can and I hope it will be more regular than not. As for fast food, I think the two weeks off of it did cleanse my pallet a bit and I do not crave it as much as I had been. Honestly, my guilty pleasure is french fries! I can fore go any dessert you put in front of me but hand me some hot greasy salty fries and I am all in. Maybe one day I will give them up. Or maybe I will allow myself this guilty pleasure and work out to burn them off.

No more 40 Day Challenge but I am still working on my 2010 To Do List that I posted at the New Year.

2010 To-Do List/Goals

** COMPLETED .....................1. Finish Brokers Course in January
** Signed up for Feb 5th .........2. Take Brokers Cram Course
** Singed up for 2/16 ..........3. Take Brokers License Exam - Jan/Feb
** Uploading pics this week.......4. Print all photos that are stored on laptop for albums
** One deal in escrow.............8. Close 12 real estate transactions.
** Off to a good start............9. Write blog more often.
** hmmmm...not daily.............10. Spend at least 30 minutes a day writing my book.
** DOING IT!!....................11. Work with community teen girls at Saturday Night Late Night Program.
** Getting it on the calendar....14. Spend time with friends and family.
**Working on this one............15. Go to church as a family.
**Working on this one............16. Be positive.
**Working on this one............17. Work on #39 from wedding vows “Be Nice”.
**Working on this one............18. Be thankful.
**Working on this one............19. Always work on my marriage (every day).
**I like this one!...............20. Nurture my relationship with my daughter and my son.
**I like this one!!..............21. Put family first in all things.

**STILL working on this one......23. Complain less.
***This one is a maybe as she may be at college....24. Walk 3-Day with daughter.

I deleted the ones that I have not worked on as of yet. It is only January 26th. I have a lot of year left to work on everything!

Government Assistance for College Tuition

2010-01-26T14:12:00.000-08:00

I have had a couple of readers ask me if their student might qualify for government assistance since my post on Laurie's college and scholarship process. If you click on the title to this blog post it is a link to the governments website for the FAFSA (Free Application For Federal Student Aid). Go to the website and read through the information. You can fill the application out online to find out what you or your student qualifies for. Each persons situation is different. If your student is currently enrolled in college they can also go to the financial aid office at their school and get help filling out this information.

While some of these things take time, they are worth it!!

Good Luck!

Interesting Tidbit - Cravings

2010-01-26T14:09:00.000-08:00

I heard on the radio this morning that if you are craving something sweet and sugary you should go drink a full glass of water. They said that it is your body telling you that you are thirsty. Hmmm.....okay, I just felt like something sweet, eyed the little orange candy slices sitting on my desk...then reached for a glass of water and chugged it down. So far, so good. It was true that I hadn't had any water yet today.

Who would you give up your seat for?

2010-01-25T21:05:00.000-08:00

Okay, so one comment made by a reader in response to my post about racism caused me to take some time to think. He said (paraphrased) that he experienced racism on a recent bus ride from UW to Bothell when no one would let him sit down. He did say he is a large man but that he was certain it was because he was black. I am not going to say I don't believe or agree with him as it is his experience and he may very well be right. Without polling each and every person on the bus we will never know for sure. Quite honestly, and painfully sad I do think there are still those out there who would not give up their seat for a black person. Naively or innocently or one full of great hope I would like to think these people do not live in Seattle. It does make me wonder though, who would you give up your seat for or who would you or wouldn't you move over for?

Here is my answer to that question:

If I were sitting on a bus that was full (And I have been on a metro bus to downtown and home from downtown that was plum full. With standing room only.) I personally being a woman would give up my seat for a disabled person, an elderly person, a woman with a small child or baby, a man with a small child or baby, or a child riding the bus alone. I would not give up my seat for another adult of or near my age of seemingly the same health that I am in. In that case I believe it is first come first serve as to who sits and who stands. I have stood myself on many occasions. On those occasions I did not expect anyone on the bus to stand up and give me their seat. I am a young woman of good health and have no problem standing holding the rail.

If you will notice in my explanation above I used the word 'person' when stating who I would give up my seat for. This is because I would give it up to any person who fit any of those categories no matter their color, nationality, or size.

Now, if I were sitting on the bus in my seat which is made for two and there was obviously room next to me for another rider I would scoot over to allow ANYONE to sit that got on the bus. As that is their right.

So who would you give your seat up for? Do you even think about it when you are sitting there riding the bus lost in your ipod or on your phone? Do you take notice of who is getting on the bus and wonder if they would like to sit down? Or are you so caught up in your own little world too busy to care if anyone else has a seat or not?

An Incredible Journey

2010-01-23T12:44:00.000-08:00

An Incredible Journey

Last Friday Tom and I had the pleasure of spending a day at PLU (Pacific Lutheran University) in Tacoma, WA. For the past few months our daughter Laurie has been in a competition for a full ride scholarship through a program called Act Six. Initially Laurie sent in an application with two letters of reference from teachers to apply to the program. From all of the applicants (over 1300) about 400 were chosen to move on to Phase II in December.
Phase II consisted of an all day event in Federal Way (90 students met at a High School in Spokane for the applicants east of the mountains.) at a local High School. At the event the kids were divided into groups of ten and given a problem. They then had to discuss and work together to come up with a solution to the problem. Parents came back and joined the kids to learn more about Act Six as well as the colleges that were participating in the scholarship competition. The three colleges were PLU, Gonzaga and Northwest Christian. The kids could apply to any or all three of the colleges to be considered for the scholarship. Laurie chose PLU as her first choice and Gonzaga as her second choice school. She decided not to apply to Northwest Christian College as she did not feel it met her needs or fit her. From the second phase we were told there would be approximately 60 kids chosen to move on to the final phase in January. The kids were told very honestly that the likelihood of those present at Phase II moving on to Phase III was very slim and they should be proud of having come that far. It was a huge success in and of itself. Basically they each had a 15% chance of moving on to Phase III. Also looked upon as an 85% of not moving on, Wow!
Late in December Laurie received a letter on the date they had told the applicants to be watching the mail. Laurie began to open the envelope very slowly and carefully. As she began to skim the letter her eyes brightened and a loud scream was quickly released when she read the words that she was moving on to Phase III as a candidate for the scholarship to PLU. While not completely shocked by the news as we felt that Laurie met the criteria of what the program is looking for in leadership, we were blown away with joy and excitement for our daughter. We later found out that PLU chose 21 applicants to move on in the process and they will be choosing 7 from that group to receive what is called a full need scholarship. Briefly a full need scholarship takes the cost of tuition, adds in the cost of room and board, as well as an allowance for books/travel/personal items. They then subtract the amount that the FAFSA model states your family should be able to pay based on your income and assets. The balance remaining is your ‘need’. The one year tuition at PLU with room and board totals approximately $41,500. FAFSA says we should be able pay $4,600 for our daughter to go to school. That will leave a need of $37,000 each year. Laurie will more than likely have to work a few hours a week on campus to help reduce the cost of her books and personal expenses. The Act Six scholarship is the largest scholarship that participating colleges give. It is larger than any Merit Scholarship and larger than many sports scholarships given by many schools. The Act Six scholarship is based on Academics and Leadership. There are no sports scholarships given at PLU. The students are encouraged to apply for as many scholarships as they can to reduce the amount of money PLU will be on the hook for. After all scholarships and government grants are applied the college picks up the bill for the student in agreement with the Act Six Program.
Phase III was to be even more difficult than the first two. The applicants were mailed a packet with reading materials in it. They were given about 10 days to look over a poem and a five page article that had to do with government and religion. The article was written during the Bush Administration and quoted President Bush several times throughout it. I read the article and will honestly say it was a little over my head. Laurie spent a lot of time reading and analyzing the poem and the article. She was definitely nervous. We reminded her that they were not only looking for the students to understand the information but for their ability to take part in a group discussion about it. They would be observing the students and taking notes for recommendations. (What we didn’t know was that the discussions would be lead by college professors.) The applicants would be assigned a host student and would spend the night to get a taste of the college campus life. Their host provided an evening activity for them to go to. On Friday the parents were invited to join the kids for a tour of the campus as well as informational meetings about PLU and Act Six.
Laurie was anxious, nervous, excited, scared, and even bit overwhelmed by the whole event. The weight of a full need scholarship is quite heavy. I understand the pressure of feeling that you have to be on and perform for people, but I think these kids were put under sincere pressure to perform and yet be themselves through a very intense process. Add to that Laurie’s anxiety disorder and you can imagine how difficult it must have been for her to not only go but to participate in the discussions. Prior to leaving Laurie for the start of the event on Thursday Laurie had set up a meeting with the Women’s Soccer Coach and the Women’s Basketball Coach. We met with them at 1:00 and 2:00 to get an overview of their programs and need for athletes as well as how their Walk-On program worked for athletes wanting to play. Both coaches were friendly and welcoming. The soccer coach was vibrant and her love for the game, the team and her position at the school was evident. While she currently has two goalies on her team she was very excited to hear Laurie was a goalie and wanted to play. Laurie was given a run-down of how the schedule would work and when practices would begin in the summer. Laurie left the meeting feeling as though she would love to be a part of the soccer program at PLU. The Basketball Coach has a smaller roster and more specific needs for players. While she didn’t say Laurie wouldn’t make the team it seemed a little farther of a stretch. She encouraged Laurie to keep in touch and come to try-outs if she enrolled at PLU and they would take it from there. Exciting enough! Laurie has had two Community College Basketball Coaches scouting her this season. While she would love to play for one of them she has told them it all depends on if she gets the Act Six scholarship or not.
After our meetings with the coaches we walked around a bit with Laurie before we had to leave her. It was in this down time that Laurie began to feel the anxiety of us leaving her. She knew no one. That in and of itself is so difficult for Laurie and quickly overwhelms her. I could see her anxiety level rising and she looked at me with eyes begging me to not go and make her feel comfortable and safe. My heart ached with a longing to just make everything alright for my little girl. My own coping mechanism kicked in as I locked eyes with my daughter and said in the strongest voice I could muster, “YOU CAN DO THIS! I know you can and you know you can. All you have to do is go in there introduce yourself and get started. In a few hours you will be settled in and doing fine! Now wipe those tears and pull it together girl!” Harsh, I know. It is the only way I know to get her back on her strong side and ready to move forward. Is it the best thing to do? Honestly, I don’t know. I can only hope it is. I feel if I console her I will only allow her to break down more thus making it more difficult for her to let me leave. I walked away at this point with Laurie slowly trailing behind me. Within a few moments she grabbed Tom and I and said, “Okay, I am ready to do this and you need to leave. I love you and I will text you in a while.” We gave her hugs and headed out the door. We watched through a window as she entered the room where the kids were gathering. I wanted to run in there grab my little girl and make her feel safe, but I knew I couldn’t do that. Instead I took Tom’s hand and walked quietly to that car. He asked how I was doing and I said I was holding it together. I waited the rest of the afternoon for my phone to buzz with a text from my girl.
On Thursday night Laurie’s host took her to an event on campus where a Hypnotist was performing. Laurie said it was in the ‘Cave’ a social hangout on campus. She told us the room was packed. At least 45 people watching and 20+ participating in being hypnotized. She decided not to be hypnotized since she had a big day the next day. We received random text messages from Laurie that night about the hypnotist. It sounded hilarious! The boys were told they were nine months pregnant and they acted like it. Then they were told they were going into labor. Laurie said they were on the floor screaming and pushing! There was booty shaking, smelling of the person next to you and running from the stinky smelling person too. It sounded like a whole lot of fun! Laurie was up late as many people in the dorm kept coming by to meet the girl that was visiting. Laurie she felt welcomed and had an awesome time. She said the kids were friendly and really looked out for each other. I guess the girls she stayed with said several girls had home sickness when the year began so they all banded together and spend all their time together to make it easier. They walk to meals together, study together, and go to functions together. Laurie liked the sound of that. Home sickness is one of her fears. It was nice for her to see others experience it too and that these girls came up with a solution for it together.
We met up with Laurie at 10:30 AM on Friday and she filled us in on what had been happening so far. Her first group discussion had gone very well. She had received positive feedback from the observer after the event and felt good about it. Later she left us to go to her interviews with two college staff persons. Laurie again felt they went well. We broke for lunch after a session informing us more about the Act Six program. The Director of Admissions, Jennifer, joined Tom, Laurie and I at our table. It was nice to have the opportunity to visit with her. Laurie shared her experiences thus far and how she was enjoying the college. I told Jennifer how thankful we were to be a part of this process and what an amazing experiences it had been for us all. She replied that it was their pleasure to have Laurie at the event among other compliments to our daughter. After one more information session we were divided into groups and a college student gave us a tour of the campus. That was really fun. The student not only pointed out buildings and offices but shared her personal perspective on the college and campus life. Our guide was sweet and funny. Another college student jumped into our tour group as she recognized the girls and stayed with us throughout the duration. She also added her personal perspective and shared a funny story or two. We found out that she was a soccer payer and she and Laurie had an instant bond! Later that evening one of the interviewers came up and introduced herself to me and told me how amazing my daughter was and that they were all impressed with her. Laurie introduced us to one of the staff that she had spoken with that day. He had been an observer of one of the group sessions. He shared how impressed he was with Laurie and said she would have his vote! The day was ended with a wonderful formal dinner and presentation of PLU t-shirts to the student scholars. Each one was wished well and told no matter if they received the Act Six scholarship or not they were amazing and wanted at PLU. If they do not get the scholarship they are automatically reviewed for Merit Scholarships at PLU and admissions will work with them to make it as affordable as possible if they choose to come to PLU.
Our experience at PLU and the Act Six event was wonderful. Tom and I left feeling like we would love to have our daughter at PLU. The atmosphere, the student and staff interaction and involvement alone assured us it would be a positive place for Laurie to be. The small campus and classroom sizes impressed us. Laurie would be known by students and staff and that is reassuring for parents when their student will be living on campus away from home. The Act Six program requires students to reside on campus all four years of college. We left feeling confident that Laurie’s personality, accomplishments, qualities, characteristics and future goals had been seen by all who were observing to make a decision for the recipients. I feel confident that Laurie will get the scholarship. I can honestly say if she did not get the scholarship it would only be because all 21 students were amazing and they each must have had qualities that stood out above and beyond the average teenager, thus making a decision for the final 7 recipients a VERY difficult one indeed. The decision letters will be mailed out on January 27th and should be in our post office box on the 28th. A large envelope should mean yes as it will have forms to be completed. A small envelope should mean no. We are excited. Laurie is a little bit overwhelmed.
I should let you know what the commitment is if an Act Six Scholarship is received. The scholars immediately start in a 7 month training program to help develop leadership skills. They meet a few times each month in either Tacoma or downtown Seattle as a group. They are given reading and writing assignments that are read and ‘graded’ by college professors. While they must maintain a certain GPA and adhere to all college rules they must also participate in a leadership position on campus throughout their time in college. The options are endless as far as types of positions and groups they can participate it giving them a variety of opportunities to choose from. If at anytime they fail to participate, complete writing assignments, grades fall, or they break a college rule or state law there scholarship is up for review and can be revoked. The goal of the program is to produce future leaders in our communities that are sensitive to diversity and desire to make a difference now and in the future where they live, work and play. While they are given a lot much is expected of them in return.
We are impressed by the Act Six program as well as by PLU and excited to see where it takes Laurie in her journey called life. We will post the results on January 28th or as soon as her letter is received. No matter the outcome we are beyond proud of our daughter and amazed at who she is. We can’t wait to see who she will continue to become as her life unfolds before us. We are blessed! (*Reading this to proof it before posting brings me to tears. My daughter and her life amazes me. She is my hero!)

In your opinion what constitutes racism? Prejudice?

2010-01-22T08:11:00.000-08:00

Are the words racism and prejudice over used? Or maybe used in the wrong context? It seems nowadays one must use extreme caution with every word or phrase that comes out of their mouth when it has to do with a topic related to another race or might include individuals of another race or you risk being called a racist. I am not saying that we shouldn't think before we speak nor am I saying that it is okay to speak ill towards people of a different race.

If someone were to ask me if I am a racist or if I am prejudice I would say no. I have no preconceived feelings, notions, thoughts, or opinions of other races. I do not dislike any race in particular. In simple words I do not avoid blacks, Hispanics, Asians, middle eastern people or any people for that matter. And yet, as I began to type that sentence I couldn't stop my train of thought of whether or not I would be offending someone by putting blacks first or by using the word black instead of African American or people of color. And while my intention would not have been to offend is it offensive?

I am friends with anyone that I meet that appears to me to be friendly and through conversation I find I have things in common with. Many of those friends turn into relationships that develop through the amount of time we spend together having conversations around the topics that intrigue us both. Some of these relationships are long term and others more short lived. Some grow deeper as we find that we have even more in common than we first thought. And others trail off as we find we have more differences than commonalities. I do believe this is the nature of relationships. And yet, all of these have nothing to do with the color of ones skin or the heritage from which the individual came from nor do they have anything to do with preconceived opinions of their race. I am friends with people of all different races and lifestyles and in fact cherish the differences of who I am surrounded by in life. I like people and enjoy hearing their life stories. Big or small, we all have a story to tell.

Prejudice is a whole nother subject. Am I prejudice? Again, I would like to say no and yet I can't help but think that when I see a homeless person my first thought is that they may be harmful or that they made the choices that got them to this point. A prejudice is a preconcieved view or opinion formed before actually knowing the facts. In that case I would have to say that I do hold some prejudices. Maybe not against people of color or differing race but of people of different walks of life. I am a 'pull yourself up by your bootstraps kind of person' and that I believe leads me to hold the prejudice that those who aren't doing just that are failing of their own accord. And yet, honestly what do I know of their situation? Usually nothing as they are in fact a complete stranger to me. A very harsh and cold reality for me to see in writing that I am prejudice. Something I will have to think more about.

Not Ready To Die

2010-01-20T15:05:00.000-08:00

I am not ready to die. I am not concerned about the after-life. I know what I believe and I am certain of where I am going when I die. I’m just not ready for that to happen yet. I have so much more life to live. I want to see our daughter graduate from high school, college, get married, have children and live her life. I want to see who our son is going to become. He is only a toddler and has yet to begin reading and writing. I want to watch him grow into a big boy and then a young man. I want to grow old with Tom. I want to sit in our rocking chairs on the back deck or somewhere else and talk about all of the silly things our children did when they were little. I want to hear the laughter of our grandchildren as they play in our house. I want to make a difference in some young girls and women’s lives. I want to share who I was and who I have become and help them see they can do and be anything they want to be. I want to learn more about myself, my family, my friends, my community and those around me. I have a lot of life yet to live.

Why am I talking about dying? It seems the world is ever in a hurry to become more and more corrupt. Everywhere I turn there is destruction and death. No more is it nightly on the news but daily and nightly that we are presented with acts of violence in our communities. More and more we are seeing convicted criminals released from their punishment, set free on the world only to commit another and often more heinous crime then they had before. What was once looked upon as obscene is now becoming common place with coffee stands flaunting baristas with little to no clothes on. Recently there was a news report of a truck that would be taking to the streets of Portland, OR with windows for walls and a ‘peep-dance’ show inside as the truck drove up and down the streets of town. Despicable and yet accepted by society. I can’t help but think how much longer will God allow this to continue? At what point will he say, “Enough is enough” and send his son for the second coming?

It is not that I am not excited to go to Heaven. I am. It will be more amazing than even I can imagine, of that I am sure. I am ready to stand before God. To meet my maker as so many say. I know I will be held accountable for my life. I will have many things to answer to. There will be those things that I am ashamed of. Choices that I have made, even knowing they were not the right ones to be making. I will shed my fair share of tears of sadness and shame. And there will be those things that God will be proud of me for. The choices I made when faced with adversity and chose right instead of wrong. The times I put others before myself and did all I could to help. There will be rewards and for those I will shed tears of joy and thanksgiving. And in the end He will wipe my tears away and welcome me into Heaven. While not perfect I know in whom I have believed and am persuaded that he is able to keep me until that day. That is the amazing grace of salvation, completely reliant upon God and nothing to do with me. So, while excited to go to Heaven I have so much more life I want to live, give and experience here on earth first.
It is because of that, that I say I am not ready for death. I know it is inevitable and one day the time will come for all to die. I do hope my time is a long, long way away.

The long day....

2010-01-06T18:25:00.000-08:00

Today has been a long day. Finally at 4:15 I packed Michael into the stroller (all bundled up) and headed out for a walk. It was either that or I was going to put him in his crib, shut the door and walk away. I am not sure what got to me. Maybe the fact that I have been home with him for 3 weeks straight. Maybe it was because during that three weeks either I was sick, he was sick or we both were sick. Or maybe it was the fact that he says, "mommy" about 500+ times a day. Sometimes with nothing actually to say to me once he has my attention. I love my son. Even I have my limits and my breaking point. I just wanted some peace and quiet. So when daddy walked through the door he was greated with a wife asking him for at least 30 minutes of peace. My most wonderful husband took our son upstairs and has been there for an hour. I on the other hand poured myself a glass of cabernet, sliced some 'special cheese' and sat down for some me time. Nice.

Tax Credit Reminder

2010-01-05T14:04:00.000-08:00

Thought I would take a moment to remind everyone that the home buyers tax credit is still in effect. The new tax credit is good until April 30, 2010. That is the date that you need to have mutual acceptance on your offer. You do not have to close your purchase by that date. You have until July 2010 to actually close the sale and still take advantage of the credit. Also the tax credit is not just for first time home buyers. While first time buyers have the greater credit of up to $8,000 current home owners who purchase a new home may also qualify for a credit up to $6,500. For more information on the tax credit feel free to call or e-mail me.

Loving On Demand

2010-01-04T21:36:00.000-08:00

Day 3 - 40 Day Challenge and 2010 Goals

Although I sound like a broken record last night was another rough night with little Michael. I was up with him 3 times. I REALLY need a full night sleep. I can't wait for my good little 11-12 hour sleeper to return to his normal self. My body and my mind need an uninterrupted night of sleep soooo bad! The lack of sleep made today a little rough. I just wanted to go back to bed but I had to play with the little man, keep the laundry going, and go to Fred Meyer and Sam's club to do the weekly shopping. A little outing although tough with a little sick one in tow was just what we needed. It broke up the day and got us out of the house. After shopping at Freds we shared a slice of pizza and water at Sams before getting the items we needed. Then we headed home to have some stories and snuggles before Michael took his afternoon nap. Although I longed to go lay down myself I knew I needed to take the opportunity to answer some e-mails, wash some dishes and spend some time writing my book. After 2.5 hours of working I went to wake Michael as I wanted him to sleep tonight. We played for the rest of the afternoon until daddy got home. Then I made dinner for the family after which I ran to one more store to take advantage of a couple of coupons. Back home I made lunches for Michael and I as Tuesday is his one day at daycare and I go to the office. Feeling more than ready to crawl into bed I was plagued by the nagging thought that I still had not exercised for the day yet. Quickly reminded that I now had On Demand I looked for another quick workout. I found an ab workout and set to crunching. My abs are burning! I am loving On Demand. As soon as my sleep is back on track I will get into some better and longer workouts either from On Demand or on my elliptical. I would also like to ad in some jump rope time for a fun workout. I will also work on some more interesting blog articles than just my challenge updates. I know these will get old fast!

This day has come to an end and it is time for me to call it a night.

Girls Group, Goals and more....

2010-01-03T21:03:00.000-08:00

I can honestly say I did not thing that I was going to work out today. Being that it was only day 2 of the 40 day challenge I was annoyed by this all day. Last night was yet another night with little sleep. Our son was still sick and coughing a lot. He simply wanted to be in mommy's arms. I had moved the rocker into my room so I could at least watch TV to keep me going as I held my son so he could relax and get the rest his little body needed. After being gone from 9:00 PM to 11:00 PM at the local community teen late night I was back home and he was awake. I took him and held him in my bed and he quickly fell asleep in my arms. I told Tom to go ahead and go down to the guest room where he could get some solid sleep for half the night and that I would come get him to swap so I could then get some sleep. Just one more night I said then our son should be on the mend and back in his own bed. Tom did not waste a single moment but grabbed a pillow and headed to some quiet solitude and much needed sleep. My son continued to sleep on my near me, coughing often and every so often checking to see if mommy was in fact still there. I was able to doze off once for a little bit while he was sleeping next to me. Finally at 4:30 AM I decided I needed to go change places with Tom. I slept from about 4:30 AM until 8:20 AM when Tom and Michael came to wake me up. Almost 4 hours straight! Woohoo!

For the rest of the day Michael was either in my lap, in my arms or quite near to me. On the positive side it is evident that my son loves his mother. A very nice sentiment indeed. My body on the other hand is desiring a full nights sleep and very soon. Several times throughout the day I thought of my commitment to working out and wondered just how I was going to be able to fulfill it today. My energy level was a big fat zero. Mid morning I called Comcast as I was having issues with a few channels on the TV. The lady tried to help but in the end said a technician would need to come out. They were available today between 2:00 and 6:00. I said I would be home with a sick boy so that would work just fine. I asked her about the On Demand feature as it had never worked for me. I figured we just weren't paying for a package that included it. She assured me we should have it and that the tech could work on that. Comcast arrived at 4:00 PM and after replacing our box and the converter in the cable box in our closet our TV and the On Demand feature were now working.

This evening as I was thinking one last time that I simply did not have the energy or desire to work out even for a few minutes I remembered that On Demand had workout episodes. I perused the menu and found a 14 minute Ab workout. I grabbed my hand weights and started the work out. 14 minutes later I felt the burn and an even greater satisfaction of completing my 40 Day Challenge commitment. Not going to fast food was too easy today as I didn't even leave the house. :-) Okay, one more day in the books and on the blog.

As for my To-Do list, I am happy to say that I worked on my book today for about 45 minutes. Initially I was typing some of what I had written months ago and within a few minutes found that as I typed I was lead in another direction than I had planned for the chapter. The words were flowing and it felt good. I am looking forward to many more moments like this. Last night I went to the community teen late night and met with the teen girls. We all chatted for about an hour about goals for the year. Each goal set one goal which we wrote down. Then we gathered their birthdays and some ideas for outings that they want to go on. I spoke with the woman in charge and we are going to work together to get some guest speakers to talk to the girls in addition to planning some outings for just them. As the night wore on an incident happened where a window was broken in a room where 4 of the girls were hanging out. All of them said they had no idea what happened. They said they thought a rock had been thrown into the window from the outside. Oddly there was no rock and all of the glass was outside on the ground rather than inside the room. I told the other leaders this and they all realized the girls weren't being honest. We brought the 4 of them in the room and one of the leaders began to share with them that if we didn't find out what happened they would have to close late night right then and send everyone home. They would also keep it closed future weekends until they found out how the window had been broken. The girls just shook their heads and said they didn't know. I looked at them and told them that the truth was so much easier. If they told the truth the punishment would be small. If they continued to lie the punishment would only get bigger once we found out how it happened. If we didn't find out there would be no late night at all and they and all of the other kids would have no where to hang out on Friday and Saturday nights. Each girl looked at me and then one of them said she would tell us how it really happened. I said, "The truth?" And she said, "Yeah, the truth." The girls were goofing off listening to music. They went to the window and were looking out. They started banging lightly on the window to the music and then they banged harder and harder. Finally she hit the window so hard it broke. She then revealed a hand that she had been hiding in her sleeve until that moment. She had cut her knuckle on the glass. I walked over and looked her in the eye and told her how much I appreciated her honesty. I told her I knew it wasn't easy and while what they had been doing was stupid it sounded like it was an accident that the window actually broke. The other leader and I told them we would talk to the community center leaders and work on getting the window fixed. We would let them know she had been honest and ask that the punishment reflect that. We got her cut cleaned up and then Cindy spoke with all of the kids about being more careful with the windows, the danger of them breaking as well as the cost of replacement and threat that we may not be able to have late night if things continued to get broken or ruined in the building. Shortly after this another one of the girls came and asked if she could talk to me alone. She told me about some girls who had been bugging her a while back. They had shown up tonight and had recently threatened her on myspace that they were going to kick her a** when they saw her. She told me she was scared. I got the lady in charge and spoke with her. She knew these girls and knew of the trouble from the past. No time wasted, she grabbed the girls and took them into the office for a chat. After about 10 minutes they all came out. Problem solved....for now. A few minutes later another of the girls from the group asked to talk to me. She asked if maybe she could spend some time with Laurie and I. She said her mom is always sick and isn't able to do anything fun with her. This girl is one of the ones that I have told Tom I am most worried about. I feel she is quickly heading down the wrong road looking for attention in all of the wrong places. I can see a girl just wanting to be liked, loved, noticed and approved of. I told her I would talk to Laurie and we would see what we could do about that. Laurie later told me the girls brother is a senior in her high school. He was recently released from jail for auto theft. He is also a drug user. The girls mom uses drugs as well. My heart breaks for this little girl. Amazingly her goal for 2010 is to get a 4.0 in school. Something I will definitely be following up on. And so my goal of working with the teen girls has begun. I am certain it will be full of ups and downs. My only hope is that I will have an impact on their lives and help them as they struggle to find themselves as they go through their teen years. All the while influenced by their circumstance and environment.

#16 on my list, be positive has been a little more difficult. I do believe it is effected by my lack of sleep, but then again I am quite positive when all is well. So the point of #16 is to be positive in the more difficult times. Today was a bit of a struggle. I will say that having written the goal has brought it to the forefront of my mind and when I find myself complaining in my head or out loud I am quickly reminded that I want to be more positive. I feel my mood and attitude change before I get too negative. It's a start.

2010 To-Do List - Goals

2010-01-02T20:33:00.000-08:00

I mentioned previously that I planned to have goals or a to-do list for 2010. This is in lieu of resolutions as I believe they are nothing more than an opportunity to feel like a failure.

Here is my list that I will be working on this year. Some have a time deadline and others are for throughout the year. I will post along the way to update my progress and recap at the end of 2010 to see how the year went. Knowing me I will add to the list as time goes on.

2010 To-Do List/Goals

1. Finish Brokers Course in January
2. Take Brokers Cram Course
3. Take Brokers License Exam - Jan/Feb
4. Print all photos that are stored on laptop for albums
5. Make Laurie’s scrap book
6. Plan Laurie’s graduation Party
7. Plan a time to release my parent’s ashes with my siblings this summer.
8. Close 12 real estate transactions.
9. Write blog more often.
10. Spend at least 30 minutes a day writing my book.
11. Work with community teen girls at Saturday Night Late Night Program.
12. Plan future events with teen girls.
13. Learn how to apply for and get a grant for teen girl events.
14. Spend time with friends and family.
15. Go to church as a family.
16. Be positive.
17. Work on #39 from wedding vows “Be Nice”.
18. Be thankful.
19. Always work on my marriage (every day).
20. Nurture my relationship with my daughter and my son.
21. Put family first in all things.
22. Hold a garage sale and get rid of all items in and around my home that are not being used.
23. Complain less.
24. Walk 3-Day with daughter.

Day 1 - 40 Day Challenge

2010-01-02T20:26:00.000-08:00

Okay, day one has been difficult and easy altogether. Avoiding fast food was easy as pie. I didn't even crave it. I thought about it briefly when I was riding in the car from Edmonds to Seattle with Laurie. Often after our appointments with the therapist we pull into McDonalds for a burger and fries. Since Laurie has joined me on the 40 Day Challenge neither one of us even mentioned it. That one was easy. Exercising was a bit more difficult. Last night was the 4th night in a row that our son woke up at least 4 times. He has been running fevers, coughing and even a bit of vomiting. Tom and I are nearing sleep deprivation. Today Michael was more clingy than ever wanting me to hold him every moment whether he was asleep or awake. We decided to take him to the walk in clinic. I am so glad we did. Although we had spoken to his Doctor earlier this week and a nurse at Children's too who had advised us it was more than likely a virus that would runs its course, we felt he was getting worse not better. After speaking with the Doctor who also advised us that children often get viruses that run fevers and indeed need to run their course he took one look at Michael's ears and diagnosed double ear infections. Wow! Poor little guy. Michael is now on antibiotics but he was still in terrible shape all afternoon. He slept most of the day in my arms or daddy's. That being said I did not have more than a few moments without a child in my arms. I did find about two minutes to do some sit ups with my medicine ball and I plan to walk up to the community center at 8:50PM as I head up to meet with the local teen girls at late night (this topic will be another blog....)

While I didn't get to exercise as much as I would have liked I have kept to the challenge of at least doing something. :-)

Now to post my 2010 To-Do List/Goals .......

40 Day Challenge

2010-01-01T20:45:00.000-08:00

I have decided to do a few things in 2010. One I mentioned a few days ago is that I am setting goals or a To-Do List for the year rather than New Year's Resolutions. It will be a list of things that I want to get done throughout the year some of which I have been saying for a few years that I was going to do. I am going to make a commitment to get them done this year. The other thing I am going to do is set a 40 Day Challenge for myself. I think I heard it on the radio. A certain station has a dj that has challenged people to listen for 40 days straight. It got me thinking. I already listen to the station pretty regularly but I liked the idea of challenging myself to either doing something for 40 days or giving up something for 40 days. I have decided to take on this challenge for myself:

1. No fast food eating for the next 40 days.
2. Exercise of some sort every day for 40 days. (IE: Elliptical, walk, or abs and hand weights.)

My challenge will start on January 2, 2010 and last until February 10, 2010. I will try to post each day how I am doing in addition to whatever I am blogging. I will also be posting my Goals for 2010 by tomorrow.

Happy New Year!!!

Naps

2009-12-29T15:56:00.000-08:00

I didn't used to be a nap person. I tried but for some unknown reason I just couldn't go to sleep during the day for the most part. The only way I was ever able to fall asleep was if Nascar was on (I have never understood the fascination with watching cars go around and around for hours. Mind you I do understand that they are going at great speeds and need to have intense concentration and serious muscle to control the car at every moment that they are driving. I just don't understand the enjoyment of watching it from a spectators point of view. Even more so on the television.) Many a time have I lay on the couch listening to my husband dose off and thought to myself that a nap would be good. Only to find that the longer I lay there the more uncomfortable I would be become and I was unable to fall asleep. Now that last sentence sounds as though my husband takes a lot of naps. He doesn't. I would probably say prior to having a baby in all of the years I have been with Tom he had taken only a handful of naps.

Ever since having Michael things have changed in almost all aspects of our life. Even when it comes to taking naps. I found early on that I needed to take a nap most days just to make it through when he was waking 2-3 times a night. Even when he began sleeping through the night at 10 weeks old I found that I stayed up late to get things done that I couldn't during the day which led to my being tired during the day and thus needing a nap. The last couple of months I found that I was napping for 1.5-2 hours nearly every day. The days that I didn't I was so tired I found it difficult to function.

I started to get a little worried that maybe there was something wrong with my health. As soon as the thought entered my mind it quickly spread to worry about cancer or some other terrible illness that was making me so exhausted. I made an appointment with the doctor for an annual check up and requested blood work to check all of my levels to be sure there wasn't something wrong. After talking to the doctor about everything she told me that she would have my blood work done but quite honestly she thought I was just tired because I was the mommy of a little one and they simply deplete your energy with their constant need for care and attention. Really?

My blood work came back and the only two things she could point out that needed adjusting were my cholesterol was a wee bit high (nothing drastic) and I am low on Vitamin D. Most everyone in Washington is low in vitamin D and should take a supplement. I was low enough that she recommended I take 4000 IUs each day. For my cholesterol she suggested that I cut back on the amount of real butter that I use, reduce or eliminate baked goods (I haven't been a bad girl this Christmas....), make sure I do not eat cheeseburgers and fries on a regular basis and add fish oil to my diet since we rarely if ever eat fish. Other than that she said she still believed my tiredness is from being a 'new' second time around mommy. More than likely when our son gets a few years older and starts school I will regain much of my energy. Alrighty then! Until then a nap now and then may just be in order.

Another year nearly over.

2009-12-28T14:48:00.001-08:00

It's hard to believe another year is coming to an end. Equally amazing is that our son is nearly two years old and our daughter is well into her senior year and planning for college. The baby stage goes by so quickly and even children grow up faster than you think they will.

2009 has been a year of tightening the belt and learning to be content with what you have only partly due to the economy and the rest due to the choice of putting time with our children first. As much as I love having a successful career I cherish time with my children even more. There are so many moments when I find myself thinking just how fortunate I am to have the family that I have. Moments when I am watching my daughter play basketball and thrilled that I am there on the sidelines when she looks over. Moments when I hear my son giggling and yelling, "Hey, Hey!" as he runs from me and I think to myself, "There is no greater joy than the joy I feel right now in this moment."

I think 2009 has caused Tom and I to think about what is most important in life. To assess things like our home, where we live, how we live, how much money we spend, what we spend it on, what constitutes a date, a gift, what needs to be done now and what can wait until later, our faith, and our purpose in life at home, at work and in our community. I know I am learning new things about myself simply by taking stock in what is important to me and my purpose is. I can't help but realize that choices I make every day have an effect not only on me but on my family and others around me. How I respond or better yet react to things that happen quickly effects my attitude and like a trail of dominoes tumbles over into my home effecting my family whether I meant for it to or not. Easier to think about than it is to correct or change. It's amazing how thinking about your purpose in life can lead to new priorities and even a new outlook on the simpler things in life like dinner.

I haven't set New Years Resolutions in years. Actually I am not sure if I ever have but I think I may have once years ago. I am sure come January/February we will see a lot of talk shows with segments in regards to resolutions. It seems each year they have new advice on how we should or shouldn't set them or a new way to actually stick to them. I think rather than setting resolutions I am going to set a list of things that I want to accomplish. Nothing like a good goal! Over the next few days I will give thought to what I would like to accomplish in 2010 and then on New Years Day I will post my list(s).

Christmas Eve Tradition

2009-12-18T08:57:00.000-08:00

I am really looking forward to Christmas Eve. Every year we go up north to my cousins house just north of Arlington to the east of Standwood. My cousin comes from a family with 7 children. All are grown and all are married. Many have multiple children of their own now making the family quite large. My cousins mom is my mom's sister. We have spent Christmas Eve with them since I was a wee little girl in one way or another. When growing up I remember we used to go to my Aunt and Uncle's house on Christmas Eve. My grandma would be there and give each of us grandkids a small gift. As I got older I used to go do the shopping with her. It was actually quite fun to help her pick out gifts for my cousins. There was always a price limit. As more children were added to the family the limit got smaller and smaller. I think I recall it was $3 per child at one point. It isn't easy to find a gift for $3 but it was possible back then. Grandma and I had a lot of fun going to Sprouse Reitz and Kmart in search of all the presents. We would all gather at my Aunt and Uncle's house and grandma would sit and smile as each one of opened our gift. We would all give gifts to grandma too. Usually something we had made. It was a crowded house that night! After getting married we stopped going to their Christmas Eve. As each of my brothers and sisters had partners and started to have kids we began to have Christmas Eve at our parents house each year. In 2005 after our parents died my sister and I starting talking about Christmas and what we were going to do. My Aunt called and invited us to Christmas Eve. It no longer was at her house but was at her son's house, our cousin. We decided to go. With all of our cousins grown and raising families of their own you can only imagine how the crowd had grown. Seven cousins, seven spouses, many with 2 to 6 children each, some with children now having children making them grandparents themselves, it is easily over 50 people. I was thrilled to go and see them all. We sat in my cousins house and quite honestly did not recognize many of the people there beyond my cousins and their spouses. I had not seen many of the children before and those who were grown and had spouses of their own were new to us all. The wonderful part was the overwhelming sense of family. They all know each other. The room is full of laughter. Just listening to their stories and banter filled my heart with a sense of belonging. It was wonderful! Tom, Laurie and I have gone back each year since. We still do not know everyone there and that's okay. We are in our own little way a part of this family and that is a wonderful gift.

Describing Your Life

2009-12-18T08:29:00.000-08:00

If you had to describe your life in 5 words which would you choose? Even more difficult would be to use the first five that come to mind when asked the question. Last night I was writing in a few cards to send to family Scotland. Tom, Laurie and I went to visit Tom's relatives in Scotland the summer of 2006. Laurie and I thoroughly enjoyed meeting them and had a wonderful time touring Edinburgh, Aberdeenshire and a short jaunt to London. We can't wait to get back for another house swap as soon as we can afford to do so. I know they will love to meet our new little addition, Michael and see just how much Laurie has grown up over the past few years. While writing to them I shared how having Michael has brought not only a baby into our home but also new excitement for the little things in life. I found myself writing, "Our home is full of joy, love, laughter, and a few tears (quickly melted away with magical kisses and snuggles)." And you know what, our home has been this way since the day Laurie and I moved in with Tom. This is not to say we have not had moments of stress, times of sadness, or moments of misunderstanding. We are but humans. And yet, the moments of misunderstanding and times of sadness or tears are few and far between and all are melted away with a good long hug and words of compassion. When times are tough we have each other. Something that Laurie, Tom and I all cherish for our own reasons similar and different. Better still the times of happiness happen every single day. There is nothing greater in life than coming home to a house full of love, laughter, joy, compassion and listening ears. Knowing no matter what has happened it will always be your soft place to land and there will be someone there who cares how you are feeling. To hear my children thrilled to their very bones that daddy is home fills my body through and through with a love greater than anyone can comprehend. Laying in my bed watching an old Christmas special with my son and being joined by our teenage daughter and my husband all cramming together and scrambling to get our share of covers is a moment of joy that I will cherish now and forever. Waking and realizing that the man next to me loves me and loves our children more than he loves himself is a gift that not all men can give. Knowing when I am scared, nervous, frightened or anxious that my partner is but a phone call away ready to remind me of who I am and who I have become is beyond what I could have hoped for years ago. There was a time when all I wanted to be was happy, simply happy. No frills. No fuss. I didn't want a big house. I couldn't care less what kind of car I was driving (and believe me I had driven many makes and models). I had no particular brand or style of clothing that I fancied and there was no favorite perfume. All I wanted was to be and to feel happy for more than just a moment. I wanted it for a lifetime.

If I were to describe my life in 5 words, the first 5 that pop into my head they would be: Happy, Joyful, Laughter, Safe, Blessed. So, a few of my words are actually verbs and not adjectives. Somehow that is fitting considering our life is ever active and we always seem to be going here or there doing something. What is your list of five?

Normal

2009-12-11T14:57:00.000-08:00

Merriam Websters online dictionary reads:

1a: according with, constituting, or not deviating from a norm, rule, or principle b : conforming to a type, standard, or regular pattern

I'm not sure that is what I think if when I use the term normal. I suppose I would describe normal as like everyone else, but then maybe we are all a bit abnormal in all actuality. The dictionary goes on to say that normal is free from mental disorder or sane. Okay, that is along the lines that I think of. And yet, aren't we all at least a little insane from time to time? One can laugh, but really, stop and think about it. At one time or another we think the person talking to us is a little insane no matter who they are. It is common place to hear someone say, "I think they may have gone off the deep end." Or "He was slightly off his rocker today!" It has also become quite common for a defendant to claim insanity or temporary insanity for the crime they have been accused of. This is quickly becoming the norm in society. All that to say, Is there really a normal or are there degrees of normalcy?

It used to be that we thought to have grown up with a normal family it meant that you had a mother and a father in the home, they were married, the home environment was stable, peaceful and full of happiness. I suppose this picture came from television. I am not sure what life was like before television and if people spoke to each other about having a normal or dysfunctional home life. Nowadays I think through updated television shows, many hours of personal and family therapy experienced by the masses we have come to realize that the majority of people would have to describe their upbringing as some degree of dysfunctional. There are those rare cases of a stable home environment full of happiness but I personally believe they are the rarity rather than the norm.

So, what exactly is normal? I have at times thought to myself, "I just want a normal life." I think my perception of a normal life would include a stable strong marriage, healthy, well adjusted and thriving children, financial security, a bright future with obtainable goals for all in my family, days free from irritating nuances that plague a person with an irritable nature, generally good karma where we all give and thus receive what we need, life without trials and tribulations, love, laughter and happiness. I don't have very high expectations now do I?

In all reality life has its ups and downs. It's what we do during the downs and how we cherish the ups that help substantiate who we are. As much as I hate to admit it the trials I have lived through have built courage, strength, character, compassion, humility, passion and determination in me. In the times that I have felt weakest I have learned that I have strength beyond my imagination to continue on whether for the sake of my daughter or even for myself. When I have felt pain beyond what my heart could bear I have learned to lean on others and accept love and compassion and this has taught me humility. When I have felt that no one could possibly understand what I am going through I have learned that I am not the only one out there struggling. Even today when sharing with a girlfriend what has been going on this past week I found she stopped me as I was speaking of irrational fears to share with me what would have happened had she come down to meet me in the lobby and I had not been there. It was strikingly refreshing to hear that there are others who have minds that sometimes wonder on great imaginary bunny trails at warp speed when in all reality nothing is happening. And it was in this moment that I realized that maybe my life is exactly what I have longed for it to be, normal. It is my perception of normal that has been skewed for so long.

In light of that realization I no longer wish for a normal life. Instead I will continue to seek the qualities that strengthen me and help me through the ups and downs that inevitably happen in life. I will strive to be more aware during the downs so as to learn and to grow. I will focus on cherishing the ups. I will make a concert effort to enjoy every moment full of joy and pure happiness that life gives me as I spend time with Tom, Laurie, Michael and our extended family and friends. And I will be thankful for the times of quiet. Those moments when seemingly nothing is happening and yet it is simply peaceful. Life is not simply normal or abnormal it is a journey full of opportunity.